Coachella 2017 Fashion Wrap-Up

Another Coachella is in the books, and once again we chose to enjoy the festivities from the relative comfort of our living rooms (what can I say, I can’t even go out in the upstate New York sunshine for more than a half hour without consequences). We may not be wearing flower crowns and using porta-potties in a desert, but we still love keeping tabs on the performances, the celebrity interactions and especially the outfits. Coachella is a time when anything goes — it may not always look good, but that’s not the point. It’s a time when you can mix and match outlandish colors and patterns, over-accessorize, and pull out that hat that’s just too floppy for ordinary use. Let’s have a look at some of the fashion moments of Coachella 2017:

Actual Musicians

The Gucci tank top and sunglasses: pretty expected. The crystal bodysuit: next level. Rihanna never disappoints.

Tennis (Alaina Moore and Patrick Riley) proves that the venn diagram of hipster style and your parents’ photos from 1984 now just forms a circle. Dad jeans, white tourist sneakers, and my mom’s old perm – finally stylish again after all these years.

Brian D’Addario of The Lemon Twigs is picking up where Harry Styles left off, reviving the plaid suit from ’70s car dealerships to rockstar glam. This one’s from the Gucci heritage collection.

Kehlani performs and potentially ushers in the return of the ultra wide leg pant.

I’m the first to admit that I don’t know who Tacocat is, but if you asked me to come up with the quintessential Coachella performance outfit, this would be it.

Lorde knows if you can’t wear space pants to Coachella, where can you?

Thundercat usually has some kind of a fanciful hat, and I’m calling this one a tribute to Luna Lovegood. Actually, I’m calling Coachella in general a tribute to Luna Lovegood.

Disney (Channel) Princesses

One of my favorite 90s throwback looks is the floral sundress, and Selena Gomez’s dress looks almost exactly like a little number I sported c. 5th grade, 1996. She looks fresh, summery and comfortable. The Weeknd has some dressed-down Justin Timberlake Canadian Tuxedo vibes, which isn’t a value judgment, it’s just something I’m seeing.

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Found my throne 😍😝

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Continuing in the grown-up Disney starlets portion of our post, Vanessa Hudgens is a Coachella regular and I love this bright, draped take on a caftan.

This look from Vanessa Hudgens plays it a little less safe, and I can just hear Jennifer Lopez as Selena saying “it’s a BUSTIER!” Two things you saw a lot of in crowd photos: that black hat and chokers.

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Ok here we go! #coachella2017

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Speaking of looks not everyone can pull off, Ashley Tisdale rocks some high-waisted mom jeans with brown booties, a denim jacket and another Selena-style bustier, and it looks cute and casual, not to mention practical with all of that sand and dust and sunlight.

Prettiest Little Liars

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Take a bow #revolvefestival @revolve

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Troian Bellisario looks sweet, summery and sunshine-ready. This may be the look with the best crossover-potential to your normal summer lifestyle.

Shay Mitchell documented the weekend on YouTube, with a camera crew, makeup artist and hairstylist… which can sound like a lot until you remember that for celebs, Coachella isn’t just a weekend trip, it’s a business opportunity to pair with sponsors and raise their profile. Plus, Shay seems like such a sweet person that I can’t even get too salty that her weekend wardrobe is bigger than my wardrobe in general.

 

Ashley Benson debuted neon-pink ombre hair at Coachella. I don’t know about all of you, but I am not at ALL sick of the neon/pastel/rainbow/mermaid hair trend. Love it.

Early 2000s Nostalgia Corner

Paris Hilton has been going to Coachella since some of the younger attendees needed afterschool babysitters, and celebrated her 10th year at the festival with a beweled rainbow dress, cat ears, heart sunglasses and rainbow butterfly wings.

Ashlee Simpson leaned more towards the put-together LOOK style with a heavily embroidered jacket and matching studded blue pants. Evan Ross always looks good, although his shirt is that print that every stylish old lady had a scarf version of in the late 80s … although the Dynasty throwback is probably intentional.

