I’m not much of a horror movie person. I would rather see all the rom-coms in existence (ranging from Hallmark Channel to When Harry Met Sally) than sit through a marathon of Friday the 13th movies. It’s not particularly because it’s scary, but because I don’t find the appeal in watching someone get bludgeoned to death with like a knife or a chainsaw.
The first movie I remember ever thinking was truly frightening was The Sixth Sense, because that was the paranormal factor yet ‘realistic’ side to it that freaked me out when I was just 13. Movies that aren’t necessarily considered horror – that are more psychologically scary are waayyy more horrific than any Mike Meyers type film. Here’s my list of scary non-scary movies that actually make me lost my shit.
Gravity
So I saw the trailer for this in the movie theater and IMMEDIATELY said ‘NOPE’ outloud. But then a couple weeks ago, it finally came out and the buzz was through the roof. No one said anything about the plot, or the outcome , just that it was amazing and would blow your mind.
Because I sometimes cave to peer pressure, I finally saw it. And holy shit was everyone right. There is no way to accurately describe the feeling you have throughout and after watching this movie, other than it affects you. Emotionally, physically – it makes you feel something that I’ve never felt before. The only thing I can kind of compare it to is after I saw Inception, I legit had to sit in my seat until they kicked us out because I didn’t know what to do with myself (slash I wanted to know if the top fell or not). It’s like Inception but 10 times worse/better.
There were definitely parts where the anxiety level was high, and seeing Sandra Bullock and George Clooney dangle in space was absolutely horrifying. But it reminds you that we are just a small part of this entire galaxy, and maybe that’s the most frightening part of it all.
Requiem for a Dream
I was introduced to this film my freshman year of college in one of my writing classes (liberal arts school = a writing class where my final paper was about Studio 54 and Macaulay Culkin’s Party Monster). Now I don’t do drugs, but after watching this film there was no way in hell I was ever going to start. The way Darren Aronofsky makes you feel like you’re actually doing drugs with them was plenty enough for me to feel like I was high too. The close up cinematography of the drugs themselves was a startling reminder of what you’re actually dealing with – and not to mention I think Breaking Bad may have taken a page out of Aronofsky’s book.
And the music? Yeah, if I hear the first few notes of Lux Aeterna, it takes me to a place in my mind I never want to be. Bitches be crazy on drugs, y’all.
Contagion
To be completely honest, the idea of Contagion sounded so scary to me that I couldn’t even watch the movie. I’m just putting it on here because it sounds like the worst possible thing that could feasibly happen to the citizens of the world. It hits too close too home and I don’t like it one bit. This is why I don’t like going out – people can catch things.
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
At first glance, this is a fun children’s movie, right? WRONG. As much as I love this movie, let’s be real. What kind of creepy old man, who hasn’t been seen in years, has a contest to invite kids into his sketchy chocolate factory, which is all really a test to see who would become his rightful heir? And come on – this scene alone? Why did we let kids watch this movie?!?
Black Swan
Going in to Black Swan, I really didn’t think it was going to be as creepy and unsettling as it actually was. But leave it up to Darren Aronofsky once again to freak your bean. Remember the part with the feathers? Yeah, that still haunts me to this day.
Fantasia
Hands down, the weirdest Disney film ever. I remember seeing this in the theater with my parents and falling asleep, but I think it was really because I subconsciously didn’t want my innocent eyes to see the ecstasy trip that was happening on screen. Honestly, if I did drugs (which again, thank Requiem for that), it would probably be a much better film? IDK though guys, it still doesn’t make sense to me and I imagine that that’s what Disney hell looks like.
BONUS:
Unsolved Mysteries
Don’t tell me this theme song alone didn’t make you want to run into a corner and cry. I would make my parents change the channel anytime it accidentally came on because it was THAT frightening… I really shouldn’t have been watching so much television as a kid…
Please note: Tween Nazis doesn’t refer to young folks between the ages of 10 and 12 years old, who grew up following the leadership of Adolf Hitler. I am absolutely not doing a where are they now on them. No, the tween Nazis I’m referring to is the young singing duo of Prussian Blue.
Prussian Blue consists of twin sisters Lamb and Lynx Gaede, who rose to popularity in 2003 as being the bright, blonde, blue-eyed girls who sang white nationalist pop. What, you weren’t into them? For some reason, I remember Molly and I being fascinated with these girls, mainly because we couldn’t believe they existed in real life.
For a little backstory, the twins were born Bakersfield, California and raised by parents April and Bill Gaede. Their mom was even a member of racist fringe groups including the National Alliance and the National Vanguard.
The girls began to write songs and learn how to play instruments, penning songs like “Hitler Is Our Hero” and “Aryan Man Awake”. They recorded two albums and even toured Europe, performing at white nationalist organizations. They even went on to say that they believed the Holocaust was a “myth,” and in fact, the name Prussian Blue refers to the by-product of the poisonous substance used to gas Jews in concentration camps. Classy kids, these two.
Their story was even transformed into a musical a few years ago called White Noise, a project even Whoopi Goldberg backed. While it didn’t find the steam to take it all the way to Broadway, one thing for sure is that Prussian Blue became the talk of newsmagazines across every major network, as these two ‘cherubic’ girls were being used to perpetuate white supremacist propaganda.
To give you a taste of their music, here’s a song called Victory Day. I really hate to give this video more views, but I feel like I need to give y’all proof that these girls were for real.
