Hey C+S Book Club-ers! Last time we visited Harriet the Spy, and since we’re ladies in our *late 20s*, our next choice is obviously a little more mature than a kid spy. This time it’s about teenagers.
By now, most of you have heard about or read John Green’s The Fault in Our Stars, a young adult novel about two teens, Hazel Grace Lancaster and Augustus Waters who meet and fall in love. Oh and they both have cancer. I remember reading this for back when it first came out and appropriately crying harder than I have ever cried before. Legit had to stop reading it for a few days because it made me that sad. Now that the movie is coming out today, I can only imagine how that feeling will be magnified thousands of times more once I see it with my eyes. But essentially, TFiOS isn’t supposed to be a sad story, it’s supposed to be a celebration of life, no matter how long or short it is. So with that, here are just a few of the life lessons I gleaned from reading this book – **spoilers ahead** (but you should really read this book and see the movie anyways).
You can’t escape the hurdles
“I wondered if hurdlers ever thought, ‘This would go faster if we just got rid of the hurdles.'”
Hazel & Augustus initially meet in a cancer support group for teens, so a lot of the folks we encounter in the book (save for the parents and hospital staff) have been dealt a rather bad card of hands when it comes to overcoming difficulties in life. But it’s there in front of them, and the only thing to do is try to clear it and get to the next problem. We may face hardships in our life, but we can’t just give up. What would become of us if we didn’t have hardships or hurdles to get over and improve our lives (hopefully) for the better? The things that try to bring us down in the past only make us stronger. And then we can look back and see just what we’ve gone through.
Pain demands to be felt
“That’s the thing about pain – it demands to be felt”
Pain wouldn’t be pain if we didn’t at least feel something when we get hurt. You can’t go on avoiding something that you know is going to hurt you because you don’t want to feel it. If you do, it’s going to get worse and worse, so it’s better to just let it all out. In TFiOS, Augustus’ BFF Isaac has eye cancer, and subsequently has to undergo surgery which leaves him blind. During this time, his girlfriend breaks up with him, and he has so much rage that he just needs to let it all out. Augustus lets Isaac demolish his old basketball trophies in his basement, as if it’s no big deal. Why? Because Isaac needed to let it out. There’s no use of keeping that anger and frustration in. And while it might be gut-wrenching as it happens, that pain needs to be felt – or it will never go away.
Time isn’t good to anyone
“What a slut time is. She screws everybody.”
I can’t tell you how many times over the past few days I’ve said, “HOW IS IT JUNE ALREADY?!?” When we want time to speed up, it seems to slow down. When we want it to slow down, it’s like it’s gone in seconds. Luckily, everyone is a victim of time’s bitter kiss. Both Hazel and Augustus know they don’t have very good chances of staying alive forever, so it’s even more frustrating that they fall in love knowing this devastating fact. But the most they – and we – can do is make the most of our time, and not waste it on things we will regret doing.
Dare to be fearless
“Our fearlessness shall be our secret weapon.”
It’s easier said than done, but a problem I think a lot of people have is not being afraid to jump in and do something out of your comfort zone, no matter the outcome. We worry too much about what’s going to happen next that we don’t think about how great it could be if we even try. For the longest time, Hazel put her feelings about Augustus to the side, and refused to let their friendship turn romantic, as she called herself a “grenade”, ready to explode at any second. She finally put that fear aside and let her guard down, only to experience one of the greatest loves of her life.
Your true self is revealed in the darkest of times
“Grief does not change you, Hazel. It reveals you.”
Like 9/11 or the Boston Marathon, there were the people who ran away from the explosions, then there were the first responders who initial reaction was to run towards the problem to see who they could help. That first gut reaction of how you respond to something tragic and life-changing tells a lot about you as a person. You can either give up, not face the “hurdles”, or you can be strong, live a life – live a better life knowing that whatever caused you grief in the first place has since given you reason to become a better person. When Hazel and Augustus visit the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam, Hazel takes note that Anne’s father, Otto, was the only one out of their family to survive the Holocaust. She says, “I thought about Otto Frank not being a father anymore, left with a diary instead of a wife and two daughters.” Otto eventually decided to publish that diary, and of course it went on to become on of the most revered and studied books from the war. Otto didn’t give up when he was left alone – he preserved their legacy.
You can’t always get what you want
“The world is not a wish granting factory.”
“Cancer perks” are what Hazel and Augustus call the things they’ve received in sympathy for their struggles with cancer, you know the Make-a-Wish type things. Throughout the book, they make it clear that their sickness is not what defines them, it’s just something they have to live with, therefore the cancer perks, while usually cool, ultimately doesn’t give them what they really want. If you do want something, you have to work for it, and if you don’t get it – you don’t get it. Not everything is going to work out in your favor, but the most we can do is try.
A life is still important, no matter how long or how short
“Some infinities are bigger than other infinities.”
Probably one of the most quoted excerpts from the book, this line really sums up the entire story of Hazel and Augustus. Towards the end of the book (again, spoiler alert, I’ve warned you twice!) Augustus dies, another teenager succumbing to that bitch called cancer. While his life may have been short compared to you know, people who live to be 100, he still lived a significant life. The point of the book isn’t to feel sorry for Hazel and Gus, it’s to remind us that a life, no matter how long, or how short, can still make a profound impact on those around you, but it’s our choice as to how we decide to live it.
The 68th annual Tony Awards are this Sunday, which for everyone that isn’t a theater nerd like me, it’s basically our Super Bowl. In fact, I used to attend a Tonys party every year with my friends/co-workers from a theatre and it pretty much was our Super Bowl. I admit, I’m not a super geek like some of my pals, but I’m at a level where I watch videos of Broadway stars online in my spare time (or just, time).
A few years ago along my internet travels, I came across this magic web series called Side by Side by Susan Blackwell. Hosted by – you guessed it – Susan Blackwell, an actress who’s been on TV and film, but most notably in the theater world for her outstanding performance in the musical [title of show]. She recruits her fellow Broadway friends for an interview, but not just any interview, it usually takes place in an odd location and includes some kind of fun activity.
My first introduction to Susan was with this interview with Daniel Radcliffe while he was doing How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying in 2011, and he is legit cleaning her house. Yes, Potterheads, in this video, you see DanRad cleaning a toilet. Seriously. If that’s not enough to get you to watch this then IDK what is.
Actually I do. Susan is charming, hilarious, affable, and has a way to get her interviewees to talk about stuff that not many others can. Oh and she licks her guests on the face. The DanRad vid was a gateway drug into her other Side by Side interviews, so here now are some other standout videos from her collection.
Zachary Quinto
Where: Dog Park
Activity: Watching dogs in a dog park
Highlight: A rousing game of ‘Name That Dog’ and Susan ‘smashing ZQ like a pancake’ on a picnic table
Where: ZQ’s apartment
Activity: Having a sleepover
Highlight: Prank calling Jesse Tyler Ferguson & Smash star Christian Borle
Sutton Foster/Jonathan Groff/Laura Benanti
Where: In Bed/A Horse-Drawn Carriage/Hooters
Activity: Breakfast/Cuddling/Eating Wings
Highlight: Sutton lying in bed with her Tony gown and actual Tony/JGroff singing Left Behind from Spring Awakening/Susan handling Laura’s boobs
Jonathan Groff #2
Where: His parents’ farm in rural Pennsylvania (lit’rally Amish country)
Activity: Chillin in a hayloft, petting some horses and goats
Highlight: JGroff singing a part of Totally Fucked (from Spring Awakening) while shaking a bucket of corn kernels to get the goats to eat
Laura Benanti #2
Where: Ziva Meditation
Activity: Being zen on a couch
Highlight: Playing iPhone roulette and landing on a pic of her former Go On (RIP) co-star taking a nap in her own bosoms
Steven Pasquale
Where: Steven’s apartment
Activity: Using a Vitamix to make super healthy green juices
Highlight: Steven prank calling Taye Diggs and leaving a voicemail as Jim Carrey
Audra McDonald
Where: Great Jones Spa
Activity: Getting massages, drinking cucumber water
Highlight: Audra singing a fantastic version of the Spongebob Squarepants theme song
Norbert Leo Butz
Where: Strand Bookstore
Activity: Sitting in the parenting section
Highlight: Flipping through the pages of a book called Surgery of the Anus, Rectum and Colon
Andrew Rannells
Where: McKittrick Hotel
Activity: Playing with a Ouija board
Highlight: Imitating the pageant hosts on Toddlers and Tiaras
Last week, one of our Man Crush Monday honorees, LeVar Burton, launched a Kickstarter campaign to bring beloved program Reading Rainbow to classrooms for free and to more platforms than just iPads/tablets, helping kids learn to read and build a love for books. In about 10 hours, the initial goal of $2 million was reached, and almost $3.5 MILLION has been donated since it launched less than a week ago – and it doesn’t even end until July 2nd.