Prime Time Players

Sophie Turner’s muscle tee is literally a tee that says “muscle,” which I kind of love. The faded strawberry-pink hair and pink booties tie it together in a look that’s casual enough to actually hang out in the sand.

Yara Shahidi is one of our blog favorites, and it’s because of looks like this. It’s fun when people go off-the-wall for festival fashion, but Yara always looks pulled-together and accessorized to just the right level.

 

Emma Roberts is getting her inner Anne Shirley on, because those are some puffed sleeves. My favorite part is the tie front though.

Apparently Ariel Winter’s long pink ‘do is a wig, which has got to be a lot easier on your hair if you just want a quick change-up for the weekend.

Cole Sprouse called out Coachella-goers for appropriating fashion like Native American headdresses, so it is no surprise that he dressed completely appropriately in this deconstructed, rumpled white tunic. What DOES come as a surprise is that Cole Sprouse is now a handsome adult man, even though I do know that that’s how time works. Guess I should be watching Riverdale?

Best Dressed and Not-So-Favorites: Met Gala 2016

Awards season is over, and this time of year we cut out the middleman: instead of dressing up for the sake of film or music, at the Met Gala celebrities are dressing up to celebrate …. dressing up. The theme of the 2016 Met Gala: Manus x Machina: Fashion in an Age of Technology. Hooray! This theme is far less likely to produce accidentally racist ensembles than China: Through The Looking Glass (2015’s theme). Plus it’s basically asking everyone to wear weird techno cyborg shit, which sounds like an absolute blast if you ask me. The result: one of my favorite nights of Met fashion in the past several years.

Best Dressed

Rita Ora in Vera Wang

The rest of the list is in no particular order, but this belongs at the top. I don’t even care about the feather duster comparisons that have shown up online. She looks like a beautiful silver peacock and I’m amazed. If I could make one alteration, I’d lose the cutout panel on the legs, which – believe it or not – is the only thing that might edge this look into “too much” for me.

Poppy Delevingne in Marchesa

Some gene pools are just prettier than others. But honestly, I can’t stop looking at this dress. This might be the first time I’ve been on board with the Fringe Revival 2K16.

Claire Danes in Zac Posen

Hold on, let me just dim the lights a bit.

Nicole Kidman in Alexander McQueen

Nicole Kidman, for me, lives in the same fashion neighborhood as Kerry Washington and Cate Blanchett – improbably beautiful, ethereal ladies who can pull off anything… but whose fashion gambles don’t always work for me. But this? This is some stars and moon, caped Stevie Nicks realness. She looks like the sky in an Edward Gorey illustration. Amazing.

Zayn Malik in Versace + Robot Arms

I don’t know if robot arms are “good fashion” or whatever but I do know that I laughed out loud in delight when I saw this. Solely because these “go-go-gadget solo career” arms are cracking me up, this is one of my favorites. Okay, Gigi Hadid looks pretty great in Tommy Hilfiger, too.

Tavi Gevinson in Coach 1941

I’ve been following Tavi since her early Style Rookie days, when she was just a typical preteen in a giant hat in the front row at NY Fashion Week. She’s come so far and done such great things that I can’t help but be as proud of her as if I had some sort of a personal stake in her success – like a really great little cousin, or something. Tavi has come a long way since her DIY Comme des Garcons outfits, into a more sleek adult style that’s still fitting of a young editor/ Broadway actress/ future queen of America.

Kate Hudson in Atelier Versace

In some photos, the cutouts are even more “wait, what exactly is going on here” and that’s why I love this. It’s like when your one friend gets a Cricut machine and starts making a bunch of weird paper art stuff. Like, did someone make this dress by folding it in half then snipping out shapes, snowflake-style? I hope so, because that’s the only way I could love it more.

Alessandra Ambrosio in Balmain

See: Hudson, above. I think some of the best Met dresses are the ones that would easily be a worst Oscars dress.