Anyone else offended by the fact that they became popular – but actually have horrible voices? I mean like, racism aside?
So where are these gals now, you ask? Are they still touring Europe with their inspirational songs?
Thank God, the answer is no. This is Lamb and Lynx Gaede today:
Total hipsters.
Now 21 years old, the girls moved from California to Montana (apparently their mom wanted to move to a more white state). As of 2011, Lamb and Lynx put their hate pop careers behind them, insisting they don’t believe in the messages they used to sing about anymore.
In an interview in 2011, Lynx tried to explain why they got into the business in the first place, saying, “My sister and I were home-schooled. We were these country bumpkins. We spent most of our days up on the hill playing with our goats.”
Lamb adds, “I was just spouting a lot of knowledge that I had no idea what I was saying.”
So take note kids, if you want to become semi-successful in a very niche music market, just do what you’re told and don’t ask questions, even if they seem like they could be extremely offensive.
They both live in Montana still, with Lamb living on her own and working as a hotel maid, and Lynx lives with their mother, stepdad and half-sister, Dresden (the names of these children, good lord) in a home near Lamb. As a freshman in high school, Lynx was diagnosed with cancer and a large tumor was removed from her shoulder. She also suffers from a rare condition called CVS, Cyclic Vomiting Syndrome, which sounds like the most horrible disease in the world.
Unfortunately Lamb has suffered from a few health problems as well, including scoliosis and chronic back pain, as well as lack of appetite and emotional stress… wonder where that came from.
But the one thing that helps them get through the day? Pot. Yes, you read that right.
Lynx reveals, “I have to say, marijuana saved my life. I would probably be dead if I didn’t have it.”
In fact, the two made more history as they became one of the first five minors to get a medical marijuana card in Montana. What a great fun fact to use when forced to play icebreaker games in college.
Speaking of which, they still hope to enroll in college, and are on a mission to make medical marijuana legal all across the U.S. Meanwhile, they’re still keeping their artistic juices flowing, with painting and for Lynx, restoring old furniture.
While their mom believes their mild music stardom was just going to be “a little fun thing to do,” and the twins don’t exactly believe every wold they used to sing, they still have some traces of white supremacy in their ideology.
When asked about their outlook on the Holocaust now, Lynx replied, “I think certain things happened. I think a lot of the stories got misconstrued. I mean, yeah, Hitler wasn’t the best, but Stalin wasn’t, Churchill wasn’t. I disagree with everybody at that time.”
Lamb agreed with her sister and said, “I just think everyone needs to frickin’ get over it. That’s what I think. We just want to come from a place of love and light. I think we’re meant to do something more – we’re healers. We just want to exert the most love and positivity we can.”
“I want to be around people that do things. I don’t want to be around people anymore that judge or talk about what people do. I want to be around people that dream and support and do things.” – our patron saint Amy Poehler {x}
In about two weeks, I will be flying off to Miami, boarding a Carnival cruise, and shipping off to the Bahamas.
Oh, and BTW, it’s a cruise with the Backstreet Boys. Yes, you read that right. It’s one of those cruises that celebrities do to engage with their fans in a different way. these things are becoming more and more common, with everything from a Dancing with the Stars cruise to a Broadway Legends cruise, all going to some island in the Caribbean with hundreds of people willing to pay money to hang out with their favorite celebrities.
Top Chef stars were actually on the boat, not floating around it…
If you’ve been a reader of this blog for a while or even know me irl you know that my love for BSB isn’t new. This has been an interest of mine for the past 18 years. But it’s only been over the past year or so that I’ve really owned up to it.
I basically attribute this to the fact that as I get older, I just don’t give a fuck what people think anymore. I mean that in the not caring about the negatives way, not in the constructive criticism way. I appreciate the latter. As I was growing up, I wouldn’t say I necessarily touted the fact I was a huge BSB/pop music fan, but I also wasn’t hiding it. I felt that if I showed it off too much, there would inevitably be that one person to make fun of me and my teenage self confidence would be forever broken. Obviously, to this day, it’s still not considered “cool” to like BSB, boy bands or even pop music in general, especially years after their height of fame.
But now I don’t care anymore. What it really comes down to for me now is why do we judge people’s interest in the first place?
Think of it this way: what is your guilty pleasure? Honey Boo Boo? Housewives? That one song by Katy Perry?
Now ask yourself: why is this “guilty” at all?
Because the professional critics pan it? Because it may be popular but it’s not contributing anything to society? Because it’s simply not “cool” to like it?
Why do we even care? Why are we even judging others in the first place? We spend too much time worrying about others when all we really need to do is worry about ourselves and how we’re living our best lives. Why keep apologizing or living with shame when we could be more confident and comfortable with who we really are? Why does it matter if your neighbor is a One Direction fan – I mean it would matter if they’re a 50 year old woman who’s legit stalking them and collecting enough memorabilia to be on an episode of Hoarders, in which case you should probably call the police or something.
We should never feel guilty over something that brings us joy to our lives. Just because I like the Backstreet Boys and obsess over Pretty Little Liars theories, it doesn’t mean I don’t know the correct way to pronounce John “Boehner” or what country Bashar Al-Assad is the President of.