When Veronica Mars made history last year by raising $2 million in about 10 hours as well, we thought shows like Gilmore Girls and Buffy would be prime candidates for a Kickstarter campaign. Now with Reading Rainbow making strides, I thought about the other educational shows from our childhood that could possibly make a comeback and return to help a whole other generation of kids too. Here are some of my picks, do you have any that you don’t see on the list?
Wishbone
{Ran from 1995 to 1998}
Kids love a talking animal, so when Jack Russell Terrier Wishbone is a sharp-talking pooch, it’s easy to forget that he’s retelling stories from classic literature. Wishbone takes on the role of the titular character in each story as he plays it out in his daydream, while his owner Joe faces some kind of similar situation IRL. If a crowdfunding campaign was launched for the show, maybe the show could just get a revamp and come back to TV. Is there even a show like this on right now? I’ve lost touch with my children’s programming.
Magic School Bus
{Ran from 1994 to 1997}
So this ‘Inside Ralphie’ episode is, for some reason, the most prominent one stuck in my head, even after all these years. Like, Ms. Frizzle just straight up took the class & their Magic School Bus into his body to figure out why he’s sick. Teacher of the year, y’all. Anyways, I feel like Magic School Bus would be a great app for kids, especially with an episode in this vein (pun intended), where it takes them on a journey into the body.
Bill Nye the Science Guy
{Ran from 1993 to 1998}
It depresses me that there are probably kids out there who only know Bill Nye from his time on Dancing with the Stars. Who do kids have to look up to in the media now if they want to be scientists? Bill Nye focused on a certain subject in science each episode, and if he successfully funded a Kickstarter campaign, he should bring his science show to schools all over the world, making it one of those interactive assemblies where the students get out of class but are really just going into another one.
Mr. Wizard’s World
{Ran from 1983 to 1990}
Please tell me I’m not the only one who remembers this show? I feel like it was part of my morning TV programming, in addition to Saved by the Bell (gotta balance it out). Mr. Wizard’s real name was Don Herbert, and he invited kids to his ‘house’ to show them science experiments and it’s definitely not as creepy as it sounds. Apparently Don died in 2007, but if there’s a Mr. Wizard Jr. out there, a Kickstarter campaign would be a perfect way to maybe fund a web series – or perhaps just find a new Mr. Wizard.
Ghostwriter
{Ran from 1992 to 1995}
Confession: I pretended that Ghostwriter was real and used to write messages to him/her in my composition notebook. Alas, Ghostwriter never came. Maybe it’s because I didn’t have a circle of friends who needed to solve mysteries that the real police couldn’t solve. The whole point of the show was to help kids improve their reading and writing skills, and how awesome would this be as an app? Let’s be real – I would totally download it for myself.*
Name Your Adventure
{Ran from 1992 to 1995}
If you watched TNBC on Saturday mornings like I did, you remember this show, which made kids’ dreams come true. I thought Name Your Adventure was like THE show to be on, since you could literally name your adventure, and it would come to fruition. Kids were able to meet the likes of President Bill Clinton, Tori Amos, and in the video above, the late Jonathan Brandis who starred in the show SeaQuest. The girl wanted to become a director or movie something or other, so host Mario Lopez took her to set and let her hang out. How cool is that? This series showed me that anything is possible and there are so many jobs and things to accomplish out in the world, so I can only imagine what this could provide for kids who only know the life inside their little bubbles. Again, with a crowdfunded campaign, a web series would be perfect for this, and maybe Mario Lopez would even come back to host it.
And we’re back in Capeside again! Well, technically not Capeside… you’ll see. For anyone that’s new to this series, I’ve been documenting my journey to good old Dawson’s Creek (which, BTW is so inaptly named, I’ll get to that in a second) for the past few months, recapping my thoughts as I watch it for the very first time as an adult (view Season 1, 2, 3, and 4 here!)
We ended with the gang graduating from high school, which for most teen dramas means an inevitable jumping of the metaphorical shark. Dawson’s going off to film school 3,000 miles away from home at USC, Joey (who has broken up with Pacey wahhh) is going to her dream college in Boston at an imaginary place called Worthington, BFFs/OTP Jack and Jen are also off to Boston to go to another fictional college called Boston Bay, and Pacey’s taking care of some rich guy’s boat by sailing around the Caribbean. Let’s see what happens when everyone leaves the Creek…
Episode 1
This episode starts off with a voice over that sounds vaguely familiar – and that’s bc it’s Ken Marino. I would tell you what he’s from but he’s been in so many things, so here’s his picture:
This also starts off with Joey – no sign of Dawson – and proves what I’ve been thinking for the past couple seasons: this show is a misnomer. It’s not Dawson’s Creek. It never has been. Unless they meant it to be like, from Joey’s perspective, it’s ‘Dawson’s Creek’. Whatever, it’s still stupid. Katie Holmes is the only person on the cast who has been in every single episode, so just look at the facts. Also I had no idea that they all went to Boston for college!? It’s giving me all the feels of when I was a freshman in Boston.
Anyways, Ken Marino (a professor) was actually reading one of Joey’s papers about that kiss she had with Dawson, and we’re led to believe that they kissed and they parted for college and nothing else ever happened. Perfect.
Enter busy Phillips. She’s deemed herself Jen’s BFF and I’m already loving seeing the beginning of their IRL friendship! Who doesn’t love a good best gal pal friendship?!
Dawson is actually in LA, quietly achieving his life dream in the directors chair and it’s adorable. But there are so many people milling about on this lot, it’s as if there’s just a free for all at the studio. Not exactly how it happens IRL.
PACEY IS BACK FROM THE CARIBBEAN AND HAS A BOAT DOCKED IN BOSTON. BUT HE’S HIDING FROM EVERYONE BUT JEN WTF.
Jack, Jen, Joey, and new BFF Audrey (Busy Phillips) are at their first big college party AND OH LAWD this frat bro is legit wearing a puka shell necklace. And Chad Michael Murray what is your hair. It is really 2001 all over again.
Dawson gets fired from his internship with a legit movie director because he decided to sass him and leaves LA to go to Boston and shows up at Joey’s door. Just when I thought the writers were making the right decision by not putting them together again. Ugh.
Episode 2
PACEY IS KISSING SOMEONE WHO IS NOT JOEY I’m not okay with it. Slash that person is Jennifer Morrison.
Joey is dropping a class and has to wait in a line out the door. I never dropped a class in college because it was all online, but this is 2001. Times were tough back then.
With the help of Dougie, Pacey gets some gumption and gets a job at a restaurant. I’m super happy for him doing something with his life and all, but when is he going to show himself to everyone (read: Joey)? He can only hide for so long. Boston’s a big city, but it ain’t that big.
Well it looks like Dawson’s staying in Boston instead of going back to school in LA, mostly because of Joey. This is no bueno. Unrelatedly, was the general consensus on the last two seasons that it was cursed because now that they’re not in high school, it jumped the shark? Because I get that.
Episode 3
IT HAPPENED! Joey is at the restaurant that Pacey works at and sees him in the kitchen! Let the awkwardness ensue!
Meanwhile, Jack is pledging a frat and I fear that once they find out he’s gay they’re going to take hazing to a whole new level. However, I’ve been proven wrong…
Jack: I’m gay.
Blossom: You thought we didn’t know that?
Jack: Most people are surprised.
Blossom: Most people aren’t Sigma people. You’re sigma people, Jack. You’re one of us.
Jack: You mean, there’s other guys in the house that are gay?
Blossom: You’d be the first.
Jack: Most fraternities are not particularly well known for, you know, their tolerance towards alternative lifestyles.
Blossom: Which is precisely why we need you in this house, McPhee. Listen, Sigma Ep has a reputation for being one of the roughest, party-hearty, alpha male fraternities on campus, a reputation which is not entirely unfounded. The dean wants us to diversify. The dean gets what the dean wants, so, yes, Jack, we know you’re gay, and we want you in this house because you’re gay.
Question: how is this better than affirmative action??
Dawson is back in Capeside and spending some time with his family, particularly with his baby sister, and I have to admit him sitting with her in their front yard under an umbrella is equally hilarious and adorable.