Least Favorites

I’m not in any position to call any of these couture looks “bad,” and on a night when avant garde fashion is celebrated I don’t want to criticize anyone for taking risks. If not now, when? So instead, I’ll say that these were the looks that did not make my personal favorites list:

Selena Gomez in Louis Vuitton

First things first, Selena looks as beautiful as she ever has (which is: very). But is it just me, or is this more like a regular, H&M looking dress with a little leather thing on top? It did get more interesting when I scrolled down and saw the boots, and this is the closest out of any of last night’s looks to something I’d wear in real life, but I guess that’s just it. I don’t WANT to see something I’d wear in real life.

Beyonce in Givenchy

You know that tumblr meme about being a judge on Chopped and kicking people off because “it has mushrooms?” Which is so brilliant because on one hand it pokes fun at the poster for having arbitrary and “low-brow” tastes and criticisms, while on the other hand pointing out that all criticism is on some level arbitrary and based on personal preferences. Anyway. That’s me with anything bandaid-colored and latex-y. This is technically very good but I’m like “nah, looks like flesh-colored silly putty. Next.” As the internet was quick to point out, this looks like it was made of finest Becky Skins.

Lady Gaga in Versace

EVERYTHING IS EVERYTHING from the waist up, even or especially her Mello Yello-colored 80s hair. But then I’m just bored of the no pants thing. But like, hard yes on everything other than her metallic undies. I almost want to put this on my best dressed list instead because, like Zayn’s robot arms, at least this is fun. Plus you always get bonus points if you really go for the theme, right? Yet my problem, I guess, is that the no-pants look is so expected for her that I wanted a departure.

Dakota Johnson in Gucci

It actually looks like there’s some great texture going on with the stars, but this is another “ew, mushrooms” pick for me: this particular kind of star shape, in these colors, reminds me of the Hot Topic looks that were around in the early-mid 2000s.

Why Spring Breakers Is a Movie Worth Your Time

spring breakers

When I first saw the trailer for Spring Breakers, the thought that immediately came into my head: ‘shitshow.’

And to some effect, I still maintain it is after seeing it, but in a sense that the characters themselves are a total, complete mess.

If you don’t know what this movie is about, really all you need to remember is that it’s about 4 BFFs who go to Florida for spring break, and insanity ensues – especially after they meet this drug lord/rapper. There’s drugs, sex, alcohol, guns – not for your regular Disney Channel fan.

I saw the movie a couple weekends ago when it opened, and Harmony Korine, the director, surprised the audience by coming in right before the movie and talking about it for a little while. Korine, flanked by the “ATL Twinz” from the movie, said to ‘keep an open mind’ about the film, which is what I did – and suggest you do too.

please note the twin on the left, whose backwards pants say 'FUKK'

please note the twin on the left, whose backwards pants say ‘FUKK’

After the 90 minutes of neon lights, dubstep music, and the alarming gunshot sounds signaling a scene transition, I had to take a few minutes to come out of the Spring Breakers world and back into reality. I didn’t really know what to think, to be honest. It was exactly what I thought it would be, but so much more than I could have ever imagined. If I had to sum it up in one word: jarring. The very first scene you see (and I’m not spoiling anything here) is a bunch of real life college kids on spring break. They’re dancing on the beach, half naked, drinking excessively with funnels in tow, and it looks like something out of Girls Gone Wild. With that scene alone, you’d think the entire movie is just about these four girls engaging in illegal activities, but come to find out, the Girls Gone Wild scene is way tamer than the shit they get themselves into.

The first half of this movie shows the girls trying to figure out a way to procure enough money to travel from their lame college life in Kentucky, down to a place that is far more exciting – Florida. A couple of them violently rob a restaurant for the cash, and they make their way down to the Sunshine State, where the R-rated partying ensues. Unfortch, the police bust the motel party they’re at, and the ladies land in jail. In their bathing suits. Luckily, James Franco’s character, Alien (Al, for short), comes to bail them out. The second half of the movie is the group trying to figure out if he really wants to help them or if he has ulterior motives.