A couple of my friends and I were talking about this the other day, and I brought up how my boss at work found out that I was going on this cruise, and the first time he asked me about it, there was this sense of ‘I’m judging you right now’ in his voice. This is a 40-something year old man who is mainly into punk rock. But because my boss and I aren’t really friends and hang out and have deep conversations with each other, me liking BSB is really the only thing he knows about me. He was writing a story about Nick Carter and his fiancee and asked me if I “had a voodoo doll of her in my room”…. The answer is no, for all those wondering. But his comment really irked me. Of course I don’t have a voodoo doll of this celebrity’s fiancee because I am not crazy nor a delusional 12 year old who thinks that I still have a chance at romancing him. Plus I’m an AJ girl anyways.
There’s a scene in Runaway Bride with Julia Roberts who doesn’t have a favorite way to take her eggs. Richard Gere’s character points out that with all her past boyfriends/fiances, she’s always deemed her favorite type of egg with whatever her significant other liked. Priest Brian liked scrambled, so she did too. Bug Guy liked poached and poached was her fave too. And spoiler alert: towards the end of the movie she ventures off to find out which one she likes the best because she likes it- not because she’s influenced by someone else.
As I get older, I have a greater sense of what I like, what kind of people I want to surround myself with -exactly how I like my eggs. Life’s too short to focus on the negative or live a life fearing what others think of you. If it’s not helping others, it’s certainly not helping you, so just distance yourself from the negative bullshit, the peer pressure, the crowd mentality. Think for yourself and no one else.
Attention kids girls of the 90s: LISA FRANK IS A REAL PERSON. AND SHE HAS A FACTORY IN TUSCON, ARIZONA.
And that factory, which used to be a bustling mecca for young girls who only dreamt in technicolor, is now a concrete mirage in the middle of the desert with only six employees.
But over the years, LF slowly became items you would wax nostalgic, partly because there were other designs that became more popular and partly because we reached college and didn’t (necessarily) need her assistance anymore.
Last year, Urban Outfitters deemed it ‘vintage’ enough to bring it back to life, and reintroduced a bunch of LF items into their stores. From t-shirts to folders, to notepads and stickers, the hipster company showed a whole new generation of kids how cool this company was – is.
They even visited the factory for a behind the scenes look at the headquarters, but for some odd reason, Lisa wanted to keep some form of anonymity…
So after watching this, I was a little confused, uncomfortable, disappointed in what I just saw. First of all, Lisa is a self-professed ‘lunatic.’ Okay. Second, LF designs make me feel happy, upbeat, euphoria in a sense that I imagine only users of acid or ‘molly’ feel. This factory seemed stark, cold, perhaps even under some insane dictatorship to Frank herself. The whole thing was unsettling.
Upon doing more research (and reading the most depressing article ever), I discovered that this was not always the case. Back in its heyday, the company employed around 350 people. And it went down to six over the course of a year. LF fans who traveled to Tuscon just to see the inside of this ‘magical place’ could even go on a tour of the factory – until about a year and a half ago. There isn’t even a receptionist in the lobby to great you with rainbows and butterflies – only a telephone with instructions that will direct you to an actual human being.
Lisa Frank herself, in 2003, still with a smile on her face, still allowing people to see her face.
Apparently, most of this downfall stemmed from Lisa’s divorce from her husband/co-business partner in 2005. She sued him, and a series of other legal problems hit her in the following years. Unfortunately, it’s still ongoing, but Lisa is still standing with her company.
It’s obviously a sad turn for a company I revered as a staple of our generation’s childhood, but of course this story is all too common with organizations with ‘fad’ items such as these. But who knows. Everything that is old becomes new again, right? Lisa Frank always seemed like a positive company to me, so why not keep looking at it that way? Maybe there’s still a glimmer of hope that those factory doors will open once more, and we can show our kids just how cool those tap dancing bears and golden retrievers were, not just when we were growing up – but for their childhoods too.
For me, summer isn’t just about basking in the sun, vacations and 90 degree days. It’s the perfect time to get caught up on the TV series that I have been meaning to watch but don’t have time to during the regular TV season. So this is the list I made for myself this summer:
I’d like to point out that American Dreams was a rewatch and I actually decided to watch all four seasons of The League over It’s Always Sunny, purely because there were far less episodes. I mean, get a life.
Scandal was one of those, ‘I’ll watch it if I get around to it’, not one of those ‘I need to see this immediately because it’s literally been called the best series in the history of TV’. So color me surprised when I actually found myself not only liking Scandal, but becoming obsessed with it.
Now I’m not a newcomer to Shondaland, I’ve been with the kids at Seattle Grace since they were interns, and I just realized that I called it Seattle Grace, when it’s actually called Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital (RIP), an I’ve seen the folks over at Oceanside Wellness with my boo Taye Diggs. So I’m well aware of the addictive TV crack Shonda Rhimes stirs into her beloved shows. But I didn’t expect it to be this good.
Scandal begins its highly-anticipated third season TONIGHT, and I’m here to tell you that if you haven’t spent the summer (read: one week) catching up on the past 29 episodes, you’ve wasted your time. But – it’s never too late. Here are 5 reasons why you should start DVR-ing the third season now, and after reading this post, go directly to Netflix and watch the first two seasons. I’m telling you – it’s that good.
Before we start, here’s the basic plot:
Meet Olivia Pope, played by Kerry Washington. Former White House Director of Communications, overall HBIC.
She also exists on a diet of wine and popcorn.
She runs Olivia Pope & Associates, a crisis management firm that handles major scandals in Washington, D.C. and fixes them. Her team is comprised of her ‘Gladiators’ (which is also the nickname for Scandal fans): Harrison, Huck, Abby and Quinn.
