In 1993, the men of Bayside High left Mr. Belding behind and continued on to higher education by attending California University. Now if they were real, which in all honesty they sometimes are in my head, Zack Morris, AC Slater and Samuel ‘Screech’ Powers kicked off their journey exactly 20 years ago this week. “20 YEARS?!”, you say? Yeah. 20 years. 1993 was 20 years ago, and 2003 was 10 years ago, a fact that I always always fail to believe.
Just like real life, Saved by the Bell (the high school era) ended in May, and months later, the crew started college in September and while the constant repeats made us believe this iteration ran on for approx 2 seasons, it actually only ran for 19 episodes. That’s 19 episodes for young, impressionable kids to find out what college life is like through a fake TV show. Seriously, I didn’t know anyone in college at the time, so what I saw on SBTB was what I assumed college (and high school for that matter) was going to be like.
Of course, now I know that it wasn’t really supposed to be treated as a college bible.
Expectation:
All your best friends will go to the same college as you.
Not only will your gang ALL be accepted into the same school, but you will all decide to go there TOGETHER.
Reality:
You will go to college alone.
If you’re lucky, you’ll have a buddy or two. Otherwise, man up and find new friends.
Expectation:
You will share a spacious triple and suite with your roommates
Reality:
You will be crammed into a double with a stranger
Robin Scherbatsky’s cubicle is roughly the size of a normal college dorm room.
Expectation:
You will meet a dreamy boyfriend/girlfriend – and that person will be your professor
Oh Professor Lasky. He was a handsome, single dad who crossed the line with his student/babysitter. At least you’re the reason Kelly decided to finally tie the knot with Zack.
Reality:
You will date randoms and half of them will probably be gay
That’s what college is for, right?
Expectation:
You will be forced to join a sorority/fraternity and undergo a ridiculous hazing process
And that hazing process will include Nickelodeon slime and a frat leader who is actually the younger version of Billy Chambers from Scandal.
Reality:
You don’t have to join Greek Life at all
Nothing against Greek Life, but if you’re like me and are too lazy and poor to join an organized group of friends, this will be a relief.
Expectation:
You will be able to redecorate anything and everything in your dorm
And your suite (which connects the boys room to the girls room) will be big enough for a poker table in the living room.
Reality:
No tacks, staples, tape on the walls, no microwave, no hot plate, no fridge, and absolutely no room for anything.
In reality, not a big deal. But still annoying.
Expectation:
Turning a dorm room into a rave will be super easy and fun and include stolen nitrous oxide from the science department
Painting the walls black will be a breeze! And all these people in a small area won’t break any RA-set sound ordinances or anything.
Reality:
You won’t even go to rave, just a bunch of house parties in dingy apartments/basements, fill your red solo cups with indiscernable types of alcohol
Honestly, all part of the college experience and worth the vomiting for the anecdotes
Expectation:
You will befriend a lab monkey who later escapes but then comes back
This was an actual plot line. And that chimp is actually wearing a dress.
Reality:
No monkeys. No monkeys at all.
Thank God. Although it sounds kinda fun, no? Yeah, no.
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