Frances McDormand was thisclose to Cady Herron-ing her Oscars speech, Armie Hammer shot hot dogs at an unsuspecting movie theater-going audience, Kobe Bryant became an Oscar winner, and the La La Land/Moonlight jokes flowed like the tears I had for almost every performance of the nominated Original Songs. But as always, the fashion made headlines too and we’re just another blog adding to the list. Did your faves make the cut?
Molly’s Picks
Lupita Nyong’o in Atelier Versace
Lupita has been one of our favorites since she came onto the scene looking and acting like a modern-day Audrey Hepburn several awards seasons ago. This beaded sash is gorgeous (I love a good sash, but on most people they veer on either the beauty pageant, Grand Duchess, or Michael Jackson side…) and check out the gold sewn into her hair!
Gal Gadot in Givenchy Haute Couture
I’m always a sucker for anything flapper-inspired and this look is all glam and glitter. It’s no mistake that so many of our favorites are gold, silver and champagne-colored. It’s a big night and I love when stars treat it as such. The diamond and aquamarine necklace is so classic that I was surprised it wasn’t vintage.
Mira Sorvino in Ramona Kavenza
It’s cherry blossoms! Mira is making up for lost red carpet time in a stunning way here. Not to start another controversy about dress color – I think we can all agree we shouldn’t go down that road again – but I read this described as blue and I really do not see it. Surely they meant blush?
Margot Robbie in Chanel Haute Couture
Margot’s gown is one of the simplest on our list, but it’s deceptive. Look at the criss-cross layers on the skirt and the wispy feathery detail along the top — it’s a real god is in the details situation.
Gina Rodriguez in Zuhair Murad
Gina always looks stunning on the red carpet because she is always entirely polished without being overdone. Sleek hair, simple but evening-appropriate makeup, and this silvery cloud of a gown all come together to make her look full-Hollywood glam.
Honorable Mention: Rita Moreno in Her Old Dress From 1962
This works on so many levels. Reminding us that Rita Moreno is such an institution that she’s been around for over 55 years of Oscar history; reminding us that Rita Moreno’s dress from 55 years ago still fits (I’ll never feel smug about still fitting into my prom dress again…); reminding us that Rita can somehow pull off showing more skin in her 80s than she did in her 30s. The dress was created in the Philippines from a Japanese obi and it’s as beautiful in 2018 as it was in 1962.
Traci’s Picks
Allison Janney in Reem Acra
Allison Janney – sorry – OSCAR WINNER Allison Janney picked the perfect gown to take home the golden trophy. The sleeves, the hair slicked back, the deep V paired with the simple diamond necklace, gives just the right kind of drama that an Oscar winner should display. The only thing we’re disappointed in is that she didn’t do The Jackal at the end of her speech.
Chadwick Boseman in Givenchy
This is how a a king should dress.
Allison Williams in Armani Privé Couture
I always love when an actress goes for straight up Hollywood glamour at the Oscars, and Allison did just that. The beading, the sheer illusion top and the wavy hair all come together to help give Allison the perfect movie star look.
Zoey Deutch in Elie Saab
The Disaster Artist actress (did you know she’s Lea Thompson’s daughter??) wasn’t nominated for anything but still showed up to the party looking fabulous, and I’m into it. In a sea of white, this off-white gown stands out from the crowd.
Emily V. Gordon in J. Mendel
Emily’s dress was old Hollywood and Met Gala combined. I particularly love the velour/velvet crimson belt that added a bit more depth to the whole look.
Honorable Mention: Best Couple – Armie Hammer in Armani Prive Couture and Timothee Chamalet in Berluti
Welcome to our 2016 Academy Awards fashion roundup! It was a great night for fashion, and a great night for Leonardo DiCaprio, so between those two things we are feeling fantastic today. In fact, everyone looked so wonderful that we had a hard time coming up with some of our worst dressed picks. What a good problem to have!
Best Dressed
Molly’s Picks
Alicia Vikander in Louis Vuitton
Here’s what I love: even if actresses say they never thought they were going to win, nominees at least know it’s a possibility. Thus. the picture of them winning their Oscar will be the iconic image of them throughout their whole career. And in this tea length, absolutely cloud-like embellished gown, I think Alicia realized that. Somewhat polarizing because some people thought it was TOO princess-y, I thought it set the tone for the refined-yet-youthful vibe Alicia has in many of her roles.
Saoirse Ronan in Calvin Klein
This made my best dressed list not just for the dress itself – though the combo of sequins and patterns, plus the simple cut and neckline, is fantastic. I also love the symbolism Saoirse sneaked into there. She specifically wanted green to symbolize Ireland, since it’s not just her country but also the focus of her nominated film. It’s the same color she wore for her first nomination for Atonement – a nice, non-obnoxious way to remind us this isn’t her first Oscar nod. And it sends a clear message that, at 21, Saoirse’s no longer a child actor. Plus her skin looks amazing with that color.