Meet President Fitzgerald Grant. Leader of the free world, sexy grown ass man, former Ghost villain.
He is married to another HBIC in her own right, First lady Mellie Grant. Fitz’s right-hand man and Chief of Staff is Cyrus Beene, a guy who is willing to do anything to keep the President the President, and probs the best actor on the show.
Other people of note: US Attorney for D.C., David Rosen (played by The West Wing’s Josh Malina), White House Reporter/Cyrus’ husband, James Novack (Emmy winner Dan Bucatinsky), and Officer Jake Ballard (Felicity’s other Ben, Scott Foley), who I won’t reveal his exact role in the show.
Oh BTW, Olivia and Fitz have been carrying on an affair ever since they met on his campaign trail, and have been off and on while he’s been in the White House. So you know, probably the biggest SCANDAL there is.
So wrong, it’s right.
If the basic plot wasn’t enough to convince you, here are 5 reasons to indulge in your next guilty pleasure:
5) Social Media
There’s a reason why I hashtagged ‘Scandal’ in the Post title. Scandal started as a midseason replacement last year. With only seven episodes, it still found a fan base, and was renewed for a second season. It seemed that with every passing week, it became bigger and bigger, and ABC execs finally decided to give it a full 22 episode season.
And a lot of its popularity is thanks to social media and word of mouth. I remember seeing it pop up more and more among the people I was following both on Twitter and Facebook, and it was the reason why I put it on my list in the first place. Since the show itself is highly addictive, people wanted to share their addiction with everyone else, and of course, in 2013, what better way to do that than with the internet?
Apparently Kerry went to Shonda and suggested that the cast join Twitter (because she didn’t want to seem controlling over them!) and soon they began livetweeting along with their fans. Thursday nights became an event. If you couldn’t watch it in real time, don’t bother going on Twitter. It became a worldwide trend every week thanks to the #Gladiators, giving it even more free publicity than ever before. Between January and June of this year, almost 3.5 million tweets were sent about the show alone!
Now it’s come to the point where the cast gets together before the next episode airs and watches it together in order to prep for the live tweeting on Thursday. And let’s be honest, watching your favorite show along with the cast and other fans is pretty cool. So I’m warning you now, if you see #Scandal, #Gladiators, #TheStormIsComing or #Olitz trending on Twitter tonight, you’ll know why.
4) Fashion
Olivia Pope is a classy broad. A classy D.C. broad who makes thousands of dollars, and she lets her strong fashion sense be a reflection of her own strong character as a woman. Costume Desginer Lyn Paolo is the creative genius behind Olivia’s wardrobe, who picks the best of the best for Olivia. From Burberry capes to Dior evening coats to my personal fave, a Jean Fares gown that would even make me want to have an affair with Olivia (slash Kerry).
Fans have been dying over her style so much that Paolo and Scandal bosses partnered with Saks Fifth Avenue, and just yesterday, Kerry helped kickoff the collaboration at its flagship store in New York City. The famous window is curated by Paolo herself, which includes fashions are worn by Olivia, including Giorgio Armani, Donna Karan, Calvin Klein, Michael Kors and Carolina Herrera.
fyi, that is supposed to be kerry washington and tony goldwyn
3) Cast Camaraderie
Nothing makes my TV obsessed heart happier knowing that people on TV who play friends are actually friends IRL. And although there’s a lot of drama on screen, it doesn’t seem like there’s any drama off screen.
Like I mentioned before, the cast gets together at someone’s home the Sunday before the show airs, so they can watch the ep together for the first time in order to prepare for the live tweeting. And they post pix on Twitter of their gatherings (as seen above)! If you delve into the black hole of Scandal interviews on YouTube, you can clearly tell that they all really enjoy each others’ company, and even hang out when not on set.
They remind me of the Parks and Rec cast, which I think is probably the set I’d most like to hang out at, for many reasons, but mainly because it seems like they’re just friends tooling around, who happen to be filming a TV show together. That’s what Scandal is like.
2) Characters first, adjectives second
Shonda Rhimes is known for her “colorblind” casting. You can see it with Grey’s and you can see it on Scandal. Despite the fact that Olivia Pope is the first African-American lead actress on TV in a very long time, that’s not what she’s all about. She’s a powerful, confident woman first, and black woman second. In fact, her interracial relationship with Fitz isn’t even mentioned until halfway through season two, as seen in the clip above. Earlier in the episode, an angry Liv scolded Fitz for treating her like a Sally Hemmings to his Thomas Jefferson. In fact, race has only been mentioned a couple times throughout the series, and that’s really what it should be.
Also take Cyrus, a high-powered Republican who just happens to be gay. Just like Olivia, he isn’t defined by his sexuality. He’s defined by his ability, his fortitude, his passion and allegiance for his country, for the President.
Scandal proves that a TV show can have a diverse palate of characters, without them being the stereotypical “gay best friend,” or “sassy black girl.” They are just Cyrus and Olivia.
1) OLITZ
While my second reason on the list should be enough, let’s keep it real. The making of a really good drama/soap/Shonda Rhimes show is a hot relationship. And save for maybe Sam and Naomi from Private Practice, this is absolutely the hottest relationship to come out of Shondaland. Not only are Kerry and Tony extremely hot on their own, but they have an inexplicable chemistry that makes you feel like you’re being a voyeur into their sex lives. Seriously, just YouTube some of their scenes together if you want a sampling, but I’m telling you it’s hot hot hot! The clip above is from the pilot, where we first discover they’re having an affair. It gets sooo much hotter!)