It’s interesting watching this as an adult who has gone through the difficulty of figuring out independence and friendship in the first year of college. I always imagined high school would be like Saved by the Bell – and it wasn’t. I think if I watched this when it was originally on (and I was in high school), I would’ve thought their experience was exactly what college was like. But for me, it definitely was not. As an adult, I watch this season as more of a cynicist thinking, ‘That could never/never happened in college’, where as a teenager, I would have been like, ‘Whoa college is big and scary and filled with frat parties that I would never be invited to’. The first year of college is a day to day thing and you live your life looking at what’s in front of you. It wasn’t a “big picture” thing that the movies and TV portray it as.
Attention: Joey and Pacey finally faced each other and it was actually cute and I hope that they stay friends… for now.
Ok so this is a spoiler I knew was coming: Mitch gets into a car accident. But I did NOT know it’s because he tried to get a scoop of ice cream that he dropped on the floor. DA FAQ just happened. Although maybe he was drunk, because ice cream is his drunk food? No? Just the ice cream? Embarrassing way to go out, man.
Notable Quote: “I don’t know, I could use the snuggles.” Jen, explaining to Joey and Audrey why she’s leaving for a booty call with CMM.
Episode 4
Mitch is officially dead, and I like that they subtly confirm that by showing the “closed for death in the family” sign on the door of their restaurant, because TBH, I don’t need to see an entire episode of Mitch on his death bed. Also, is there really not a better way to get Dawson back to Capeside than having his father killed? I guess dropping out of school wasn’t enough.
Pacey just gave his approval for Dawson and Joey to get back together again, because apparently being at sea has helped him find himself and become a better person.
Pacey: Why on earth would Dawson Leery, of all people, want to drop out of film school? (Looks over at Joey and then knows.) Oh. I get it. It’s ok. You can tell me, Jo. I’m not gonna get upset.
Joey Oh, Pace, I didn’t ask him to, if that’s what you mean.
Pacey: Look. If anybody understands the various shades of gray here, it’s me, and I think it’s time the two of you got your shot… because the way I see it, you never did, and this world could use as many Romeo and Juliet’s as it can get.
Joey: Look what happened to them.
Oh man. Pacey takes Dawson to the crash site to help him realize that it’s not his fault his dad died, and yet again, Pacey Witter proves he is the greatest human #PaceyWitterDreamMan.
Episode 5
I find it comical that Ken Marino has been cast as the hot Englishg teacher when all I picture is him like this:
Jen’s all hooking up with CMM, and it’s to the point where she seems him out at a restaurant with some girl after he told Jen he was working. Pacey attempts to stop Jen from going in there and ripping out his beautiful head of hair and hilarity ensues #PaceyWitterDreamMan
DAWSON – I know it’s really hard, but you need to get a grip and deal with your father’s death. Avoiding it like the plague is not going to help anyone.
Episode 6
Is Pacey’s restaurant the only fancy restaurant they’re allowed to go to on this show, because it really feels that way with the amount of scenes they do here.
In my head, 2001 doesn’t seem that long ago, but please look at Dawson’s caller ID on his Motorola phone:
Why does CMM always play a douche guy? And why does he have a lizard in his room? Is Jen going to become a lesbian? I have a lot of burning questions.
One of those was answered because instead of Jen becoming a lesbian, she tricks CMM to think she’s down for a threesome with his side chick and instead both of them drop him. Again, Jen tricks CMM into a faux threesome. This show.
Yikes, guys. Dawson is drunk this is not going to end weelll. He actually said, ‘Have no fear, Dawson is here.’ He’s the kind of drunk that tells the truth when he’s inebriated so basically he just blamed Joey for his dad dying. sigh.
Episode 7
Dawson finally gets professional help to deal with his dad’s death and this is the therapist he goes to:
Recognize her yet? Time’s up. This is the therapist in 2014:
Episode 8
Well thanks DC writers for perpetualizing the stereotype that frat boys’ main goal is to get laid. Because that’s literally what they’re told to do – bring girls to a party so the brothers can hook up with them, and Jack decides to bring Joey and Audrey. I think it was scenes like this that made me think frats in college were the worst.
PS: Pacey slept with this girl Karen that he works with but honestly she needs to GTFO because she’s playing him like an instrument that you play a lot. And no one messes with our boy.
Speaking of sleeping with people, Dawson takes Jen up to New Hampshire because he won a film contest for the movie he made about his elderly friend Mr. Brooks who died last season. And apparently Dawson and Jen took the state motto, ‘Live free or Die’ to heart because they are into each other again and guess what – Jen gets it in with virgin Dawson! AND she’s wearing these pajamas!
Annnddd they’re dating now. Great.
Notable Quotes: Some guy talking to Dawson at the film festival: “I go to school in Boston. This really weird visual arts place full of freaks and misfits.” – literally sounds like where I went to school.
Episode 9
Ah here’s the annual Halloween episode. Joey, Pacey & Jack are telling scary stories that actually happened to them, and Joey’s is that she was stuck in the school library late at night with a creepy guy and another creepy guy who is Detective Wilden from Pretty Little Liars, so I automatically think he’s sketchy.
In full disclosure I fell asleep and decided not to rewind it.
Episode 10
Guys, turns out I really like Busy Phillips/her character, even after I decided I wasn’t going to like her because of who she ends up dating (hint hint). In the end, she was the right voice to come into the show as they entered a new season – kinda like how Gretchen was the right person to bring in last season. Right character, the right time.
This entire back and forth Pacey and Jack have about Dawson possibility losing his virginity to Jen is fantastic and honestly the best thing that’s happened this season.
For a couple that’s broken up then got back together than broke up and then got back together then broke up, this confrontation between Dawson and Joey re: sleeping with Jen is… WOOF.
Dawson: Joey, it hurts to be around you. When I see you, even from across the room, it brings up a thousand memories. Not just of us, but of my entire life before. It’s like I’m frozen in this place that I can’t bear to be. I care about you so much. As long as I can remember, everything’s always come back to you. I mean, even no matter what was happening between us. Even the thought of you is at least a constant comfort, but… I can’t go back. It just hurts.
Fashion note: I love that Pacey is suddenly Top Chef wearing an apron – and I just noticed he’s stopped wearing those hideous Hawaiian t-shirts. It’s like he was preparing for his voyage to the Caribbean for 4 seasons.
Episode 11
Joey is checking her grades on a board that was printed in computer paper. DO KIDS THESE DAYS EVEN REMEMBER COMPUTER PAPER??
Okay, so maybe I ship Pacey and Joey as friends too because them high giving over his promotion slash her grades is the cutest. Maybe I just really ship Pacey. Have I expressed that feeling yet? #PaceyWitterDreamMan
When is CMM leaving Boston for One Tree Hill, this is absurd. I’m over him. And his ridiculous helmet.
SOMETHING I DID NOT SEE COMING: On My Own reprise!! Well kind of. Joey gets the balls to sing for CMM’s band at this club where all the college kids hang out, and instead of a Broadway song, it’s Blondie. Although it’s less embarrassing than the first time I still can’t help but watch through my fingers. Partly because she started singing with her musical theatre voice and it was weird, but hey, at least she got up there and did it.
Notable Quote: “Right there in the bursar’s office on the formica. It was wild, passionate, hot, animalistic sex.” – Joey, being her usual sarcastic self about hooking up with Professor Ken Marino
Episode 13
Dawson finally decides to go back to film school (in Boston), and as a ‘Back to School’ present, Jen gets Dawson an ET Trapper Keeper and it’s actually super cute. That is the only good thing about this relationship so far. The nostalgic school supplies.
Joey is torn between two lovers – this kid Elliott, a peer and someone her own age who is really into her, and Professor Ken Marino. Joey decides to ditch a date with Elliott in order to go to an academic thing at Prof Ken’s house, and she ends up kissing him. But again, all I can see is Ken Marino. It’s so weird. When she gets back to her dorm, she finds a get well soon basket from Elliott, because she told him she was sick in order to get out of said date. And he made her a card out of construction paper. Look who’s making poor choices again – it’s Josephine Potter.
Notable Quotes:“If that’s what the people want, if they want me to be nasty and sarcastic, I can do that. I just need something that’s gonna take me there. Pacey, say something disgusting.” – Jen
“Sure, would you prefer sexist or just downright vulgar?” – Pacey
Episode 15
DC fans: this is the infamous robbery episode, so brace yourselves. Everyone else – thanks for reading this far but good GOD get ready for an effed up episode (which you can view in its entire below).
