August is National Catfish Month

No, you did not read that incorrectly, and no I did not make that up.

In fact, National Catfish Month has been in place for over 20 YEARS. It was appointed to honor the U.S. farm-raised fish as well as the great farmers all over the country who take care of them.

But really, you didn’t click on this post because you’re a fish enthusiast, right?

If you’re like me, your brain probably immediately went to this image:

“Hi, I’m Nev. And this is my buddy Max.”

I’ve previously live blogged an episode of Catfish before, but many hopeless internet daters have come and gone since then. Nev and Max have exposed us to many fake people across the country, and they’ve also let us into their own special bromance that I can’t get enough of (But also, I love Nev and would probs try to Catfish him again if he didn’t have a girlfriend).

So I thought it was only appropriate to celebrate National Catfish Month by honoring our own American heroes – the ones who have helped bring a dose of reality to dozens of people in the U.S – as well as the Catfish they’ve caught in the past two seasons.  Here are a list of the best Catfishes (so far).

5) Sunny & Jamison

Sunny’s search for her true love Jamison was the very first episode of the series and really set the tone for the show. Turns out Jamison is really Chelsea, who created the profile to get revenge on a friend. But then we find out she’s bisexual and actually really likes Sunny. She’s also been teased a lot as a teen, and just wanted to be liked for once without the judgement of how she looked. Unfortunately, this is a common theme throughout the series, which explains why a lot of these folks make up the fake profiles.

4) Lauren & Derek

OH MY GODDD WE’RE IN DEREK’S DRIVEWAY

Lauren met Derek on MySpace and have been dating for the past 8 years. In those 8 years, she’s had a baby, was engaged, and broke it off because she  still had faith in her relationship with Derek – whom she’s never met. What’s crazy about this is that they met on MYSPACE. Tom would be so proud. Anyways, I hate to admit that this episode actually made me cry. It’s probably because of Lauren’s dad, but also maybe because she never doubted that he was who he said he was. Even Nev, who is usually the one who thinks ‘it’s really them‘, had to express his doubts that Derek wasn’t real. One of the few successful stories in Catfish history, Lauren and Derek go down in the internet record books.

3) Trina & Scorpio

Call me crazy, but this may be the first time I’ve sympathized with a stripper. A stripper who goes by ‘Trina the Natural’. And in all honestly, she’s the one that made this episode so great, not “Scorpio” aka Lee, who has 4 children instead of 2 like he told her, and is actually 32 and not 27 years old. She seemed so hopeful about Scorpio – and one of those women who are way too smart and charismatic to be an ‘exotic dancer’.

2)  Cassie & Steve

The second season of Catfish didn’t disappoint. Cassie had been through a lot over the past few years, after her father was brutally murdered. Amid alcohol, drug use, and sleeping around, Cassie found solace in a guy she met online named Steve.  They built a relationship and she began to turn her life around – and she even asked Steve to marry her – to which he said yes. Too bad he wasn’t real, because he turned out to be Cassie’s best friend IRL, Gladys. Oops. Gladys insisted she only did it to help Cassie turn her life around, which I guess is a good reason, if any?

1) Jasmine & Mike

If you only watch one episode of catfish, let it be this one. Jasmine had been in a relationship with Mike for the past two years, but had online chatted online and texted – never met or talked on the phone. Turned out that Mike was a girl named Mhissy, who Jasmine knew in real life. Mhissy was getting back at Jasmine for not leaving her boyfriend alone after they hooked up. But the first confrontation is out of this world – I don’t know how Nev and Max made it out of there alive.

Live Blog: Catfish: The TV Show – Joe and Kari Ann

If you missed my first post about my affection for this show, you can read all about how this program about internet dating will change your life. This was an episode that aired in early January, but if you haven’t seen it, you can watch it here (since it won’t embed ugh) and read along!

:00 OK, I really have high hopes for this one. This is finally going to be the one where they find true love.

:02 THIS PERSON LIVES IN WESTERN NEW YORK. JOE!!! PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE FROM ROCHESTER.

:04 I’m sorry, but this Kari Ann girl looks like a model, and Joe looks like a kid who works at a Blockbuster and plays in a garage band (sorry, Joe). She just messages him out of the blue?? But seriously, who messages anyone out of the blue on FB? Stranger Danger, folks!

:05 OMG WAS THAT THE ROCHESTER AIRPORT? Joe lives in Warsaw, which is basically equidistant from Roc and Buffalo – in other words, the middle of nowhere on a farm.

:08 Joe’s accent is so western NY, I can’t.

:09 Commercial for Snooki and JWoww is on. I’m not gonna lie to you people. I’m excited for this. In unrelated news: my job is ruining my life.

:13 Kari Ann was Miss Teen USA, has a kid, and she was a Playboy model…

:14 So usually, it’s really easy for Nev to find something sketchy on the person, but It’s taking a while for them to find something on Kari Ann. All the people the get in contact with check out. This is a good sign folks. I’m telling you, high hopes!