Olivia Munn in Stella McCartney
Between that color, the off-shoulder cape, and the snake bracelet, Olivia perfectly hit that line between a bold look and something a bit more over-the-top. The sleek column silhouette suits her so well!
Olivia Wilde in Valentino
Maybe my favorite gowns are the ones that land on half of the best dressed lists and half of the worst dressed lists: it means they at least aren’t too boring. The tidy ivory micro-pleats are sort of Grecian-meets-angelic, and the back of the dress is so pretty, too (a dress with a nice back is like the Awards show version of “AND it has pockets!”). Maybe I don’t love the choker but maybe I’m also starting to come around to the choker revival.
Naomi Watts in Armani Prive
My favorite part: the violet-blue-pink gradient on the bodice, that is subtle enough that’ it’s not “OMG ombre.” I must be part magpie because I cannot stop looking at all of those sequins. Loving that touch of Old Hollywood with the Bulgari necklace, and the non-overdone – but not overly beachy – hair.
Honorable Mention: Jacob Tremblay in his darling little suit; Brie Larson, who like Alicia Vikander seems to have chosen a dress KNOWING that it was going to be the picture you’ll see of her for the rest of her career.
Traci’s Picks
Charlize Theron in Dior
Frankly, it’s quite annoying how naturally gorgeous Charlize is. She’s the type of person that can make anything look good, and on top of that, she is always so freaking classy. And sexy. This dress looks like it was made just for Charlize’s frame, and perfectly draped on her. The train is not too long and photographs great, and I love the pairing of the long diamond necklace.
Daisy Ridley in Chanel Haute Couture
Daisy Ridley made her debut at the Oscars and it definitely won’t be her last. If you followed her on the Star Wars press tour, you already know she’s been killing it on the red carpet and even giving Lupita a run for her money. This silver embellished gown has so much detail, and all I want to do is look at it up close and look at it in awe. Plus those silver heels are everything.
Margot Robbie in Tom Ford
Margot was a presenter at the show, but she dressed like a literal winner aka human Oscar. And I love it. A sparking gold dress like this is already a statement on its own, so I love that she kept her hair and her makeup toned down. She looks even more gorgeous than usual, since it’s a mix of glamour and casual that works so well together. Plus I’m a big fan of black and gold together, so the black clutch is a good match.
Rooney Mara in Givenchy Haute Couture
There’s something oddly satisfying about a dress that’s symmetrical as this one, especially since it’s incredibly detailed. Like Daisy’s dress, I could pour over this for a while just staring at the design. Rooney’s complexion is always perfect for a dark lip, and the combo with her hair in a high bun is totally working for me.
Lady Gaga in Brandon Maxwell
This bitch continues her Gagaissance by wearing a jumpsuit/pantsuit/cape ? to the red carpet and I am HERE FOR IT. Her hair is channelling classic Hollywood and the make-up isn’t over the top either. Love her.
Honorable Mention: Common because heLLLOOOOO SMOKESHOW ❤ ❤
Worst Dressed
Molly’s Picks
Kerry Washington in Versace
Between the slit, the leather, and the dominatrix-y stirrup thingies, I just don’t like this. Which brings me to: maybe we should call this something other than “worst dressed,” because this isn’t necessarily BAD, I just don’t care for it. As always, Kerry’s hair and makeup are perfect.
Sandy Powell
I’m not sure if this belongs on worst dressed, because this is a costume designer paying tribute to the off-the-wall costuming of the patron saint of individualism in fashion, David Bowie. So let’s say that it’s questionably red carpet appropriate, but her heart is in the right place.
Kate Winslet in Ralph Lauren
Look no further for evidence that everyone looked really great last night: there were few dresses that I disliked that I was forced to put Kate Winslet on my worst dressed list. Her hair and makeup are nice, the silhouette of the gown is good, and my only qualm is that fabric. I’ve mentioned a few times that I wish Melissa McCarthy wouldn’t wear that garbage bag fabric so often, and here it is on Kate Winslet. Call it a pet peeve.
Mindy Kaling in Elizabeth Kennedy
See what I mean about not having any dresses I dislike? Mindy Kaling? I LOVE Mindy Kaling! I don’t even hate this dress! I just don’t love it as much as some of the other gowns from last night. It’s a pretty good dress! The back of it is amazing! The tailoring just feels a bit off, and that’s not even Mindy’s fault. I love Mindy Kaling! Ugh. That felt gross. I hated doing that.
Rachel McAdams in August Getty
Now I’m not even pretending to pick bad dresses. I love this color, I love this cut, her eyes pop, the simple earrings are amazing, I’m glad her hair is back. It’s just one of those terribly disappointing moments when you (Rachel McAdams) realize that the otherwise perfect dress you’re wearing wrinkles when you sit. I hate when that happens!