Although I suppose the other thing that makes their love even hotter is that they’re divulging in forbidden territory. I think it’s easy for viewing to forget the onnneee little detail about “Olitz”: these two are committing adultery. We are rooting for CHEATERS. Well, a lot of us.
But I think that that’s amazing that a series can make us support people who we would otherwise judge in the outside world. Obviously no one is perfect, but the very thing that has most people tuning in is considered taboo in real life. What is right? What is wrong? Is it wrong because he’s married, or is it wrong because he’s forcing himself to stay in a relationship where his wife isn’t at the top of his list anymore? Would it be right to leave the First Lady and become the ‘Divorced President’, or just keep up the facade for the American public, knowing full well you’re living a lie?
As we’re about to delve into season there, we still haven’t figured out right from wrong, whether the Olitz relationship can still be strong or not, but one thing for sure is that if they’re gettin down dirty in the White House – we’ll be the pervs watching…
Scandal is on ABC, Thursdays at 10pm (No, I do not work for ABC or Scandal, I’m just insane)
You know them, you had them, you hated them – Beanie Babies were a craze in the 90s, selling out in Hallmark and toys stores around the world in hopes that one day, they would be a gold mine. At least that’s what the original point of them was. Today, no one really cares about them anymore.
Ironically last month, Ty Warner, the creator of the 90s craze of stuffed animals, was charged with – dun dun dunnnnn – tax evasion. He allegedly kept $93 million in a secret offshore account at the United Bank of Switzerland (because, neutrality?) between 1996 and 2002, at the height of Beanie Baby popularity. In 2002, he failed to pay upwards of $1.2 million owed on the $3.1 million in income made through investments in the Swiss account. The guy has to pay more than $53 million in civil penalties and could also be in the clinker for a max of five years.
Welp. Looks like the Beanie Babies creator isn’t a billionaire like he thought he would be. And neither are the owners of hundreds of BB who had hoped they would be worth a fortune in the future. Now people are just trying to get rid of the damn things that are taking up too much space in their kids’ rooms. Mama just wants a new home gym, amirite ladies?
I am totally guilty of having a collection of these cute critters, and even had one of those books that listed all the available beanies, and I would check them off as I added them to my plethora of furry friends. I have no idea where they are now or what my mother has done with them, but I do know that I cannot be the only one who has a handful of these stored in my parents’ house.
In fact, there are people who are willing to let go of these items that still, one day, could be worth thousands of dollars (jk, these will never be worth anything frreal). Here are a few collectibles I found on eBay. Just try and guess how much these folks are selling them for. Whether it be too high or too low, either way, these things are too ridiculous for anyone to purchase at all.
CHOCOLATE THE MOOSE
(highlight the space between the arrows or click on the pic for the actual price!)
>>> $1.98 <<<
FLUTTER THE BUTTERFLY
“This is very desirable & sought after TY Beanie Baby. It has a 3rd Gen hang tag & a 2nd Gen tush tag. It is Mint with 99% mint hang tag. ” A lot of lingo to say ‘good condition’
>>> $89.89 <<<
Teddy with Old Face
Is it me, or is this bear squatting and crossing his legs??
>>>$149.00<<<
Scorch
>>>$1.99 <<<
Eucalyptus the Koala
>>>$19.99 <<<
Erin
AKA the Irish bear. Apparently she’s extremely rare. Complete with Guiness in hand (not really, but they should)
>>>$350.00<<<
Nibbles the Guinea Pig
No parent should ever purchase this for their child. What even IS this monstrosity??
>>>$29.99<<<
Digger the Orange Crab
>>>$14.99<<<
Pinata the Bear
Because apparently, they made an international collection. and weren’t even clever about it. ‘Let’s just print a pattern of their flag on it!’, the now jobless designers of Beanie Babies, circa 1998
>>> $4.00<<<
And now it’s time to guess which one of these RARE Princess Diana bears costs more than the other!
It seems like just yesterday we were introduced to Chemistry teach Mr. Walter White and his ex-student Jesse Pinkman, who became entrepreneurs with their booming meth business. And for some of you, it was like yesterday if you’re of the late-to-the-party-binge-watching ilk. And this weekend, it all comes crashing down to an anxiety-ridden end. Will Jesse die? What will happen to Skyler, Walt Jr. Flynn & Holly? Will Todd kill any more people? Who will Walt use the Ricin on? Will anyone in ABQ ever have an A1 day?
While we anticipate Sunday’s series finale, I decided to take a look at some of my personal favorite series finales. To be clear, I only considered shows I’ve seen from beginning to end, so don’t complain that The Sopranos finale isn’t on here because I’ve never seen it. Buuut I would like to hear what your favorite series finales are! And then at approx 10:16pm on Sunday, we can all add Breaking Bad to that list and cry together knowing there will never be a new episode of one of the greatest TV shows ever again.
(In chronological order) ((Also, spoiler alert??))
Friends (1994-2004)
Besides being one of the most legendary sitcoms in TV history, Friends also has a special place in my heart as well. It was the first show that I ever became obsessed with – to the point where I wore out the VHS tapes I used to tape every episode on. I went through the seasons multiple times, reference it daily, held day long marathons called ‘Friends-travaganzas’ and it even had some influence on this very blog (In high school, Molly & I made a bet on who we thought the father of Rachel’s baby was going to be, and the winner had to buy the loser our cafeteria’s famous cookies. We both lost.)