A couple things hold me back from saying this was a great, amazing, top notch movie. One, I don’t like violence in films. Per a previous post about never having seen Kill Bill, Pulp Fiction, any Quentin Tarantino movie really, is because I am just not a fan of guns and blood and violence. All those things happen in this movie. The other reason is that it’s hard to pin down what this movie was set out to be. It definitely had its serious moments, but it also had its fair share of comedic ones as well, and not intentional comedy. When James Franco first comes on the screen, he looks like this:

And then he speaks and it’s hard to NOT laugh at him. Because all you see is James Franco looking like a complete idiot. I don’t think that was the original intention, but I find it hard to believe any viewer wouldn’t think that at first sight. The ridiculous monologue he has about “all his shit” is a perfect example. He’s going on about all the money, guns, and paraphernalia he owns, but there’s a part of me that says, ‘am I supposed to be taking this guy seriously or not?’

My favorite scene, which kind of falls into the category of ridiculous dramedy, is a scene involving the girls, James Franco, a piano, guns, and one of Britney Spears’ all time hits. In fact, someone actually wrote an article about how the entire movie is a metaphor for Brit Brit’s life, which frankly is a theory I can get behind.

Now I have NEVER experienced a spring break like these before, and I think most college grads can agree. The most I ever did was go to LA and visit my friends, where we went on a tour of Warner Brothers studios and sang karaoke at Mr. Belding’s bar. But I know that these people actually exist, which is why this movie is not that far off from the truth. Sure, meeting a guy like Al is extremely rare, but this culture exists. The bottom line is that it exists, people, and that’s why this movie isn’t taking advantage of girls in bikinis and ripping away the innocence of young Hollywood starlets. While I can totally understand how you would think that, you have to realize that this is not a porn movie. It’s not meant to exploit people for your pleasure. It’s meant to explore a culture of young adults looking for something more than what they have, and more than what they are. Wanting to escape the mundane world they’ve known all their lives, in search of something more exciting. A need to have experiences they probably won’t have ever again. If you are sane and have a good conscience, hopefully you’ll take away that this movie is the exact OPPOSITE of how you should act, and not a how-to instructional video. In fact, all the naked girls and sex scenes in this movie should turn you off, not on.

This review from Boston.com is an accurate description of how I feel about Spring Breakers, and explains the reason why I even took time out to write this post in the first place. This film won’t win any Oscars, but it will certainly be a talking piece for anyone that sees it. It stays with you. And isn’t that really what filmmaking and creating art is all about?

This is the rare movie that I actually found myself liking more the longer I spent away from it and the more I thought about it — mainly because I couldn’t stop thinking about it. In the moment, I found it numbingly repetitive, even boring at times: an obvious juxtaposition of sex and violence, of dreamlike aesthetics within a nightmare scenario. And it is all of those things. But it stuck with me, and it made me appreciate the genius of Korine’s approach.

So friends, if you see this movie, remember to keep an open mind, and most importantly remember: Spring Break Forever.

Live Blog: Wizards of Waverly Place Reunion: Alex Vs. Alex

After one long year, the cast of WoWP have reunited for a TV movie. It’s been a long year, let me tell you guys. But really, was this reunion necessary? Well, I suppose it doesn’t matter, because here I am, live blogging it on a Friday night. I’m a party animal, y’all!

For a brief recap: We last saw our wizards competing in the family wizard tournament. Justin (David Henrie) was a shoe-in because he’s the smartest of the fam, but right before the finish line, Justin got his foot stuck in a random tree branch that was protruding out of a cave wall. Right behind him was Alex, managed to avoid said branch, and was about to win the tourney but decided to help her brother out and let him be the fam wizard. Justin raced ahead, and officially won, but he was all, ‘no I don’t deserve this Alex does’, so she got to be the family wizard instead. But as a consolation prize, Justin was hired to be a professor at Wiz Tech school, and Max, who usually got the short end of the stick, got the family sub station restaurant.

And so we begin…

They’re back! Also, I’m dying over Selena’s outfit!

:01 I’m already missing David Henrie. He really couldn’t get it together to be in this?

:02 Oh no! Alex has been charged with treason for trying to ruin the mortal world. And sassy Alex is back, y’all!

:03 I’m confused about the timeline in this. Is this right after the competition?