Dishonorable mention:Heidi Klum, who at this point is probably just trolling us that she can wear this puffy tulle thing and STILL look better than most of us could possibly look on our best day.
Traci’s Picks
Heidi Klum in Marchesa
It’s just so bad I had to put it on here twice.
Jacqueline West
If you’re wondering who this is, Jacqueline is a costume designer who was nominated for The Revenant. Like Sandy Powell, I just don’t understand why costume designers wear unflattering things like this. You can see her slip – but is it meant to do that? Maybe I just don’t get the *art* of it.
Reese Witherspoon in Oscar de la Renta
I love Reese like every other American. But this top is just not working for me. It makes her boobs look lumpy and I don’t like that the boning is kind of outlined on the corset. And I’m not feeling the color. It also reminds me of the Louis Vuitton dress she wore to the 2013 Oscars that’s kind of similar to this. Except that gown was better.
Sofia Vergara in Marchesa
Again, I love Sofia Vergara. She is an American treasure. And you have to appreciate someone who knows their body so well that they know what dresses look great on them. Sofia is constantly in a strapless gown, which can kind of get old, but she still looks gorgeous. However, this gown has too much fabric around the waist and I’m not feeling the embellishments scattered throughout. Bring back more like this pink number at the SAGs , pls.
Gwen Stefani in Yanina Couture
Ok, this is technically at the Vanity Fair after party, but still Oscars related. Gwen. What in the fresh hell is this? Apparently sheer dresses with designs/floral covering the private bits is a trend as of late, but ugh. This is too much.
The 2015 Awards Season finally came to an end last night as Neil Patrick Harris sang and danced his way into our homes, Birdman “flew high” with a lot of awards and all the punny headlines, and Adele Dazeem finally got back at Glom Gazingo, who managed to be even creepier than ever before.
So as we take one last look at last night’s Oscars (which you can relive with our live blog here), we break down our favorite and not-so-favorite looks from Hollywood’s big night. Did your faves make the cut? Or were they snubbed like The Lego Movie and everything is actually not awesome?
Best Dressed
Molly’s Picks
Margot Robbie in Saint Laurent
Usually a black dress wouldn’t make my list, but we were seeing so much white and color last night that it was refreshing. This was like a modern take on the 1930s vamp look, and the red lip and vintage ’30s tassel necklace added just enough color. Sometimes loose hair can look too undone at the Oscars, but at this length it’s perfect.
Rosamund Pike in Givenchy
I’m in the fashion minority, but I don’t really like contour dresses. They always make me think of wearing a dress that has an outline of where a skinnier person could fit. But that’s when they do a full-body effect. The satin inserts draw her waist in, but it’s not obvious. I keep zooming in to look at the texture. They always say it’s hard to wear red on the red carpet, but it was a gamble worth taking here.
Lupita Nyong’o in Calvin Klein Collection
Only Lupita is so lovely and precious that she would wear a dress made entirely of pearls. You know, because she’s a pearl of a girl. Hi. I’m your grandpa. The light hit this beautifully. One article called this a Josephine Baker look and it totally is – 1920s but not a full flapper getup or anything. Also I cannot imagine how uncomfortable it must be to wear a dress made of 6,000 pearls.
Reese Witherspoon in Tom Ford
In some lights this was white, in others ice blue. Anyone want to weigh in? I’m on the “ever so slightly blue” side myself, but not in this photo. In any event, on a night when beading and tulle seemed to be the order of the day (not complaining!) this simple look was a nice change of pace. Witherspoon was promoting the #AskHerMore campaign last night, by the way, so for once we actually got to hear more questions about her portrayal of the awesome Cheryl Strayed and fewer questions about her ensemble.
Jennifer Lopez in Elie Saab
The rest of my true Top 5 is covered in Traci’s list below, so why not cover someone who ALMOST made the cut? J.Lo always looks like some sort of modern princess, but the asymmetrical beading/accent work keeps her from looking too Cinderella/Belle/Whatever. If I had a magic wand I’d lose about an inch of fabric from the bottom – the pooling is nice but it was hard for her to walk in. And I’d put that inch of fabric on the inside of the neckline – the plunge is fantastic but it’s just thatmuch too bare on the inside.
Traci’s Picks
Anna Kendrick in Thakoon
Oh goddess that is Anna Kendrick. This is one of my favorite looks from her – ever. The coral color is a perfect compliment to her paler complexion and the halter/keyhole combo is simple yet elegant and on point for the Oscars. She really is a princess.
Jennifer Aniston in Versace
Just call this Jen’s ‘Suck it for not nominating me’ gown. Despite the fact she got left out of the running this year, she still managed to look better than a lot of the other nominees in this stunning gold beaded gown. It’s a simple strapless dress, but the swooping lines and shiny touches are just enough to make you admire in awe.