I figure this is a ‘Very special episode of Dawson’s Creek because of the different opening credits – it looks like the beginning of a Disney Channel Original Movie.
The episode starts out in Downtown Crossing, which, when I lived blocks away from there, was a bustling area. Even if it’s midnight. Joey is walking by herself at a leisurely pace, staring at stars in the sky. I take this as a bad sign already because no one in Boston does this unless you’re a tourist. Walking is for getting from Point A to Point B. Also, it appears that no one else is around at this time of night – but she said she was taking the subway, and if the subway’s still open, it means there should be people around, but conveniently, there is not a soul in sight.
A man spots Joey going to an ATM vestibule and follows her. Instead of straight up mugging her, he decides to talk to her and tell her he’s not going to rob her. Then asks for money. She says no, but he keeps pushing. Joey being, well, Joey, insists she doesn’t have any and he’s all ‘Bitch I saw you come out of the bank’ (not verbatim). She tries to walk away and he pulls out a gun.
Joey is spending waaayyyy too much time chatting with him. She told him her real name AND the school she goes too NO TIME TO BE SASSY RN JO. THIS SCENE IS LASTING WAY TOO LONG. WHY ARE THEY SPENDING SO MUCH TIME TOGETHER AND WHY ARE THERE NO OTHER PEOPLE AROUND THIS IS THE WORST. NOW SHE’S GIVING HIM DATING ADVICE?? ” I can’t believe I’m even participating in this conversation,” says Joey. I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU’RE PARTICIPATING IN THIS CONVERSATION EITHER.
He takes her back to the bank so she can take out money but the two are still chattering on as if they have all the time in the world. The mugger takes note of Joey’s “nice” coat and refuses to give it to him, but he’s all ‘It wasn’t really a question’ and the camera pans to the gun in the waist of his pants. Not really necessary to keep showing the gun, but okay. He takes the money from her savings ($500) and her coat, and walks away, hopefully never to be seen again.
I just found out that the version on YouTube is different from the one on Netflix, which means unless you want to watch this ep on Netflix, you won’t be able to hear this absolutely ridiculous song that includes the lyrics, “Alone again, as I often am/Candles burn, slowly at both ends/Who am I, why am I here/Can I learn to overcome this fear”. And then this happens:
I’M SORRY, WHAT WAS THAT? THE MUGGER STOPPED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET TO WAVE AT WHO HE JUST MUGGED AND THEN GOT HIT BY A CAR?? I have seen a lot A LOT of TV programming and this is hands down one of the worst scenes I’ve ever seen in my life.
In one of the more frightening scenes of this entire series, Joey goes to get her coat and money back from the seemingly dead body in the middle of the street, but HE WAKES UP and won’t let her call 911 for help, despite the fact he’s bleeding profusely.
He throws her cell phone and he threatens to shoot her, but bitch still refuses. Turns out the gun wasn’t loaded the whole time, but still. If someone has a gun on you, don’t argue with them and make them angrier. I mean she literally says, ‘If you want to shoot me, go right ahead.’ HELLO?? DID PEOPLE STILL WATCH THIS SHOW AFTER THIS EPISODE??
It’s a hit and run and Joey decides to stay with him until the ambulance gets there. The mugger guy is lit’rally on the ground, bleeding, but still wants a cigarette. He can’t light it himself because HE JUST GOT HIT BY A CAR AND IS INJURED so Joey helps him light it. What even. But then she goes to the hospital to make sure he’s okay… THIS EP SHOULD BE RETITLED JOEY: GO HOME.
At the hospital, Joey finds a little girl who I’m convinced is a little girl ghost, because frankly anything could happen at this point. She’s a real girl, whose mother asks Joey to look after her because she needs to look for her husband – who got hit by a car. Yeah, that husband is her mugger who’s currently bleeding to death on an operating table. They put the pieces together and his wife apologizes and gets the hell out of there.
I think it’s a sign that if the wife can’t even stand by her man, you shouldn’t either, right? Nope. The mugger is awake and requests to see Joey, and they talk even more like can you guys just stop? Did the writers run out of ideas? Why is there an entire episode dedicated to this?
Oh, he dies.
Real talk: was this episode part of a theme week on WB? Like Green Week on NBC? Was it Be Aware Of Your Surroundings Week? Don’t Act Like a GD Idiot Day?
Episode 16
In the middle of everyone taking care of Joey and making sure she’s okay every minute of the day, Pacey and Audrey had sex, and they’re in a weird middle ground where Audrey doesn’t want to continue because of the Joey factor. Relatedly, Pacey has now adopted a Shaft look in lieu of his I work at Trader Joe’s look, and I honestly don’t know what’s worse.
Jack and Pacey’s friendship has always been sweet, and Pacey unknowingly goes to a gay bar with Jack and it is the actual cutest. Not to mention guys are hitting on Pacey and he’s just letting it happen. #PaceyWitterDreamMan
Notable Quotes: “Pacey, you’re not gay.” – Jack “Well I know that and you know that and as far as he’s concerned you’re my boyfriend!” – Pacey
Episode 17
There’s a shot of Flutie Flakes – does anyone outside of Western New York/New England remember Flutie Flakes, the cereal named after beloved football player Doug Flutie?
Honestly why is CMM still on this show? Now he’s chasing after Joey romantically and hoping to recruit her for his band. She agrees to fill in as the lead singer, but I find it hard to believe Joey would just agree to do it. Also they’re (the writers) are so trying to sexualize her and it just isn’t working we know her as the girl next door – which isn’t to say she shouldn’t have a sexy side but throughout this entire season even she’s wearing makeup and it’s WEIRD.
Also weird: Pacey and Audrey blatantly want to check in to this sketchy motel to have sex and Joey is forced to stay with them. I’M JUST NOT OVER PACEY & JOEY, OKAY.
Episode 18
There was legit a side swipe cut into another scene. Did someone edit this on windows movie maker?! What is happening to this program?
Forgot to mention Jen broke up with Dawson in the last episode. Nobody cares because nobody cared about that relationship in the first place.
Wait the real episode credits just flashed on the screen that was showing Dawson’s movie it was so meta and weird and The Simpsons-esque do not like. PS: Dawson has a movie.
Notable Quotes: “Can I say something? My Grams is dating a 65-year-old African American man named Clifton Smalls.” – Jen, telling it like it is.
Episode 19
Ok so the only image I had of busy Phillips on DC prior to this marathon was a random vision of her sitting outside a white beach house on spring break. Literally that is one picture I’ve had in my head for all these years and apparently it’s from this episode.
Really didn’t know CMM was on dc for this long. He really took over WB/CW back in the day, didn’t he?
Pacey is back in his natural habitat (Hawaiian shirts)
Wait who is this random YM featured girl duo featured at the MTV Spring break special on the beach – it’s M2M, who I know better as the girls who sang the song from the Pokemon soundtrack.
Oh a baby Hilarie Burton reppin MTV! Getting hit on by her future OTH co star CMM. Remember when she was literally picked off the street during TRL and now she’s like a legit actress who has a baby w Denny from Grey’s? Some gals have all the luck.
I’m still not convinced Joey completely wants Pacey to fall in love with Audrey it’s still too weird. They’re giving each other relationship advice, and there’s still so much flirting and chemistry that it’s hard to believe otherwise.
Meanwhile Dawson is still daydreaming about a relationship with Joey and has a weird flashback of their time together that’s in sepia tone, but the montage was like it wasn’t even finished. This show is in shambles.
Speaking of shambles – Jack just drunkenly jumped from the roof into the pool & Dawson shows up and has the swim in and save him. The fuck.
Of course Dawson is there to win Joey back, and Pacey is straight up like yo Dawson I’m over this Joey shit. Give it up.
It ends with Dawson barefoot on the beach looking pensive and it’s straight out of Sandcastles in the Sand. Get a grip Simon.
Episode 20
There is literally a scrunchie on the doorknob of Joey & Audrey’s dorm room and I literally said EW out loud when they panned to Joey and CMM in bed. GTFO AND GO TO ONE TREE HILL.
ANNA NARDINI. ARE YOU HERE TO RUIN THE SHOW WITH A SURPRISE DAUGHTER TOO.
YUP ANNA NARDINI IS HERE TO RUIN THE SHOW BY SEXUALLY HARASSING PACEY AND KISSING HIM UNWILLINGLY.
Did I mention she’s his new boss? She’s his new boss. And she’s trouble.
Notable Quotes: “Could he be any cuter?” – Audrey “No, but he could be more in tune.” – Joey, on CMM serenading him outside her window.