That being said, as a fan of a series for 10 years, you want the last episode to wrap up everything in a nice package with a perfect bow. You want the best for the people/characters you’ve spent the past 10 years laughing with. And the finale did just that. Monica and Chandler finally got the family they desperately wanted, Phoebe was also able to find a family she never really hard growing up with her husband Mike, and after their epic on-again, off-again relationship, Rachel got off the plane and promised that ‘this was it’ with Ross and they could build upon their own family too (My only qualm is that Joey still didn’t end up with anyone, even if it was because of the awful spin-off).
Co-creator David Crane has said that he and Marta Kaufmann were inspired to write about their own lives, living in NYC in their 20s. They pitched the show as such: “It’s about searching for love and commitment and security, and the fear of love and commitment and security. It’s about friendship – because when you’re young and single in the city, your friends are your family.” And in the end, all the characters achieved and surpassed that. The finale was like a graduation for the gang, even though they spent pretty much the past 10 years relying on each other, the end of the series signified that their friends weren’t the ‘ultimate family’ anymore. It was time to go make their own.
Six Feet Under (2001-2005)
I binge-watched Six Feet Under last year, and even though I found it too dark for my taste at times, overall it lived up to its hype. Not only that, but the finale was everything that people said it would be. Seriously, just watch SFU for the finale alone. Don’t worry, I won’t spoil anything, but the last montage ^AS SEEN ABOVE, SO DON’T WATCH IT IF YOU PLAN ON WATCHING IT IN THE FUTURE^^ is the best, most genius, satisfying ending I’ve ever seen. I honestly can’t even talk about it because it is that good.
Friday Night Lights (2006-2011)
Much like Six Feet Under, I was a little late to the Friday Night Lights game – and I’m assuming most of its fans are. Right after the series finale aired in May, the entire show was available on Netflix Instant – a moment I had been waiting for for years! I spent the summer (ok, like a month and a half) of 2011 bonding with Netflix, the Taylors and Tim Riggins abs. It was one of those instances where all I could think about was the Panthers. I would be at work just dreaming about what would happen next, and rushing home to watch the next episode.
But when it came down to the final season, I had mixed feelings. I wanted to know what happened to the gang, but absolutely did not want it to end. The problem was that I watched it so fast that five years of drama in Dillon was condensed into just a few weeks – but it was there. The bond I had with the team was there. It literally took me almost as long to watch the final five episodes, particularly the finale, than it did to watch the whole thing. But when it did, it was perfect. Stories were tied up, characters found their happy endings, and Mr. and Mrs. Coach were still the perfect role models they were from the pilot. Clear eyes. Full Hearts…
30 Rock (2006-2013)
There’s a reason why 30 Rock has won 16 Emmy Awards – it’s just that good. It’s a rare breed of show that has been able to be intelligent, biting, sentimental and most importantly funny throughout the seven seasons on air. The combination of the final three episodes was incredibly fulfilling for all 30 Rock fans, as the show highlighted everything we loved about it in the first place. Liz dealing with the ragtag group of writers, Jenna vying for attention, and Kenneth, well Kenneth ends up exactly where he was meant to be all along.
The Office (2005-2013)
Add The Office right next to Friends, because this show is one of my all-time favorites. Now I admit that the show kind of lagged towards the end of its run, but I maintain that it was still funnier than most shows on TV at the time. In my opinion, NBC landed the jackpot with smart comedies like 30 Rock, Parks and Rec, Community, and of course, The Office. Executive Producer Greg Daniels proved that he could not only adopt the UK version, but alter it to fancy American audiences and make it last twice as long as its namesake.
For me, The Office blended that perfect mix of comedy with heart, that only few shows have been able to master. The perfect example of this is in the boss himself, Michael Scott. He may have done asinine things like almost commit suicide in order to show the risks of depression and suicide, or hold a funeral for a bird in order to cope with the death of a former co-worker or organize the ‘Michael Scott’s Dunder Mifflin Scranton Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race For The Cure’. When you whittle it down, he does all these things because he cares. He cares about his employees, the people who became his friends, and ultimately his family.
The entire Dunder Mifflin Scranton branch may have been filled with shenanigans, feuds, intertwining relationships but as seen in the series finale, they all went through the documentary together – as a family. Not to be a broken record, but the show came full circle – from Angela and Dwight, to Michael’s surprise appearance and That’s What She Said moment, to Jim and Pam finally getting to courage to do what they wanted- get out of the rut they were in in Scranton. In honestly couldn’t have ended any better (and if we’re speaking honestly here, I’d say it’s my number one finale in this whole list). It was so good in fact, that I still haven’t been able to get myself to watch an entire episode of The Office since – I couldn’t even make it through the first 10 seconds of this video without crying…. I might have a problem.
BONUS:
ER (1994-2009)
Alright, I admit, I’ve probably only seen 10 out of the 15 seasons of ER, give or take a few episodes throughout the last five. But come on, 15 seasons is one hell of a commitment. The cast changes, writers and executive producers come and go, but through the heart of it all, it was always about these doctors, and their relationships with their patients and each other.