Emma Stone in Elie Saab
OSCAR NOMINEE Gemma Skrones (I honestly can’t stop saying her name like that ever since Andrew Garfield called her that) is looking divine in this lime green *backless* number from Elie Saab. Paired with her gorge hair, it’s a great modern day take on old school Hollywood glamour, and I’m into it.
David Oyelowo in Dolce & Gabanna
The men’s trend this year was Not Black Tuxes, there were a handful of white suits (see Grand Budapest Hotel contingent) and Jared Leto Lavender, but nothing compared to David Oyelowo. Like Jennifer Aniston before him, David opted to wear his ‘suck it’ suit, and went with a bold dark red (crimson?) suit by Dolce & Gabbana that made him stand out from the crowd, despite the fact he didn’t get a nomination. But listen, I think Selma and everyone involved won the moment John Legend and Common stepped on the stage. So win/win.
Zoe Saldana in Atelier Versace
This champagne dress is beautifully made on its own, but add that to the fact that Zoe produced two – TWO – humans a mere three months ago and she managed to go on the red carpet and look like this. Hot freaking mama.
I really loved this until she turned around and I saw the butt-panel, too.
Gwyneth Paltrow in Ralph & Russo
Apparently Gwyneth is 42, which is not at all old, but I always think of her as a 20-something because she imprinted in my head during the Shakespeare In Love era. This dress is the same color as her iconic pink Oscar gown, and I almost really like it except that the shoulder reminds me of cabbage. Otherwise flawless.
Lady Gaga in Alaia
First of all, I know that it’s Lady Gaga so we aren’t really judging her on the same criteria as everyone else. Still, I saw this and my heart sank a little. You haven’t been hearing that much about her, and then she shows up in dishwashing gloves. I was never a superfan but I always thought she seemed like such a nice gal and I was hoping for a career reboot. Then she KILLED the Sound Of Music tribute and this look faded to the recesses of my memory.
Keira Knightley in Valentino
She’s pregnant, so it doesn’t even seem fair to place her on this list. If I’m ever pregnant I’m probably going to be dressed in sweatpants and frustration from the moment my clothes stop fitting. But the scalloped bodice and floaty florals look like a maternity flower girl dress. Knightley looked gorge at the Vanity Fair party, so she ended the evening on a high note. And dress aside, holy cow, she really IS glowing.
Scarlett Johansson in Versace
I have relatives who STILL buy me things in green because when I was a kid it was my favorite color. It’s weird to have a favorite color as an adult, but I still love it. And this dress is the perfect shade for ScarJo, and it’s really well-tailored, too. But then that necklace looks like it was poached from a Muppet’s neck-ruff or something. So close/so far.
Traci’s Picks
Julianne Moore in Chanel
I’d like to preface this by saying I adore Julianne Moore and think she deserves all the accolades and praise she’s received over the years, especially with her first Oscar last night. But. Woof. It’s not an ‘Oscar-winning dress’ and it’s really not a dress that anyone should wear. ever. The beading is impressive, however the design itself is no bueno. She should’ve gone with a green dress like from the SAGs earlier this year.
Laura Dern in Alberta Ferretti
Once a Gladiator, Always a Gladiator. In a literal suit of armor.
Felicity Jones in Alexander McQueen
Felicity seems like a delightful, British gal, but it’s almost as if she took one of those fashion design stencil plates and mix and matched a top and bottom that don’t actually go together. A for effort though, I guess.
Behati Prinsloo in Armani Prive
I never get how models can just not hit the mark on the red carpet. It’s their actually job to sell clothes, but when they wear a dress like this, it’s hard to sell. And the thing is that she’s a beautiful girl, but with that weird large necklace and slicked back hair, none of it is working for her.
Blanca Blanco
I don’t really know who this is. I don’t know who designed her dress. But this is like Cinna’s first draft of Katniss’ Girl on Fire gown but decided it was too disgusting for the Games.
(Dis)Honorable Mention: John Travolta in this chain necklace. What in the world.
Hi friendos! It’s Hollywood’s biggest night tonight and we’ll be by your side to give you the play by play for all 10 hours of it! Just kidding. It’s more like 8. Either way, we’ll be starting our live blog at 7pm EST/4pm PST, so watch this space for updates.
As always, please refresh your browser window periodically to load our up-to-the-minute commentary. You can also follow us on Twitter for updates in 140 characters or less at @cookiessangria (a button linking directly to our Twitter is conveniently located in the sidebar!).
And watch this video of this year’s host, Neil Patrick Harris slaying at the 2013 Tony Awards. He’s obviously the king of awards shows, and this proves it. I confess I always cry when it gets to around the 5:40 mark. I mean Harvey Fierstein is crying, come on! I can’t wait to see what he does for the Oscars!
M: As of 6:30, the E! preshow is like a scene in a sitcom where they’re putting on a school play, and the kid isn’t on stage for his cue, and the piano keeps playing the intro over and over until he shows up. A lot of stalling as they wait for celebrities to speak with them.