Episode 21
Sherilyn Fenn is probably a nice human, but she should stop picking roles that make her look like a homewrecker. She continues hitting on Pacey, even goes to his apartment and Audrey walks in on Alex (Dumb homewrecker Sherilyn Fenn) trying to kiss Pacey. Understandably, Audrey leaves in a fit of rage, and when talking do her does work, Pacey goes back to his apartment to sleep with Alex. PACEY WITTER.You’re better than this!
Pacey leads the employees to oust crazy Alex from her dictator-like position at the restaurant, and it works. But then Pacey gets into a car with her and her inner crazy comes out. She basically almost kills both of them. What is happening.
I’m, like, over this. These are the loose ends that need tying up at the end of the season: Grams may or may not get married in Vegas to Clifton Smalls; Jack stayed in Boston to help his gay frat brother; Jen’s off to try repair her relationship with her parents in New York; Audrey and Pacey embark on a road trip to her home in LA; Dawson is being forced to go to LA and Joey is most likely going to Paris with no clothes or luggage.
Meanwhile, the summer after my freshman year of college I went home and worked at the local amusement park where I sat in a hot ticket box and put wristbands on sweaty Rochesterians. Essentially the same thing.
So, folks, one season left, and frankly, I hope it’s better than this one because I lost interest way too many times during this fifth season. Will Joey actually go to Paris? Are Audrey and Pacey still together after their epic road trip? Is Grams marrying Clifton Smalls? Most importantly, WILL I STILL CARE ABOUT ANY OF THIS IN SEASON SIX? Tune in next month for the final chapter of the Dawson’s Creek Virgin Diaries…
Summer TV is usually nonexistent, with a lot of crappy shows and reality TV programs filling in for the good shows while they go on hiatus for a few months. But my absolute favorite summer show is So You Think You Can Dance. Now in its 11th (!!) season, SYTYCD has been the sole series bringing dance to the forefront over the past few years. The alumni have gone on to work for pop stars like Lady Gaga and Madonna, starring in movies like Step Up and Fame, and in general, just getting more recognition than ever before.
And while the entire competition is about finding the best male and female dancers in the country, like a lot of things in life, you improve when you build, connect and create with others. Every year there are exceptionally talented dancers who make it to the top 10, and their talent is ever apparent when they perform together.
So after a painstaking process of narrowing down my favorite numbers, these are the best (IMO) group routines over the past 10 seasons. You can catch new ones when SYTYCD returns on Wednesday!!!
Note: These are in chronological order, not ranked, only because I lit’rally wouldn’t be able to pick absolute favorites. I need help.
If you’ve been a fan from the start (or season 2, because that’s when I like to believe it really started), you know Ramalama is one of the iconic SYTYCD dances ever. This creepy zombie-like routine was choreographed by Wade Robson, who teenyboppers from the late 90s/00s know was the choreographer to both ‘N Sync and Britney Spears – and the rumored guy Brit cheated on from Justin. Yeah, that whole Cry Me A River song? It’s to do with Wade. Allegedly. Anyways, forget that and just watch this haunting routine instead.
Top 6
Choreographer: Mia Michaels ♦ Song: Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap
Mia Michaels became the standout choreographer on the series from the start, creating memorable dances such as this one, and other duets, including the famous ‘Bench Dance’. While she had already long been a fixture in the dance world, she became known to the TV audience as an incredibly talented, unforgettable, challenging choreographer.
Top 4
Choreographer: Wade Robson ♦ Song: SexyBack by Justin Timberlake
Hey, remember what I said about JT and Wade? Here’s Wade using JT’s then-new single for the final four group dance!
Season 3
Top 10
Choreographer: Mia Michaels ♦ Song: The Moment I Said It by Imogen Heap
I accidentally chose a lot of Mia Michaels dances. Oops. I remember this dance giving me chills the first time I watched it, and it still does to this day.
Season 4
Top 4
Choreographer: Mia Michaels ♦ Song: Hallelujah by The Vitamin String Quartet
Is it weird that I really enjoy when they yell ‘HUH’ in the middle of the dance? Again, Mia is known for pushing her dancers with extremely difficult moves. In this final four routine, it’s hard to believe that the two guys, tWitch and Josh (who went onto win) came in as hip hop dancers.
Season 5
Top 8 + Judges
Choreographer: Mia Michaels ♦ Song: One from A Chorus Line
I swear, I really didn’t mean to put this many Mia dances on the list. In my defense, there’s a reason why she’s been nominated for so many Emmys. But can we just talk about the judges getting to dance in the finale? I just need more dancing Adam Shankman in my life, is that so much to ask?
Season 6
Top 20
Choreographer: Amanda and Wade Robson ♦ Song: Comanche by The Revels
Ah, season 6. The ‘lost season’. Like previously mentioned, SYTYCD airs in the summer, but for some reason, Fox execs decided to immediately air season 6 in the fall, directly after season 5 wrapped in the summer. I think because of this, many fans who would usually tune in, didn’t because their other programs were on and took precedence. And it’s frankly a shame because there were a lot of great dancers this season, including some of my all-time faves like Kathryn, Ellenore and Jakob. This particular dance is definitely in my top five.
Season 7
Top 11 + All-Stars
Choreographer: Wade Robson ♦ Song: Fame by David Bowie
Season 7 brought the introduction of the All-Stars, which saw the return of standout alumni from the past 6 seasons. It was a brilliant addition to the show, and the very first show after the auditions was an introduction to the top 11, with this as the opening number. As a total SYTYCD geek, and definitely fangirled seeing some of the best former contestants from over the years dancing with the newbies. I may have kept this episode on my DVR for like 2 years just to watch this routine over and over again. Yes, I realize now I could have just been watching it on YouTube the entire time.
Top 8
Choreographer: Mia Michaels ♦ Song: Every Little Thing She Does is Magic by Sting
This is about Alice in Wonderland. A concept that’s not as murky.
Season 8
Top 10 Guys
Choreographer: Christopher Scott ♦ Song: Velocity by Nathan Lanier
As the seasons go on, I feel like the group numbers get bigger and props are involved more than ever. This one involves doors, so you know it’s going to be good.
Top 8
Choreographer: Tyce Diorio ♦ Song: The Circus Sets Up from Water for Elephants soundtrack
To continue with the props, this one is like a full out stage production of Pippin or something. That being said, it’s still absolutely stunning to look at.
Season 9
Top 20
Choreographer: Christopher Scott & Sonya Tayeh ♦ Song: Torn by Nathan Lanier
I love when choreographers get together – and I love it even more when they’re two of my favorites. Christopher Scott and everyone’s favorite contemporary weirdo Sonya Tayeh collaborated on this epic dance where the only prop is… air. With Christopher Scott’s eye for cinematic storytelling and Sonya’s eccentric and distinguishable dance moves, this routine is one of the most impressive and memorable from the entire series.
Top 10 Girls
Choreographer: Travis Wall ♦ Song: Where the Light Gets In by Sennen
Travis! SYTYCD fans know that Travis is like the golden child of the series. He was a runner-up in season 2, then went on to make his choreographer debut in season 5, and soon became a favorite amongst not only the fans but the judges as well. His fluid choreography and emotional storytelling is almost like the second coming of Mia Michaels. Just not as intense.
Cyrus Spencer, All-Stars Comfort Fedoke, Stephen ‘tWitch’ Boss, Choreographer Christopher Scott
Choreographer: Christopher Scott & Sonya Tayeh ♦ Song: Holy Ghost (Helicopter Showdown and Sluggo Remix) by Messinian
When a contestant is paired up with an all-star, that’s stressful enough – but to be put with two AND the choreographer, it must be daunting. But Cyrus, who was the runner-up this season showed no signs of intimidation in this number.
Season 10
Curtis Holland, Alexis Juliano, Aaron Turner
Choreographer: Anthony Morigerato ♦ Song: You Really Did It (Live) by Jason Mraz
When I used to dance, tap was my jam. It has a special place in my heart and always will. So when this trio – of three tappers in the top 10! – did this routine, I’m pretty sure I cried a little because it was so good and I was just happy to see tap so well represented on the show for once.
Top 10 Guys
Choreographer: Christopher Scott ♦ Song: Sand by Nathan Lanier featuring Karen Whipple
This number involves sand. Like actual sand. As a prop.
Top 20
Choreographer: Tabitha and Napoleon D’Umo ♦ Song: Puttin’ on the Ritz by Herb Alpert featuring Lani Hall
You know those lip dubs that was the cool thing to do like two years ago? This dance is like that but just with dancing.
