October is the month for pretty foliage, pumpkin everything, for people to freak out when it gets darker around 5:30pm, and of course, Halloween.

Regarding this festive holiday, there are four types of people when it comes to Halloween.

1) Kids

2) Adults who like dressing up

3) Adults who don’t really care about dressing up but who enjoy going to non-stop parties

4) People who like to get scared.

If you qualify in that fourth category, this playlist if for you. We figure that instead of playing Monster Mash over and over again, you need a real playlist that will make you so scared because the artists who sing them are actually the most frightening people in the world. Read on to see if the musicians who you can’t bare to listen to are on our playlist of the month!

And check out (if you’re brave enough) check out the entire playlist on Spotify!

Molly’s Picks

R. Kelly – Trapped In The Closet (Chapter 1)

I like R. Kelly’s music, most of the time. Really, I do. It’s just that I can’t see him without being reminded that whatever it is he’s doing, he’d probably rather be peeing on young girls.

Marilyn Manson – The Dope Show

All of the “goth” and “alternative” kids in my children’s theater troupe in the late 90s (shut up) were into Marilyn Manson, but Mainstream Molly here was not a fan. It’s not that I think he’s really violent – in interviews he’s a nice, normal guy. It’s the concept of a 40-year-old who is still hanging on to that teenaged urge to piss off “the man” that scares me.

Courtney Love – Celebrity Skin

I know. If Tavi loves her, I should love her. But still. If I can think of one person I’d be terrified to get into a twitter feud with, or date her ex-boyfriend, or run into when she’s coming down off some crazy drugs, it’s Courtney Love.

Tiny Tim – Tiptoe Through The Tulips

No. Nope. No, no, no. When I have a dream that I’m getting married by accident and have no way out of it, this is the face I see after my veil is lifted. While best known for his rendition of Tiptoe Through The Tulips, theres something extra-horrifying about this guy who sounds like a ghost  from the 1920s singing Do Ya Think I’m Sexy, Highway To Hell, and Stayin’ Alive (he covered them all)]

Hatebreed – Destroy Everything

I first heard about this band last year, when CNN mislabeled them as a white supremacist band. They’re… not?… I guess. Which is good, because we don’t want to give anything like that clicks. However, they still do seem to hate everyone. They just hate them all equally. I know you can’t judge a book by its cover, but that’s mostly what this post was about, and if I broke down on the highway and my choice was to get a ride with these guys or wait in an unheated car in a snowstorm 3 hours for AAA to show up, I’d take the latter, no question.

Traci’s Picks

Metallica – Enter Sandman

I listen to/can tolerate a lot of different genres of music – except metal. Anything that is remotely heavy metal or punk rock or screamo or doesn’t involve harmonies but does involve yelling and anger, I’m not a fan. My ears deserve better. Which is why one of the best heavy metal bands is on this list. I don’t appreciate middle-aged white men screaming at me in real life, I don’t appreciate it through the speakers either.

Rammstein – Du Hast

I remember when this song popped up in the 1990s MTV era and I was like ‘What in the world am I watching right now? Bring back BSB.’ If it isn’t apparent, Rammstein is a German band which was named after an air show disaster in 1988. And PS: Du Hast in German translates to ‘You Hate’, so there’s that. They’re known for their controversial (and offensive) stage shows and music videos, but they’ve sold 25 million records worldwide, so I guess there’s a market for this kind of crap.

Insane Clown Posse – Hokus Pokus

Alright, let’s be clear. Not only do I think people dressed up like this are scary, but the spectacle is completely unnecessary. I get that everyone has their freedom of expression, but ugh I just don’t get it or think it’s a good thing to be teaching the younger generations. Anyways, back to ICP – they definitely picked the appropriate name for their band, because they are exactly that. The first thing I think of when hearing ICP is the  Juggalo convention. Don’t know what it is? Get ready to have your mind blown (and mind blown here-NSFW/NSFL). Alcohol, drugs, nudity, sex, death, objectifying women, everything that’s great about America.

Slipknot – Snuff

There was a few kids at my middle school that liked Slipknot and I never understood why, because I felt like they should have merged their group with ICP, but also because they were scary as hellll. All the members wear masks from out of a horror movie, and no one knows their names since they all go by numbers or like, ‘guy with protruding pins coming out of his head’. The most disturbing thing is that their songs have inspired people to commit crimes and grave rob. Lit’rally rob a grave.

Gwar – Sick of You

Hi, this band’s members looks like if video game villains came to life and then they throw (fake?) blood into the crowd during concerts. Enough said. (Sidenote: since I’ve never heard a song by the last 3 artists, I just picked the most popular off Spotify. So I mean, my apologies if they’re the worst.)