From what I’m seeing, Margot Robbie is wearing a deep-necked black number that isn’t the sort of thing that usually makes my best dressed list, but it just might this time.
Anna Kendrick has a gorgeous pink-coral gown and looks exactly like you’d hope an actress who just played Cinderella would look.
And then the men are just wearing tuxes or whatever.
… which is the perfect segue to discuss #AskHerMore, the hashtag/movement spearheaded, in part, by our favs at Amy Poehler’s Smart Girls. The concept being that women on the red carpet are asked about their outfits but not the work they’re actually nominated for. Now, I do like knowing what people are wearing – and when dresses are comped/borrowed in exchange for plugging the designer, it’s also partially a business exchange. But, ask about the dress then move onto other things? Great! However, I don’t think that Ryan Seacrest asking Dakota Johnson what props she took home from 50 Shades Of Gray is quite what they had in mind.
The Theory of Everything was the first time I really saw Felicity Jones, and this is probably a weird comment but her teeth are adorable. And she and Marion Cotillard have like bubbly polka dots, almost? Is that a trend? I’m old.
T: HI. STILL NOT OVER THE MAGIC THAT IS LUPITA. A FREAKING ANGEL EVERYWHERE SHE GOES. Can she win tonight without even being nominated?
M: As far as I’m concerned, Lupita Nyong’o is winning every day of her life.
T: So I am lit’rally 10 minutes away from the Oscars right now, and I can tell you that it JUST starting raining again after an on/off morning. Also, it’s unusually “cold” (sorry East Coasters, feel free to smack me through the computer screen) here, so I can only imagine these people, especially the gals, freezing on the red carpet right now. YES I SAID FREEZING.
M: Yeah, I was sitting here thinking “don’t type cold… don’t type cold.” NEGATIVE 12 BEFORE WINDCHILL. Rain is a bummer though.
T: Listen. Cold is relative. It’s been scientifically proven that your body acclimates to the weather around you. Hence, 50s-60s is cold for the average 70-80s weather in Los Angeles.
M: I don’t think the human body can acclimate to negative temperatures. Mine just, like, quits. John Legend says that he’s a “Gucci man” and it looks like Chrissy Teagan is a coochie lady. As in I can almost see hers. Because her dress is slit, like, to her waist.
T: Um Zoe Saldana had a baby 3 MONTHS AGO and looks better than I have or ever will wtf
M: * Two. TWO BABIES. She looks great though. She somehow looks less tired as the mother of baby twins than I do as just an adult trying to function as a human.
M: Why is Chloe* Kardashian here and why is she wearing Samantha Parkington’s Christmas dress? Although she’s talking about her car spinning out last week, and that happened to me last year and my car was nearly totalled, and that shit is scary. But that still doesn’t mean you get to go to the Oscar’s red carpet.
* I realize that it’s Khloe but come on, that’s stupid.
Oooh and now she’s shitting on Anna Kendrick’s dress. Don’t step, Kardashian.
T: Kerry Washington ::emoji with heart eyes:: Honestly, sometimes I’m not that into her gowns but I will always always fangirl after her.
M: I appreciate that she’s always willing to try something different, but the top of it looked like a Fancy Lady Church Suit fabric. But she still looked better than your favs.
T: I just realized there’s still an hour before the show even BEGINS. Hunker down folks. Ration out the vodka and popcorn.
M: I’m already tired! I zoned out for a second because I was typing. Is that lady in the pink dress on E! Baby Spice??
She also looks like the little blonde one in Celtic Woman that they make dance around with a fiddle.
T: I have to also watch the Oscars.com red carpet for work and they’re actually interviewing the sound mixers from American Sniper… I mean kudos but… really?
M: I feel like they must have thought they were someone else. Also I couldn’t even come up with an intelligent question to ask them. “So, what does it… sound… like?”
T: They talked about the movie being successful. Nothing abound sound mixing. Probably a sign you shouldn’t be interviewing the sound mixers? #NoShadeToSoundMixers
M: Does that mean they’re giving that award out tonight? Lord give me strength.
We have now reached the part where the E! ladies talk about dresses and um… I don’t know. I’ll say what dresses I like and don’t like, but they’re a little mean. And not in the sassy old lady way Joan Rivers could be.
T: “Good luck tonight, BIRDMEN! Maybe you’ll be flying tonight! ….. Right??” Ugh whoever this person is on ABC.com talking to the Birdman sound mixers trying to make a punny joke. Yes, that’s two sound mixer interviews so far.
M: I’m trying really hard to make it known that I’m NOT throwing shade to sound mixers. I love when a movie sounds nice. Mix-wise. But umm…
M: E! just showed a far-away still shot of Chris Pratt helping Anna Farris out of a limo and even that maybe made me swoon a bit. What a lovely couple.
Speaking of adorable couples, Joanna Newsom and Andy Samberg.