Top 10
Choreographer: Christopher Scott ♦ Song: The Gravel Road from The Village
So there were a lot of great group dances last season, so what? Christopher Scott killed it again with this routine by incorporating rocking chairs, but also using that motion in the moves as well. Meanwhile, I can barely choreograph my own daily life so I’m feeling super accomplished.
Well folks, it happened. George Clooney is betrothed. To a woman who is not a model by profession. In case you didn’t know, Amal Alamuddin is a 36-year-old Lebanon-born, London-based lawyer, who specializes in international law, human rights, extradition and criminal law. She went to Oxford and NYU, is fluent in English, French and Arabic, and has previously worked with now-Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor and represented WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange in 2011. Basically, she’s no dummy, and different than all the other girls George has loved before, which is why I think this is legit. But let’s be real – how many people actually thought George would ever get engaged again? His first marriage to actress Talia Balsam (who’s now married to silver fox John Slattery) didn’t work out and he publicly vowed to never marry again. Yet here we are. Albeit he still needs to actually exchange vows with her, I, and I assume the rest of the pop culture-obsessed public, never thought this would happen. There are hundreds of other things I thought would happen before George ever put a ring on anyone, let alone a woman that might actually be the one. Here’s a list of just some of the things I thought would happen before Cloonster would ever settle down.
okay, but doesn’t this look like a scene from Out of Sight?
Clooney reprising his role as Batman
Lou Bega making a legit come back
Wait, guys… I’m JUST realizing this is Mambo NUMBER 5. WHAT HAPPENED TO MAMBOS 1 THROUGH 4?!?
FACT: I recently witnessed my mother using AOL and let me tell you – this screenshot is not that far off from what it looks like in 2014. BUDDY LISTS. !
Finding MH370
… Too soon?
Figuring out the exact number of licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop
Actually liking Tootsie Roll Pops
Honestly, the most disgusting candy.
The Buffalo Bills going to the Super Bowl
A little Western New York humor for you
Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams getting back together
Discovering the real identity of -A on Pretty Little Liars
This will happen once the show ends for real. Maybe.
Actually going through the threat of quitting Facebook
The Friday Night Lights movie happening
Probably for the best that this isn’t a thing.
The Friends reunion happening
Yeah, probs for the best this isn’t a thing either.
Reading through the entirty of the iTunes Terms and Conditions
May is a big month for television. In addition to all the season finales and unfortunate cancellations (TROPHY WIFE UGHHH), networks also reveal the pilots that have been picked up to series for the upcoming season. Every year, there are trailers that make you think ‘Why da faq did they pick this show up’ but then there’s always the ‘I need this show to come on now because watching the 3 minute preview isn’t enough’. To help you weed through the bramble, I’ve compiled a list of shows I think actually have a shot of making it at least one season. Are any of these your early favorites too?
The Comedies
A to Z
Thursdays, 9:30pm • NBC
If you’re a Mad Men fan, you might recognize the lead male as cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs Michael Ginsberg. If you’re a Mindy Project fan, you might remember him as the pretentious guy Mindy dated who adorably played the ukelele and sang a Katy Perry song. And if you’re a How I Met Your Mother fan, you might recognize the lead female as Tracy ‘I’m Not a Plot Device’ McConnell.
I’m going to be honest with you guys and tell you that I have probably watched this trailer at least 8 times already, which is probably 7 times too many. While Ben Feldman and Cristin Milioti aren’t necessarily big actor names like some of the other shows that got picked up for next season, I hope people still decide to watch it, because it looks super cute… and maybe a little HIMYM-esque? Whatevs, I’m into it.
Bad Judge
Thursdays, 9:00pm • NBC
The great Kate Walsh returns to network TV! Addison Montgomery has switched occupations and is now a judge. A ‘Bad Judge’ if you will. I didn’t really expect much before watching this, but I was delightfully surprised when I literally LOLed a couple times. It’s reminiscent of Bad Teacher, both the Cameron Diaz movie and the TV show which was recently cancelled after just a few episodes (side rant: I only saw the pilot, but it was hilarious. Come ON CBS).
Black-ish
Wednesdays, 9:30pm • ABC
Like Bad Judge, I wasn’t really expecting much, but again I was delightfully surprised. I’m just gonna go ahead and say this about Anthony Anderson: he doesn’t have the greatest track record with his own starring shows. But this show is different from his previous ones, and I think Laurence Fishburne has a lot to do with it. His presence makes you take the show seriously. And ABC did a great job at pairing it after Modern Family, because it has that same sort of tone to it. A sitcom with heart. What’s it about, you ask? Family.
The McCarthys
Thursdays, 9:30pm • CBS
I might be a little biased because I used to live in Boston, but I’m always partial to shows that are set in that great city. Admittedly, not all of those shows are good, but this one has potential. The show is centers on a typical Boston family and the gay son who never really fit in. It’s important to note that Joey McIntyre, Boston’s pride and joy, is also in this show, so that gives you a reason to watch, if you’re into like, NKOTB or the 80s. Also worth noting that this show is super CBS. It’s multicam, shot in front of a live audience, includes corny jokes that your mom laughs at because she also watches Two and a Half Men still, type show.
Tribeca
This is a cop show starring Rashida Jones and created and executive produced by Steve Carell, his wife Nancy, and Conan O’Brien. That is all.
Honorable Mentions
Marry Me: Starring Casey Wilson & Ken Marino, created by a producer of Happy Endings (also Casey’s fiance IRL)
I really want this show to do well, because, RIP Happy Endings, but mehhh I hope the pilot is better than the trailer.
Mulaney : Starring John Mulaney, Martin Short, Nasim Pedrad
This show has taken a really long time to get off the ground, but SNL writer alum John Mulaney is really funny and I’m glad his show is finally getting air time. Except I also really don’t want it to be Seinfeld-esque.
Horrible name and theme for an actually funny trailer. It’s a modern day My Fair Lady, except all the social media references make it outdated already. It’ll be interesting to see if viewers take to it or not.
Hey, Shondaland loyalists – this show is for you. To everyone else waiting outside the park, get in line, because Shonda Rhimes is LIT’RALLY taking over Thursday nights, and you need to be there or else be left out of watercooler (?) discussions on Friday. Viola Davis stars in this new drama that is on top of my list for new series this fall. And if you’re wondering how you know the tall, black kid – it’s because he played Dean Thomas in the Harry Potter movies. DEAN FRIGGIN THOMAS.
Gracepoint
Thursdays, 9:00pm • Fox
I’m not a Doctor Who fan, but I imagine that you Whovians are probably excited that David Tennant is going to be on American TV. Gracepoint is a crime drama based on U.K.’s Broadchurch, which David also starred in. In fact Broadchurch just won 3 TV BAFTAs including Best Drama on Sunday, which is basically the Emmys of the U.K. Another reason to get excited for this is that Anna Gunn, everyone’s favorite drug lord accomplice is back and on the other side of the coin as a detective, as they try to solve the murder of a young boy. Hopefully this turns out better than The Killing.
Gotham
Mondays, 8:00pm • Fox
The superhero world expands yet again, this time with the focus on Batman’s Gotham City, and more importantly on Comissioner Gordon played by Ryan Atwood Ben McKenzie.
Constantine
Fridays, 10:00pm • NBC
I’m not a big comic book person, but I just think this show’s going to do really well because everyone else seems to be into comic book stuff these days. Also I couldn’t get through the whole trailer because I got grossed out.
State of Affairs
Mondays, 10:00pm • NBC
The ever-polarizing Katherine Heigl is back on TV as a CIA analyst trying to find out who killed her fiance. Her fiance whose mom is the President of the United States of America. And also Alfre Woodard.
This thriller is created by Kevin Williamson, so obviously it’s going to be creepy. Maybe creepy enough to become a hit.
Midseason Shows
Backstrom {Rainn Wilson}, Agent Carter {Another Marvel Universe hit}, Wayward Pines {Twin Peaks like with a lot of Oscar-nominated actors}, Battle Creek {Vince Gilligan proves that he’s a genius and it wasn’t just luck with Breaking BAd} Empire {Terrance Howard and Taraji P. Henson, produced by Lee Daniels, written by Gilmore Girls’ Doyle McMaster/Danny Strong about a hip hop empire}, Galavant (A medevil musical. No really. Just watch the trailer}
For Grey’s Anatomy fans, tonight marks the end of an era. An era that will forever be remembered as, if I can be so bold to assume, ‘The Golden Years’. Our beloved cardiothoracic surgeon Cristina Yang is going off to Switzerland to be a high-tech heart hologram holding doctor.
