Welcome back to another Friday installment of our TGIF live blog series! We’ve watched the pilots of Family Matters, Step by Step and Hangin’ with Mr. Cooper, and now it’s time for-NOT THE MAMA – Dinosaurs!
Season 1, Episode 1: Pilot/The Mighty Megalosaurus
Original Air Date:04/26/1991
Pilot Plot: Earl Sinclair must choose his role in life.
T: So here’s the thing – I remember watching only a few episodes of Dinosaurs, but thinking it was super weird. And perhaps not funny. But I think I was also just super aware as a kid that it was a weird show to begin with, and it might not have been up my alley. Could it have been the lifelike talking dinosaurs? Who’s to say. Never the less, I’m ready to give it another go!
M: I remember LOVING Dinosaurs and even having a Baby Dinosaur (… name?) figurine that I got at the corner store. To be fair, this was at the age where I was into weird humor – another fav was Ren and Stimpy. I also predict that I will not like it at all now!
T: I’d also like to note how vague the episode description is. It could lit’rally be about anyone, not even dinosaurs. I’m pretty sure that was the point of the show, but still.
M: I think it was very much a TGIF show but it’s Dinosaurs instead of people. I remember always thinking of Teen Boy Dinosaur as Dino Eddie Winslow and Teen Girl Dinosaur as Dino Laura. Yeah, I forget all the names except for earl.
T: The first scene is a fake newscast on “DNN” saying a giant meteor is heading towards Earth… this is a kids show. He says JK NO IT’S NOT right after but just so we’re all aware, the first joke is about impending death. Carry on.
M: I honestly blame/credit shows like this for instigating the weird meme-y culture our generation brought about.
T: I always forget Michael Jacobs, creator of Boy Meets World, also made Dinosaurs.
M: The more I think about it, the funnier it is that this concept was ever greenlit.
T: Guys, I think I didn’t connect with this show because it felt too much like Roseanne to me. Which I hateddddd. But again, people change.
M: Yes. I think Roseanne is a more apt comparison than Family Matters. They’re very blue-collar. You can tell because Earl has a shirt in a buffalo check pattern.
T: There’s another in TV set up, this time for the Dinosaur Shopping Network where a QVC-like commercial is going on and I can’t handle how real/fake this all is.
M: You don’t really see these Henson-y style shows anymore. It reminds me of Fraggle Rock, another fav during this era.
T: What is this pet they have? Oh it might be their dinner.
T: There are real people inside these costumes. Can you just image what this set was like on the down time? Fran is casually in the corner reading The Firm.
M: But like, how cool for those people to be getting residuals for this again, I guess.
T: CHARLENE IS VOICE BY SALLY STRUTHERS! AND FRAN IS JESSICA WALTERS! BABETTE & LUCILLE BLUTH ARE DINOSAURS YOU GUYS.
T: ALSO Earl wants a brand new 90 inch TV but they are literal dinosaurs. HOW. I’m just putting this together.
M: The trick to watching Dinosaurs is not thinking about any of it.
T: The year is 60,000,003
M: “Why we countin’ backwards? What are we waitin’ for?”
T: Robbie is acting like he’s Danny Zuko.
M: I WAS JUST GOING TO SAY.
M: Why did I like this terrible baby? This baby is terrible.
T: THIS T REX AND HIS ARMS. HE’S HOLDING A CIGARETTE. I CAN’T
M: Earl asks for a raise and the dinosaur boss has a construction trailer with binders and blueprints everywhere. Again, you’re not supposed to think about it.
“How was your day dear?”
“Compared to what Fran? Compared to walking off a cliff? Falling 10,000 feet, but living just long enough to see that first vulture swoop down and pick out my eyes? It’s a tie. Gimme a beer.”
M: The fridge is full of clamoring little critters. Heh.
T: YOU IN DANGER, EARL.
Frances, nothing in your little day is going to have an impact on how I live the rest of my life.
T: What if we just revealed pregnancies by moving our large dinosaur bodies just enough to reveal a large egg in a nest? And that women wouldn’t have to carry a human alien in our bodies for nine months?
M: Wait if that’s how it worked I 10/10 would have a kid. Esp. the dramatic reveal & the part where nothing leeches my calcium reserves.
T: How do dinosaurs have sex? (This might be a rhetorical question)
M: Look at Earl. Look at Fran. Look at that terrible baby. No WAY is he the father.
T: While out on a temper tantrum in the woods, Earl encounters the creature he almost ate for dinner, Arthur Rizzic, who changes his perspective on his own hardships. Teachable life lessons from dinosaurs – THEY’RE JUST LIKE US.
M: Disappointed they didn’t play the theme song, but slower, like they do in Full House or Family Matters.
T: Fran lures Earl back with a “Mastadon Surprise” which is probably just a casserole that’s been passed down in Fran’s family for years.
M: It might be how dinosaurs have sex.
T: Charlene doesn’t have pants on. She’s also looking straight down the barrel not apologizing for not wearing pants.
M: “Shirt, no pants like Winnie The Pooh” in the words of Lil Baby Aidy.
T: The baby sounds like a broken toy from Toys R Us.
M: Seriously f this baby.
T: Earl says dinosaurs are “going to rule the world forever” and it’s the most depressing thing I’ve ever heard come out of TGIF. And I’ve seen that Papouli ep of Full House multiple times.
M: We’re all careening towards oblivion WHEEEEEE
T: Well, safe to say I didn’t keep autoplay on for this.
M: Never again.