And the only time I’ve read anything worthwhile on the E! news scroll: all of the sisters of the traveling pants are going to be godmothers to the other sister of the traveling pants’ baby. I missed the beginning of the message so, guys, it’s whomever is the pregnant one.
T: Props to JK Simmons to wearing a fedora on the night he *wins an Oscar* He’s also wearing a handkerchief that matches his wife’s dress. The Oscars = Hollywood’s prom, y’all.
Also, have you guys seen Damien Chazelle, the director of Whiplash? He’s 30 years old. The youngest director to be nominated. And only a year older than me. HE LOOKS LIKE A BABY.
M: He’s THIRTY? He looks like Seth Freaking Cohen. Ugh it’s so hard now that people are age are accomplishing big things; it doesn’t feel like there should even have been enough time between birth and now to get that far.
M: One shot I saw made it look like Jessica Chastain was wearing full-leg spanx. It looked like there was a nude-colored hemline at her ankle.
T: I’d probably wearing a full-body Spank (?) if I was on the red carpet at the Oscars. Luckily for everyone, that will never happen.
M: Look. If you could spanx your face so it stayed in the right non-creepy, attractive position the whole night, I’d even do that. I mean I guess Botox does that.
T: Because Big Hero 6 is nominated, the movie’s stars are obvi there, including Damon Wayans Jr. and Scott Adsit (Pete from 30 Rock) and it’s like.. weird to see them there? I feel like they should be on their respective sitcoms, even the dearly departed 30 Rock.
M: Between them and Pratt, I sort of love that my favorite sitcoms are represented. Oh! And Andy Samberg. But it is weird. Like seeing a teacher at the mall-weird.T: OH MY GOD A FILM EDITING NOMINEE IS TALKING ABOUT SPECS ABOUT CAMERAS HE USED FOR GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL. Who even.
M: You may think Traci works in entertainment news but like… come on, are you writing for a really specific trade journal or something? Why are they making you watch this? I’m so sorry and amused.
T: I think there were supposed to be more celebs on it? They ran out of people to interview, I guess, because this pre-show has been going on since Tuesday (I’m assuming)
M: Meanwhile on TV, they’re talking to Faith Hill and Tim McGraw. I feel like I’m watching any one of those weekly country music awards ceremonies.
M: Now that I’ve switched to ABC, I’m getting a second look at some actors. Like Kerry Washington. Her eye makeup is gorgeous and I didn’t notice that before.
Lady Gaga, who is I guess still famous? looks like a character from The Wizard Of Oz. The weird book series, not the movie. Like she’d be a fancy bird that sits on a clock or something. She also has developed a vaguely European accent. [And yet. She always seems like such a NICE person.]
T: CHRIS M’FIN EVANS. He brought his BFF Tara from home. Also brought his beard. And his handsomeness. God bless.
M: I have not seen a single Marvel movie (that’s the thing? with the heroes?) but I absolutely love him.
T: Yes! I have seen Iron Man. And Iron Man 2…. Guardians of the Galaxy is on its way from Netflix. I LOVE TELEVISION.
T: This is Lorelei Linklater from Boyhood, who has been absent from most of the awards show circuit, but WHO is that boy.
T: LITERAL LOL for the “best and whitest” joke.
GUYS I LOVE NPH AND SINGING ANNA KENDRICK ANNA KENDRICK ANNA KENDRICK
M: SUCK IT KARDASHIAN.
For the folks at home, my dog just basically peed herself (it’s this weird hormonal thing, she’s house trained, NO1Curr.) Oscars opening number is the worst time ever to have to clean up a dog’s pee fur.
T: Also, glad I watched Gone Girl on Valentine’s Day (romantic) because seriously would’ve been spoiled during the ‘slit his throat’ line during this opening.
M: It didn’t even register that that was a spoiler but yeah, glad I read it first (which will TOTALLY spoil the movie once I get around to it.)
Can we get a lip read on Oprah after NPH told her she was rich?
I don’t listen to audio books, but if Lupita Nyong’o read them I’d listen to the entire Bible.
Best Supporting Actor
Robert Duvall, The Judge
Ethan Hawke, Boyhood
Edward Norton, Birdman
Mark Ruffalo, Foxcatcher
J.K. Simmons, Whiplash
Traci’s Pick: J.K. Simmons, Whiplash
I’m kind of scared to watch Whiplash based on the one clip I’ve seen of JK Simmons bullying the crap out of Miles Teller. I’m not good at disobeying authority figures.
Molly’s Pick: J.K Simmons, Whiplash
I did see Whiplash and it’s exactly like Traci said.
Winner: J.K. Simmons, Whiplash
M: I mean, he seems very nice in real life. He wants us to call our parents.
T: NO FEDORA?! COME ON JK SIMMONS. IT WAS YOUR MOMENT.
I also like that we can see Jared Leto super clearly because of his amazing lavender suit.