Clearly the heyday of ER was towards the beginning, when Noah Wyle, Anthony Edwards, Juliana Margulies and some guy named George Clooney started off as regular folk on a medical TV drama. It was really nothing like TV had seen before, and became a critically acclaimed hit, essentially paving the way for Shondaland and Grey’s to leave its own mark on TV. And while it may have stumbled towards the end, the finale was purposefully (and wonderfully) mirrored the pilot, a full circle maneuver that I personally enjoy in any series.
For me, the most poignant part of the finale was seeing Rachel Greene, daughter of the hospital’s late Dr. Mark Greene, come back to County General in hopes to follow in the footsteps of her revered father. In the early seasons, viewers saw Rachel as a kid wandering around the ER aimlessly, but now she had a purpose. The end scene (as seen above), may not be too flashy, but it’s a reminder that even if we don’t get to see what happens in this hospital for another 15 years, it will keep on going without us.
In 1993, the men of Bayside High left Mr. Belding behind and continued on to higher education by attending California University. Now if they were real, which in all honesty they sometimes are in my head, Zack Morris, AC Slater and Samuel ‘Screech’ Powers kicked off their journey exactly 20 years ago this week. “20 YEARS?!”, you say? Yeah. 20 years. 1993 was 20 years ago, and 2003 was 10 years ago, a fact that I always always fail to believe.
Just like real life, Saved by the Bell (the high school era) ended in May, and months later, the crew started college in September and while the constant repeats made us believe this iteration ran on for approx 2 seasons, it actually only ran for 19 episodes. That’s 19 episodes for young, impressionable kids to find out what college life is like through a fake TV show. Seriously, I didn’t know anyone in college at the time, so what I saw on SBTB was what I assumed college (and high school for that matter) was going to be like.
Of course, now I know that it wasn’t really supposed to be treated as a college bible.
Expectation:
All your best friends will go to the same college as you.
Not only will your gang ALL be accepted into the same school, but you will all decide to go there TOGETHER.
Reality:
You will go to college alone.
If you’re lucky, you’ll have a buddy or two. Otherwise, man up and find new friends.
Expectation:
You will share a spacious triple and suite with your roommates
Reality:
You will be crammed into a double with a stranger
Robin Scherbatsky’s cubicle is roughly the size of a normal college dorm room.
Expectation:
You will meet a dreamy boyfriend/girlfriend – and that person will be your professor
Oh Professor Lasky. He was a handsome, single dad who crossed the line with his student/babysitter. At least you’re the reason Kelly decided to finally tie the knot with Zack.
Reality:
You will date randoms and half of them will probably be gay
That’s what college is for, right?
Expectation:
You will be forced to join a sorority/fraternity and undergo a ridiculous hazing process
And that hazing process will include Nickelodeon slime and a frat leader who is actually the younger version of Billy Chambers from Scandal.
Reality:
You don’t have to join Greek Life at all
Nothing against Greek Life, but if you’re like me and are too lazy and poor to join an organized group of friends, this will be a relief.
Expectation:
You will be able to redecorate anything and everything in your dorm
And your suite (which connects the boys room to the girls room) will be big enough for a poker table in the living room.
Reality:
No tacks, staples, tape on the walls, no microwave, no hot plate, no fridge, and absolutely no room for anything.
In reality, not a big deal. But still annoying.
Expectation:
Turning a dorm room into a rave will be super easy and fun and include stolen nitrous oxide from the science department
Painting the walls black will be a breeze! And all these people in a small area won’t break any RA-set sound ordinances or anything.
Reality:
You won’t even go to rave, just a bunch of house parties in dingy apartments/basements, fill your red solo cups with indiscernable types of alcohol
Honestly, all part of the college experience and worth the vomiting for the anecdotes
Expectation:
You will befriend a lab monkey who later escapes but then comes back
This was an actual plot line. And that chimp is actually wearing a dress.
Reality:
No monkeys. No monkeys at all.
Thank God. Although it sounds kinda fun, no? Yeah, no.
New York City was abuzz with fashionistas last week, as the world’s best and brightest designers gathered in the Big Apple to show off their collections for Spring 2014. A lot of eyes are on the models that walk the runways, but it was also a time for celebrities to grab a front row seat at their favorite designers’ shows and prove that they care about clothes as much as the fashion editors sitting next to them. Not to mention that front row at a Fashion Week is usually the best time to see celebs together that you normally would in the outside world. For example, this picture from the Burberry show during Paris Fashion Week 2012:
(A confused) Aaron Paul, Dita Von Teese, Harry Styles, Dev Patel and Harvey Weinstein. Or, the next Ocean’s 14.
Here’s some of the best stars that were (sometimes uncomfortably) sitting in the coveted seats and the clothes that were modeled before them.
Alexander Wang: Terry Richardson, a girl who might be Zoe Kravitz, Kanye and Miguel
Herve Leger: Nicki Minaj taking a selfie instead of watching the runway show…
Y-3: Tunic wearing ex-boyfriend of Selena Gomez sporting a ‘mustache’
Richard Chai: Zachary Quinto as the fourth (actually fifth) Jonas Brother?
Opening Ceremony: RiRi, her bff Melissa Forde, Miguel and the beautiful rule breaking moth Ann Perkins/Rashida Jones (aka the bench i would most like to sit on)
Tadashi Shoji: The moment when a 15 year old is older than a 40-year-old Alyssa Milano
Alicia Keys, Anna Wintour and Maria Sharpova
Victoria Beckham: Mr. Beckham, the real princess of the UK and Anna Wintour actually showing some human emotion
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! No, I’m not talking about Christmas, it’s the glorious return of television after the fall hiatus! While our favorite shows are returning, lest we forget there is a whole new crop of shows just dying to be kept alive by network execs.