:05 Justin sends his ‘friend’ Dominic to say he can’t come home for the party celebrating his professorship at the Wizard school, WizTech. Friend, huh? Is this a Dumbledore situation?

gay dumbledore beard

because he’s gay.

:07 They’re going to Italy? Did I know this? Can’t believe Justin’s missing this. Alex creates a door to Villa di Russo, where there’s a hot girl that Max decides to run after. Subsequently, the rest of the family + Harper follows.

:10 “There are no Italians in New York!” – Max, still stupid.

:12 “Where everyone else sees trouble, I see magic. And Beauty.” – Dominic, who is hitting on Alex, and is also the kid from MTV’s Awkward. British werewolf Mason/Gregg Sulkin comes in all pouty because he realizes Alex is being super selfish with her magic, even though she turned his lame picnic into a bucket of chicken.

:15 “Why is everything you’re wearing is from the 90s? – Alex “Oh, but when you guys wear it it’s vintage?” – Jerry

:17 The Alex/Harper BFF relationship has always been my favorite. And it’s like they never went away. Harper is back to wearing odd clambake outfits and Alex has a library full of quips.

:18 Alex conjures a spell to get all her mean parts out of her because her family keeps calling her selfish, but per usual, the spell doesn’t quite work and an evil Alex appears in the mirror (hence the title, Alex vs. Alex). Mean Alex screams, “Let me out of here you ugly hags!” DID SHE REALLY SAY ‘HAGS’ ON THE DIS CHAN?

:21 Max is chasing after a hot girl, who turns out to be his cousin. Whoops.

:24 I am loving Evil Alex’s yellow blazer! Even if she captured Max, made him 2 inches tall, put him in a vial which she carries around in a charm bracelet. I’m gonna go ahead and assume she manages to capture all the other members of her family, until it’s a showdown between her and the final vial inhabitant: Good Alex. $10 bucks, internet.

:25 This is turning into an I Love Lucy episode with Jerry and Teresa stomping grapes in a huge barrel. Oh and they disappeared – into EA’s vial. Oh shiiiiit Awkward Dominic is in cahoots with EA! How? Why?

:29 “Dominic is evil?” – Good Alex “Is it weird he’s even more attractive now?” – Harper. Girl gets it.

:30 AwkDom created a machine (the Dominic 1000) capture every mortal wizard so he can rule the evil wizard world. Naturally.

:36 AwkDom’s next target is Alex’s BF, Mason, and he gets caught in between EA & GA, but decides to trust the evil one instead, and she puts him in a vial too. And now she’s wearing this weird cape thing. Should’ve stuck with the blazer.

:38 “People should appreciate you for who you are. Not who they think you should be.” Harper, doling out life lessons since ’07.

:40 The random streak in EA hair that’s been shown in all the ads isn’t as prominent in the movie as I thought. Also why is it white?

:41 AwkDom makes Alex do the spell that will make the Dominic 1000 work, so now every mortal wizard from around the world is being captured in weird beads. She gets the vial bracelet back but just as she’s about to reverse the spell, we flash forward to the crystals of justice form the beginning of the movie who find her guilty of treason, and sentencing her to death. At first Alex thinks he ordered her a week banned from sweets, but it was the wrong sentencing. Then he changed to death, which Alex said, “Death by chocolate?” “No. Death by death.”

:45 Mason escapes the vial after AwkDom stupidly breaks it himself. He turns himself into a werewolf to help her escape, and it works.

:47 EA and GA are literally having a Harry Potter-like showdown right now. And now Selena is beating up herself. Wonder if she was taking out all her Bieber agression this way…

:51 GA is doing some gymnastic type moves up in here. literally upside down in the air. AwkDom drops the vial bracelet off the edge of the Leaning Tower of Pisa (where he placed his machine). But Mason comes to the rescue when AwkDom tries to get GA to to join him, and pushes him over the edge. Guys, there’s a dead wizard at the bottom of the Tower of Pisa. There has GOT to be some tourist taking a pic who is so confused right now.