I also like that NPH gets to show off his magic skills during the show.He’s really really good.
M: Remember this two-minute bit about a suitcase locked in a box when the show is 10 minutes over and they cut all of the major winners off after 30 seconds.
I have trouble understanding how Dakota Johnson is here.
SO BORED during Adam Levine’s song. It’s a fine song, the lighting design is good, but the show is only 20 minutes in and it already feels like a long one.
Best Costume Design
Milena Canonero, The Grand Budapest Hotel
Mark Bridges, Inherent Vice
Colleen Atwood, Into the Woods
Anna B. Sheppard and Jane Clive, Maleficent
Jacqueline Durran, Mr. Turner
Traci’s Pick: Colleen Atwood, Into the Woods
Colleen has been nominated in this category 11 times and has won thrice, and her fabulous fantasy forest couture could win her the fourth.
Molly’s Pick: Colleen Atwood, Into The Woods
From Cinderella’s Delia*s ball dress to Jack’s little Swedish Burberry model outfit, these costumes were perfection.
Winner: Milena Canonero, The Grand Budapest Hotel
M: Actually, that’s pretty fair.
M: NPH, you’re so cute you don’t need to scrunch your nose when you smile.
T: So The Grand Budapest Hotel is winning a lot of awards tonight, then? I mean, okay.
These young Oscar winners or whatever Channing Tatum is introducing make me feel like if I were up there, I’d probably burst out crying. Meryl Streep AND LUPITA?? I’d die.
M: This Polish director of Ida is so adorable.
T: …Is it weird that whenever I hear Mauritania, I think of the boat that picked up the survivors of the Titanic?
M: Wasn’t the Mauritania the one at the beginning when Sassy Rose is like “it doesn’t look any bigger than the Mauritania?” then Cal has to be a dick and tell us like exactly how much longer the Titanic is?
Hi. My name is Molly and I watched Titanic so many times in 6th grade that I still have it memorized.
T: Yes. That is correct. Us with Titanic:
M: I hope this seat filler isn’t going to get in trouble for acknowledging her existence.
T: I love you Steve Carrell, but I was distracted trying to figure out if that was Idris Elba behind him.
M: Ha what, Tegan and Sara and Lonely Island are performing Everything Is Awesome? And now I’m going to have this in my head all night.
T: THE LONELY ISLAND. THESE FOLKS ARE PERFORMING ON THE OSCARS RIGHT NOW:
❤ Jorma ❤
Also, GOLDEN GLOBE WINNER ANDY SAMBERG
QUESTLOVE! IS THIS THE REAL DEVO GUY
M:I didn’t stop smiling through the whole number. Like mouth-open smiling. LEGO OSCAR THAT THEY GAVE TO OPRAH. Everything is awesome. Everyone in the crowd is making the same dopey grin that I am.
M: I don’t know what the seating situation is at the Oscars with much specificity, but maybe don’t put the nominees in the balcony? The guy who won for short film just said “crikey” and then said that the statuette was heavy “because we’re only little.” Bless.
T: I want to talk like this donut dude for the rest of the night.
M: Or TO him, maybe? Like he could do some of that lame banter they give to the presenters.
Kerry Washington is not joking even a little bit about pronouncing the foreign nominees’ names properly. Smarter than your favs, too.
M: Gwyneth Paltrow, you may be beautiful and classy, but your sleeve still looks like cabbage.
T: Honestly, guys, Country Strong wasn’t THAT bad. Just me? Okay.
M: I thought it was all right. Am I supposed to admit that? Oh well.
T: I AM ACTUALLY CLAPPING OUT LOUD FOR NPH RN.
T: Oh good the sound mixing/editing categories!!!!
M: Any predictions or favorites?
T: Whoever was interviewed earlier. I don’t think it was these guys? Ugh who knows. #AllWhiteMenLookTheSame
M: Particularly white men over the age of 60 or so. And white babies. It’s like all white people start life looking the same way, diverge a bit for a little while, then end up at the same place.
T: Oh actually I think American Sniper was one of them. Congrats boys!
M: Now it’s sound editing, which is an entirely different thing from sound mixing. I do not dispute that good sound editing/mixing is integral to a movie, but it also seems like something that might be more comfortable at the technical awards.
M: Jared Leto, wearing a tux the color of his eyes. Which would be fine if his eye were black or off-white. Catalano does what he wants.
T: WWJCD (the other WWJD)
M: Emma Stone holding a Lego Oscar was about the cutest thing ever. And Meryl, not at all nervous because she doesn’t even have to care anymore.
Best Supporting Actress
Patricia Arquette, Boyhood
Laura Dern, Wild
Keira Knightley, The Imitation Game
Emma Stone, Birdman
Meryl Streep, Into the Woods
Traci’s Pick: Patricia Arquette, Boyhood
If there’s one thing I know in life, it’s that I will bet all my monies on Patricia Arquette winning this. Unless Meryl pulls a Meryl.