For me, Cristina is one of those characters that unexpectedly stands out more than the lead role. Like, Meredith is fine, but Cristina brings a certain edge into the show, and that’s all thanks to Sandra Oh. Fun fact: she originally auditioned to be Dr. Bailey (now played by Chandra Wilson), but didn’t get the part, and obviously she was eventually hired as Dr. Yang. But can you even imagine anyone else playing Yang? Sandra makes you actually root for this super Type A character, who sometimes has no regard for others’ feelings. But behind that tough exterior, you know she cares, and is loyal to her loved ones. And all those intricacies of the character are executed perfectly by Sandra Oh.
It’s hard to believe, but she’s never won an Emmy for this role. Yes she’s been nominated, and she’s even won a Golden Globe and SAG Award, but never the coveted Emmy. Yes, I get that most of the time awards are overrated, but like Ron Swanson says, they’re not stupid unless they go to the right people. Here just a few scenes from the past 10 seasons of Sandra Oh’s brilliant work as Cristina, that astonishingly never got her that golden statue. No matter what happens at the Emmys, thank you for sharing this amazing character with us for 10 years. You’ll always be our person.
Cristina Can’t Stop Crying
Season 2, Episode 3
Cristina, who is by all means in the definition of an “It’s Complicated” relationship with her boss, Dr. Burke, finds out she’s pregnant. And then loses the baby. Cristina is exactly a maternal type, or a sensitive type, or a type who cries for that matter, so the fact that she can’t stop after losing the baby is half tragic and half hilarious.
Cristina Can Breathe Again
Season 3, Episode 25
Like previously mentioned, Cristina’s relationship with Burke was anything but picture perfect. Off screen, Isaiah Washington said that thing and was fired, but luckily it kind of worked out for Cristina’s character. She and Burke were due to get married, but he called it off, and instead of feeling depressed about it, she felt extremely relieved. Easily my favorite Cristina/Sandra Oh ACTING moment ever. I still get the chills.
Cristina Tries to ‘Talk Girl’
Season 4, Episode 13
Cristina Yang is not a girly girl. She doesn’t gossip, she doesn’t naturally inquire about people’s personal lives. But bless her, this is her trying to fit into that mold.
Cristina Gets Choked By Owen
Season 5, Episode 19
When Cristina first meets Owen, he’s fresh from being a trauma surgeon in Iraq, but because of that, he has severe PTSD. They start a relationship but he unconsciously chokes her in her sleep – but she still does her best to help him cope.
Cristina Is Willing To Do Anything For Her Job
Season 6, Episode 11
When he was in Iraq, Owen forged a special friendship with Dr. Teddy Altman, who not so secretly was in love with him. However when she arrived at Seattle Grace (Mercy West I think at this point?) Owen was happily in a relationship with Cristina. Herein lies the love triangle – Cristina, the ever over-achieving heart surgeon looks up to attending cardiothoracic surgeon Teddy. She can’t seem to handle Cristina and Owen together and decides to leave the hospital, but in this scene, Cristina begs her to stay, promising her anything if she keeps her job at Seattle Grace. Even Owen. Note the last part of this clip – Sandra Oh emotes about 10 different emotions in a matter of seconds.
Cristina Misses Her Dad
Season 6, Episode 21
Again, Cristina isn’t one to show her emotions easily, and if she does, she has only been able to be completely comfortable around like three people. When talk of her dad who has passed away comes up, she can’t hold it in any longer. Not even Meredith could help her this time.
Cristina Operates on Derek
Season 6, Episode 24
In what was probably the best season finale of the series to date (and one of the best in TV history), a man whose wife was a patient of Derek’s comes in looking to kill him for “killing” his wife and shoots anyone that’s in his way. Long story short, Derek gets shot, Cristina is secretly operating on him and she has to pretend to kill Derek right in front of Meredith in order to get the shooter out of the OR. Oh and then Owen gets shot trying to protect Meredith. Woof.
Cristina Has a Meltdown During Surgery
Season 7, Episode 2
After the traumatic experience of operating on her best friend’s husband with a shooter on the loose, Cristina (understandably) gets a stress disorder and can barely perform in the operating room or anywhere else for that matter. Sandra Oh being in shock is something you just can’t take your eyes off of.
Cristina Lets It Go
Season 7, Episode 10
At this point, Cristina has essentially quit being a doctor and even took up bartending to spend her days, because the stress of being back in the hospital and in fear is too much. But Derek takes her on a fishing trip and in one glorious moment, everything changes. The realization that she doesn’t have to live in fear anymore is brilliantly executed by Sandra, and it’s like we all breathed a sigh of relief with her too.
Cristina Finds Out She Operated on Henry
Season 8, Episode 10
So Teddy has this patient (Scott Foley aka Jake on Scandal) who she befriends and eventually marries so he can use her health insurance and undergo operations to treat some rare disease. But eventually it catches up to him and Teddy calls on Cristina to perform one last big surgery on Henry, but Teddy doesn’t want to tell Cristina who her patient is so she doesn’t feel extra pressure. Unfortunately he doesn’t make it, but Sandra kills (no pun intended) it in this scene.
Cristina’s Shock After The Crash
Season 9, Episode 2
Oh boy, the infamous plane crash of 2013 that left two people dead, one person with no legs, and Cristina, who ends up getting PTSD from the horrible experience of being left in the forest for days. Now it was Owen’s turn to take care of Cristina, and good LORD does Sandra Oh just blow it off the roof in this scene. To be able to play numb must be really hard, but to play it convincingly is even harder.
Cristina and What Could Have Been
Season 10, Episode 17
Much like when producers/writers know it’s going to be the end of the series, it’s always helpful to know if a cast member is leaving well in advance so that they get a proper ending. Unlike Burke/Isaiah Washington who just up and left, everyone knew going into this season that it would be Cristina/Sandra’s last, which let Shonda & co. give her a proper goodbye. This season, there was an entire episode dedicated to Cristina, and what would have happened to her if she just made one different decision. This entire episode highlights not only Cristina as a character but Sandra as an actress, and Shonda knew that. Cristina deserves a proper farewell, and the finale I’m sure will do just that.
How is it May already? I swear it was just January. At the beginning of the year, my friends and I came up with two mottos to live by (because we couldn’t pick just one). It’s pretty self explanatory, but basically we’ve been using these phrases to help push us to do things that we would have been hesitant to do otherwise, or things we’ve been putting off for forever.
I don’t know about you guys, but I like making to-do lists. I get great joy in crossing things off my to-do lists. Every summer, I make a list of TV shows that I’ve been meaning to watch but never have time to during the regular TV season. Last year, I managed to plow through 7 series (welp) in a matter of months. But this summer, in the spirit of our 2014 mottos, I’ve decided to expand my summer bucket list beyond the small screen. I put things on my list that I’ve been putting off the rest of the year, and hopefully this will be the summer I will get shit done. Here are some of the things on my to do list this summer.
Read More Books
In full disclosure, I’m not much of a reader. Legit my favorite books are popular young adult novels and biographies by celebrities. But whatever. Molly gave me John Green’s Looking for Alaska and I shit you not, it took me like a year to get through – not because it wasn’t good, but because I just struggle to find time to sit down and focus on a book instead of watching TV or something. In February, I bought BJ Novak’s book, One More Thing (and met him at a signing, NBD), and as of May 1st, I have only read 33 pages. Again, it’s not because I don’t like it – I do, it’s really funny – but because ugh sitting down to read. But guys, I’m gonna finish it this summer. And I’m going to re-read The Fault in Our Stars before the movie comes out. And I’m going to read Gone Girl before that movie comes out in October… uh do you see a pattern?
Get Through My Netflix Queue
I am one of those rare people who still have both the Instant AND DVD subscriptions with Netflix. While I use Instant frequently, I tend to sit on DVDs for a long time, which I’m sure a lot of people do too. I had Rock of Ages for like 6 months. In the end I forced myself to watch it and I didn’t even pay full attention to it. I have like over 200 movies in my queue, and I’ve been trying really hard to not hold on to one movie for too long. As you may have guessed, I’m more of a TV person, so there are a lot of films I still haven’t seen (legit JUST saw This is the End last week. Hated it. Best part was BSB. And Emma Watson), and I’m going to attempt to get through a lot of films in my queue – maybe get it down to like 75? That seems too lofty…
I Never Said I Wasn’t Going To Not Put TV Shows On This List
The past few weeks, some of my favorite shows have been wrapping up their seasons early (SCANDAL THO. AND PARKS!). It was April for goodness sake! I mean How I Met Your Mother wrapped in March! Shows are supposed to end in May! /endrant. Basically this means I can start my TV watching a little earlier than usual. So what am I watching this year?