:54 Alex just cast a spell that not only saved the world, but took away her powers at the same time. In front of the Crystal jury, her guilty verdict was overturned, and they refused to give her the powers back of all the previous times she almost ruined the world. Alex states that Harper is the only one who accepts her for her flaws and deems HArper all the magic she needs. Aw. And just as they walk away without her powers, she gets her magic back because she’s proved she’s mature with the whole I love Harper speech.

:59 And that’s a wrap folks! It ends with bloopers, which are my favorite. If you ever need a pick me up, just search for bloops on YouTube (Friends, HIMYM, The Office are some of my faves). Also there’s a preview for a DCOM called Teen Beach Movie which is like Grease meets West Side Story meets HSM…. I think I’ve hit the age appropriate limit for these things.

pc out wizards!

Si Se Puede! The Best of DCOMs

dchan

a horribly photoshopped shot of my head on la laine’s body, living out my dream of doing the dchan bumpers

I have no shame in saying I love the Disney Channel. Back in the day, having it was a luxury, since it wasn’t part of the regular cable lineup. Finally, it became part of the regular cable package sometime around 2001, and because this one time unattainble network was at my fingertips whenever I pleased, I became obsessed. Also, I got into it at a fairly older age, which explains why I dressed up as the Miranda to my friend’s Lizzie for Halloween like, freshman year of high school.

Anyways, as many of you know, Disney Channel Original Movies (or DCOMs, as the cool kids call them), hit the height of their popularity around the early 2000s. Hit after hit after hit, these gems would be a good reason to stay in on a Friday night. Or if you were me, I had no social life so I justified spending time with Hilary Duff instead. Here are some of my favorite DCOMs, that were totally my jam. Spoiler: There is no Zenon, Halloweentown, or Brink! on this list. You’ve been warned.

Ed note: I had Tia and Tamera’s Seventeen Again on this list, but upon my research found out it was not a DCOM but in fact first aired on SHOWTIME. Boy has their programming changed.

Wish Upon a Star
This movie was made in 1996, but I obviously saw in when they re-aired it in the 2000s. Starring a young Katherine Heigl and Danielle Harris, this was a Freaky Friday-esque movie where two sisters magically swap bodies because of a wish they made on a star. Hilarity ensues. For the longest time my only reference to Katherine Heigl was this movie. Right when Grey’s was becoming popular, I was always like, ‘that’s the girl from Wish Upon a Star!’ I was the coolest.

The Color of Friendship

Friendship is colorblind, y’all! This movie was based on actual events about a girl is from a wealthy (white) family in an apartheid South Africa, and goes to Washington D.C. as an exchange student. She slowly but surely forges an unlikely friendship with her host sister (who is black) and they learn about the real color of friendship.

Tru Confessions

One of my faves, this is seriously one of Shia LeBeouf’s greatest roles. No, really. He plays a mentally challenged kid, and his twin sister, who is the only one he really trusts and confides in, makes him the focus of a documentary film she’s making. It’s heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time.

Gotta Kick it Up!

SI SE PUEDE!!! Before there was Bring it On, there was Gotta Kick it Up. Before Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, there was a young America Ferrera. A fun and inspiration movie about young Latina girls who aspire to win their dance team championship. Literally like Bring it On but with Spanish.

Cadet Kelly

Hilary Duff goes to military school and proceeds to learn how to do color guard stuff with rifles. Also starring Even Stevens’ Wren and an Ashmore brother.

Get a Clue

A young and innocent Lindsay Lohan (RIP) plays a Harriet the Spy type girl who attempts to solve the mystery of one of her missing teachers. Also, Alfalfa is in the movie, and it was initially jarring to see him all grown up, since the last time I saw him it was on my personal VHS copy of Little Rascals. But Bug Hall grew up like the rest of us and is now randomly BFF with David Henrie from Wizards. I know too much.

Princess Protection Program

I ship Delena, IDEC. Demi plays a privileged princess of some random ass country and has to hide out in the States with tomboy Selena in rural Louisiana.  I remember thinking the casting was weird, bc obvi Selena would be the princess, but I guess it worked out. They just need to be BFFs for life.