In television history, this time of year determines who will have a job at the end of the season and who will not. Some are bad, some are great, some are bad but go on for multiple seasons (Two and a Half Men), some are great but only live on for half a season (RIP Ben and Kate).
But have no fear. We are here to help guide you to the land of good television. Who knows if these shows will be the last ones standing, but at least you’ll waste your time on good shows instead of the bad ones. Do you have any favorites that are missing from this list?
The Dramas
The Blacklist
Premieres: Monday, September 23rd – NBC – 10pm
Starring: James Spader (Boston Legal, The Office, all around 80s icon), Diego Klattenhoff (Uncle Mike from Homeland, Shane Omen from Mean Girls)
Plot: James Spader plays Red Reddington, one of the FBI’s most wanted. He surprisingly turns himself in and offers to help catch a long-thought-dead terrorist, but he’ll only work with new FBI profiler Liz Keen, played by Megan Boone. This terrorist guy isn’t the only criminal Red can help put behind bars, he has a massive list – a ‘blacklist’ if you will – of other wanted politicians, mobsters, spies and terrorists, but will only help the FBI if Liz continues as his partner.
Why You Should Give It a Shot: Out of all the network shows debuting this fall, The Blacklist tested better than all other 125 NBC drama pilots in the past decade. Better than ER? So this has to be good. Or the pilot, at least.
Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D
Premieres: Tuesday, September 24th – ABC – 8pm
Starring: Clark Gregg (duh, Agent Coulson), Ming-Na Wen (ER, the greatest Disney classic Mulan)
Plot: You may remember Agent Coulson from the Marvel superhero movie franchise, and now he’s getting his on show. Coulson puts together a task force to investigate the growing number of people with superpowers, and that’s pretty much it.
Why You Should Give It a Shot: Because it’s supposed to be the biggest new show this season, and you don’t want to be the guy who has nothing to say around the watercooler the following day. Do people still go to watercoolers?
Masters of Sex
Premieres: Sunday, September 29th – Showtime – 10pm
Starring: Michael Sheen (Frost/Nixon, Wesley Snipes on 30 Rock, ex-boyfriend of Rachel McAdams), Lizzy Caplan (Party Down, Cloverfield, ex-costar of Rachel McAdams)
Plot: Set in the 1950s, this drama centers around William Masters (Sheen) and Virginia Johnson (Caplan) as they take on the risque study of researching the medical side of sex.
Why You Should Give It a Shot: This is the only non-network show on the list, but it seems too good to leave it off. Shows that push the button are always poised to be good TV, but with a cast like this and the perfect mix of drama and comedy, this is definitely one to look out for come awards season.
The Comedies
Trophy Wife
Premieres: Tuesday, September 24th – ABC – 9:30pm
Starring: Bradley Whitford (The West Wing, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, often the center of my dreams), Malin Ackerman (Couples Retreat, Rock of Ages), Marcia Gay Harden (Mystic River, season two resident lawyer on The Newsroom), Michaela Watkins (former SNL cast member)
Plot: Bradley Whitford is on his third wife – the young, reformed party girl Kate (Ackerman). She is thrown into an unconventional family, which includes his first ex-wife Diane (Harden), the hardass doctor with whom he has two teenage kids, and second ex-wife Jackie, a granola/hippie mom with whom he adopted a spunky Asian kid.
Why You Should Give It a Shot: Because Bradley Whitford needs to be on a TV series that is successful again. Also it’s funny. Don’t trust me? (rude) You can watch the pilot on Hulu before it comes on the small screen!
Brooklyn Nine Nine
Premieres: Tuesday, September 17th – FOX- 8:30pm
Starring: Andy Samberg (SNL, Celeste and Jesse Forever, often has Dick in a Box), Andre Braugher (Homicide: Life on the Street), Chelsea Peretti (former Parks & Rec writer, stand up comic, Twitter life ruiner)
Plot: A police workplace comedy featuring carefree cop Jake Peralta (Samberg) who has to work under a new no nonsense boss in Captain Ray Holt (Braugher).
Why You Should Give It a Shot: A show created by Parks and Rec mastermind and The Office’s Mose, Michael Schur and another Parks writer Dan Goor, it’s sure to have a few LOL moments. Basically Schur’s TV forte is getting former SNL cast members and making them stars of their own comedies. It helps that he used to write for SNL too.
Super Fun Night
Premieres: Wednesday, October 2nd – ABC – 9:30pm
Starring: Rebel Wilson (Bridesmaids, Pitch Perfect, all-around hilarious lady), Liz Lapira (Crazy Stupid Love, Don’t Trust The B-, Traffic Light aka shows only I watched)
Plot: Kimmie Boubier (Wilson) is a junior attorney who has had a standing date every Friday with her best friends for the past 13 years. Their motto is “Always together! Always inside!”, which makes me feel like we’re soulmates. But now because of a cute British co-worker and networking opportunities, Kimmie feels the need to actually go out and meet people for once.
Why You Should Give It a Shot: Rebel Wilson. Executive produced by Conan O’Brien. Theoretically this show should be a hit.
Cookies + Sangria 