(This will be my Everest. I always felt left out with the Kitten Mittens joke. 10 seasons… we’ll see.)
Learn How To Make GIFs
Because, obviously. Relatedly: PHOTOSHOP IS EXPENSIVE WTF.
Explore LA
I’ve lived here for about five years now, and still have so much more to discover. I went hiking for the first time a couple weeks ago, which is like a thing that everyone in LA does. There are restaurants I went to go to, neighborhoods I’ve never seen before, and not gonna lie, the Backstreet Boys got their star on the Walk of Fame last year and I STILL haven’t been to it, even though I drive near it on my commute to work.
Well, there it is. Do you guys make to-do lists like this too?! Share in the comments below!
It is only fitting that we end a week full of Friends nostalgia with a look at the present. It’s been 10 years since the series finale, but nearly 20 years since it first debuted (YIKES). That means that there’s been a huge chunk of time where we haven’t gotten an update on some of the characters who entered (and promptly exited) the world of Friends. So here’s a look at what some of our Friends’ friends are up to in 2014. And maybe a look at the actual Friends themselves.
*Ed note: THIS IS OBVIOUSLY NOT REAL AND NOT WRITTEN BY THE BRILLIANT WRITERS FROM THE SHOW. I AM JUST A MERE MORTAL SUPERFAN WHO THINKS THESE PEOPLE ARE REAL.
Paul the Wine Guy {Season 1, Episode 1}
Paul the Wine guy (still unsure whether he sells or drinks it) told Monica he hadn’t been able to perform… sexually since breaking up with his ex-wife, and after Monica slept with him, she found out it was just a line he used. Since then that line actually did work on someone and he went on to marry her. They have 2 kids and in 2010, they divorced. He actually CAN’T perform sexually anymore.
Paolo {Season 1}
Paolo moved back to Italy a few years after striking out with Rachel, Pheebs and multiple other women in New York City. However in 2003, he was deported from Italy for being too good looking and moved BACK to the US. He still couldn’t score girls here.
Eddie Menuek {Season 2}
Shortly after moving out of Chandler’s apartment, Eddie’s sister and ex-girlfriend join forces and decide he needs to get medical help for his mental illness. He’s been receiving treatment for his schizophrenia ever since. He was also recently featured in an episode of My Strange Addiction for his desire to carrying around the urn with his cat’s ashes everywhere he goes.
Fun Bobby {Season 1 & 2}
There was a reason Fun Bobby was called FUN Bobby and it’s because he drank alcohol. Ridiculously dull Bobby is now 12 years sober (hit a rough patch around ’02) and somehow ended up as Lindsay Lohan’s sponsor.
Chip Matthews {Season 2}
Chip Matthews still works at the Multiplex, but is now the night manager and finally moved out of his parents’ house and lives in a studio apartment. He had a kid with his former Lincoln High hook-up Nancy Branson in 2011, but she has full custody, mainly because she passed off their daughter as hers after cheating with Chip on her husband. Chip still rides a motorcycle.
Russ {Season 2, Episode 10}
After Rachel broke up with him, Russ went back to his on-again, off-again girlfriend, Saychel. They had an oops baby named Emmitt and lived happily ever after.
Richard Burke {season 2}
In 2006, Richard found a lovely woman named Barbara who is only 7 years his junior. Richard retired in 2012 and left his practice to his son. They moved to Poughkeepsie and he occasionally contributes to Cigar Aficionado magazine.
Chloe the Copy Girl {Season 3}
Chloe’s incident with Ross didn’t phase her since she slept with randos all the time, and she’s kept the same lifestyle ever since. She did, however, transfer to a FedEx Kinkos in Williamsburg – that is until she got caught for shoplifting Zunes in 2005 and had to spend a month in jail and pay a $1,200 fine. She now works at a fro-yo shop in New Jersey.
Kathy {Season 4}
After cheating on Chandler with her co-star Nick, the two fell in love frreal and they moved to LA in hopes to actually become big shot actors. Nick had modest jobs in theater while Kathy got her big break by booking a lead role in a pilot called Criminal Minds in 2006. Kathy’s career skyrocketed while Nick’s floundered. She let the fame get to her head and slept with one of her co-stars (name maybe rhymes with Flamar Boore) and Nick broke up with her. As Rachel’s mom always said, “Once a cheater, always a cheater.”
Bonnie {Season 4}
It took a while for Bonnie to get over Ross just leaving her for Rachel at the beach house, but the one thing she did get out of the relationship was her new look that she soon embraced. Bonnie rocked the bald head and became a successful wig model both in the US and abroad.
Emily Waltham {Season 4 & 5}
The British chippie never came back to the U.S. after her breakup with Ross, deeming all American men ‘cheeky cheating buggers’. She married a lad called George in 2005 and they have 3 boys who all play rugby.
Danny the Yeti {Season 5}
Friends was actually a secret crossover with Scandal because Danny is really Charlie who started his storied career in B613 just like Huck – in the hole. He spent 3 years in the isolated, dark space and that’s why he looks so disheveled.
Paul Stevens {Season 6}
Paul is still trying to handle his emotions to this day. Not much has changed – he still sings Love Machine into his mirror. He recently had to move in to his daughter Elizabeth’s house since their family home was flooded. Guy still can’t catch a break.
Tag Jones {Season 7 & 8}
Tag slept worked his way up the Ralph Lauren ladder and is now the head buyer of the company’s tennis sportswear division.
Parker {Season 8}
Parker, still enthusiastic about everything, finally met his match in an equally enthusiastic woman named Verna from Massapequa.
Will Colbert {Season 8}
Will had a brief slip after finding out the I Hate Rachel Club which he co-founded and put his entire heart and soul into in high school was shattered, and gained 20 pounds back. But he managed to lose it all and a little extra and has since moved far away from Ross, Rachel & their kid to Thailand with pal Ta-Taka-Ki-Kek, and they started a gym in Bangkok.
Charlie Wheeler {Season 9 & 10}
Charlie stayed with Dr. Benjamin Hobart for good, and they moved to Germany, where they both work at the Natural History Museum in Berlin.
Amanda Buffamonteezi {Season 10}
Amanda lives in London, but instead of keeping her (fake) British accent, she decided to switch back to her original Yonkers one to seem more “exotic”.
Erica {Season 10}
After giving her baby to Chandler and Monica, Erica moved back to Ohio. She went to church camp and ended up being the director after 5 years of being a counselor. She quit in 2009 to become a full-time mom for her 2 kids, Chandler and Monica.
Gunther
Gunther became the owner of Central Perk in 2007, and finally gave up on his dreams of being with Rachel when he realized he’s been in love with Ross the entire time. He lives with his partner Chet in Chelsea.
Marcel
Marcel continued his acting career in various action and comedy movies but retired in 2011. He now lives in Florida.
Since we’re probably never going to get a reunion, here’s what our favorite Friends are up to now.
Ross & Rachel
After ditching her Louis Vuitton job in Paris to get off the plane, Rachel lost the job offer – but went to work at Gucci instead. She then landed a job at Tory Burch and serves as the director of merchandising for accessories. Ross still works at NYU and gives lectures around the world about his once-controversial theory on sediment flow rates. In addition to Emma (who is turning 12 on May 16th!!), Rach & Ross had 2 more kids, and they all go to space camp in the summer. Ben is finishing up his first year at NYU, and totally ignores his dad if he sees him on campus.
Monica & Chandler
Monica and Chandler still live upstate with 10 year olds Jack and Erica. Chandler has some kind of higher-up job in advertising (no one really is sure what his title is) and Monica started her own restaurant in their town.
Phoebe & Mike
Phoebe and Mike moved to Brooklyn and have five kids, yes five. It’s like their own little Von Trapp family, since they all make beautiful music together and sometimes take their show on the road. Literally. In an RV.
Joey
Joey (who maybe in another life moved to L.A., but for the purpose of this story he never did) scored a job on Law & Order: SVU as a regular in 2007, but pissed off the writers yet again and was killed off. Luckily, thanks to syndication he still gets royalties. Also, with the boom in TV shows filming in NY, he’s been in shows like The Good Wife, 30 Rock and Girls. He finally met a woman that was worth settling down with – a beautiful blonde model-turned-caterer who owns her own company.
Cookies + Sangria 