:17 Nev and Max meet Joe’s friends, including this girl Rose who clearly needs to put the girls away. I mean you are on TV, but you’re also on a go-cart track with hick boys.

:26 Nev and Max are staying in Geneseo!! Aka the town where Molly went to school!!

:29 Kari Ann calls him out for being a stranger all up in their relationship, and Nev says it’s ok because “it’s a good reminder that what he’s doing is weird.” I mean the girl has a point. Imagine if a random person calling you up and being like, so your internet BF is concerned that you’re not who you say you are. Now come meet us. Kbyeeee.

:30 Nev says he’s hot after the nerve wracking conversation and proceeds to take off his sweater. I just think he is the cutesttt (I’m sorry for the onoxious ‘ttt’, but I appreciate him a lot).

:31 “We’re country folk, we stick to our own” – Joe’s dad. ugh.

:32 Ok, it’s not that weird that Kari Ann was in NYC and didn’t tell him, because the city is SIX HOURS AWAY.

:36 Joe’s shaking, I’m shaking. It’’s always about the 35 minute mark into the show when I feel like I’m going to throw up from the anticipation of the significant other revealing themselves.

:38 FUCKIN ROSE. It’s been his friend the entire time. His friend that claimed she met Kari Ann IRL and became friends with her, and that’s how Kari Ann got in contact with Joe. But props to her for keeping up the fake Kari Ann profile. She’s been doing it for years and has ‘mastered’ the art of fake profiling. Right.

:40 I feel so bad for Joe because Rose could care less that she’s hurt his feelings. Also, stop trying to be a Playboy model, but them girls away.

:46 When faced with the decision to choose between a real relationship and fake internet relationships, she hesitates and says she’s not ready to give them up. This is getting more and more intense – she’s created a bunch of fake profiles, and even told one of them to get FB engaged. Hello?!

:47 This episode is turning into an episode of Intervention. The common denominator between a lot of these people pretending to be somebody else is that they’re lacking their own self-esteem, (see: Sonny & Jamison, Jasmine & Mike, Jarrod & Abby) and in order to gain the confidence they need, they turn to fake identities of an ideal version of themselves. It’s clearly a problem they need to seek help for, especially Rose, who has lied and conned a lot of people online.

:48 She decides to post a status telling everyone she’s going away for a while and requests for no one to contact her. Yeah, because that’s going to help her addiction. Just delete everything, you psycho.

:49 Not a psycho: Joe. The kid had his heartbroken and just needs a hug. Nev, hug the boy, will you?

:58 Rose deactivates her Kari Ann profile… for 24 hours. This bitch has 1,000 friends! I don’t even have that many and I’m a real person!!!!

:51 Before Joe parts ways with his internet investigators, he asks them to drive along side him in his ATV to test the speed. Country through and through.

:59 One month later, Rose moved to Cali to be with her BF – whom she met through the Kari Ann. Apparently he was more forgiving than Joe, because when they met and she wasn’t the Playboy model, he didn’t care.

:00 Joe is still single. But not looking for love online ever again. Good for you Joe Coco. Good for you.

Show You Should Be Watching If You Aren’t Already: Catfish: The TV Show

I watch an embarrassing amount of television. I take that back. I just watch a lot more television than the average person. Given my real life job is revolved around TV, but in addition, I am, and always have been obssed with television. So in saying that, I have seen a fair share of good and bad programs, but I’ll be sharing some shows here that I think everyone should pay more attention to, because they are well worth your time.

PS: Watch this space, because I liveblogged a recent episode, and it was good. Oh it was good.

Catfish: The TV Show


Cat·fish [kat-fish] noun — a person who pretends to be someone they’re not,
using social media to create a false identity, particularly to pursue deceitful online romances

When I first saw the Catfish movie about 2 years ago, I freaked out because it was so good. It was so good that I watched it twice before returning it to Netflix HQ. Like those who had seen it before me, I also refused to let up on the plot and outcome, because giving it away would ruin the entire point of the movie. HOWEVER, it’s nearly impossible to not ruin it without telling you about the consequent TV show that came out of the movie.

This show is hosted by Nev Shulman, who was the creator and subject of the movie. He basically helps people who have been in an online relationship with someone, but the trick is that they’ve never met in real life. And as things get serious between the internet daters, questions may start to arise like – why the hell haven’t we seen each other IRL yet what are you hiding from me are you wearing pants while we talk?

So basically Nev helps them solve the mystery if their online beau is legit or not, and they go to their house to see if they’re the real deal. 99% of the time, they’re not who they say they are. CHRIS HANSEN, WHERE ARE YOU? jk, not shit like that. But I mean, like you never know who’s on the other side of the screen.

Also, Nev is the best. Like the cutest. Like I’ll create a fake profile for him, I will.