Molly’s Pick: Patricia Arquette, Boyhood
If only for being willing to film herself aging in real-time for 12 years. Don’t get me wrong, she looks amazing, but that would have been a fear of mine at the outset. But Emma Stone was the best part of Birdman.
Winner: Patricia Arquette
T: Wait I’m crying. GOD BLESS YOU PATRICIA ARQUETTE.
M: I was just going to write WHY AM I CRYING. Which is only weird because usually when winners try to get platform-y I feel a little secondhand embarrassment but nope.
T: Is Rita Ora going to sing Defying Gravity after this??
T: Okay who picked the soundtrack to the walk-out music? They just played Endless Love for the special effect categories.
M: I feel like in the special effects or tech-y categories, there’s always one guy in a Scottish scarf or a kilt or something.
M: THIS MUSIC. That was just “The Time Of My Life.”
T: Hear me out: A rom-com featuring Anna Kendrick and Kevin Hart as best friends who everyone thinks will end up together (a la Mindy and BJ). Hart to Hart? No that’s a thing already.
M: I think a height pun. A Little Bit Of Love. Pint Sized Love. Basically anything that means short and then the word love after it. Small Fry, Big Love.
T: Side note: I want all these hanging edison lights for my home.
Best Animated Feature
Big Hero 6
The Boxtrolls
How to Train Your Dragon 2
Song of the Sea
The Tale of Princess Kaguya
Traci’s Pick: How to Train Your Dragon 2
So the Lego Movie really isn’t going to win?
Molly’s Pick: Big Hero 6
Everything’s NOT awesome. Loved the characters in Big Hero 6, though.
Winner: Big Hero 6
M: I went to this with two of my nephews who hated it, on the advice of two of my other nephews who loved it. So they’re all really cute kids and everything, but now I know which ones have good taste in movies.
M: I think NPH just walked in to “Hey There, Georgie Girl.” Did somebody switch out the orchestra’s sheet music? Or is the musical theme “stuff that had really cheap royalties?”
T: Why s Anna Wintour sitting next to Harvey Weinstein? Why is Anna Wintour sitting at the Oscars? The Devil Wears Prada was in ‘06.
T: PRATT. I adore you.
M: HOOKED ON A FEELING? We’re being punked.
T: I think maybe Hooked on a Feeling had to do with Guardians of the Galaxy? IDK get back to me after I see it.
M: I really want to see it but also am afraid I’ll hate it. Or be bored, at least.
T: I… Love Lift Us Up Where We Belong… for IDRIS???
M: What if these are just being planned by someone with a great sense of humor, trying to give us all something silly to pay attention during this 9-hr-long show? Probably not. These are so all over the place that it almost seems like they’re part of the code. Maybe the titles form an acrostic.
T: Someone get Benedict Cumberbatch to solve this immediately. (That was an Imitation Game AND Sherlock ref. You’re welcome).
T: Is it rude to ask if Meryl just got an Oscar for the intro to the In Memoriam tribute?
M: I was watching it wondering if she was emotional or just a really good actress? Such is the difficulty of anything involving Meryl. Like, credit card rep listening to Meryl say that she “mailed it last week” or a dentist hearing that Meryl “flosses every day” would have no way to know if it was the truth.
T: Shout out to all of Meryl’s doctors, business people, and local grocers.
T: When did Batfleck get there???
Does Terrence Howard think this presentation is an audition … wait what happened. did the teleprompter go out? DOES JOHN TRAVOLTA HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS??
M: I’m almost positive that it did so he had to cover by pretending to be overcome with emotion.
T: NPH, I love you but you keep saying “Oyelowo” wrong. Did Brad Pitt teach you nothing?
M: I had to google whether I had been saying it wrong this whole time. I have not. It isn’t even hard to say properly?
T: Oh-YEH-Low-Whoa (i mean not correct phonetic spelling, but whatevs)
M: And I’m very well-versed in that look of panic people get when they have to read off your last name and don’t know how (see: my whole life having 4 consecutive silent letters in my surname), so I tend to cut people a break when they stumble a little. But you’re on TV. Show some respect for TV.
T: omg they just played Dreamgirls for Octavia Spencer’s walk-out… As she talks about Selma
M: I’m at two times crying tonight. Once at Patricia Arquette’s glorious mic-drop speech, and the second during the performance of Glory. Particularly when it was over and Oyelowo was crying.
T: *What Molly said because I am still crying and snotting right now.
M: New life goal: never get my chin cradled at close range by a Scientologist? WAIT what is his necklace.
T: Or just never get close to a Scientologist.
Best Original Song
“Everything Is Awesome” from The Lego Movie; Music and Lyric by Shawn Patterson
“Glory” from Selma; Music and Lyric by John Stephens and Lonnie Lynn
“Grateful” from Beyond the Lights; Music and Lyric by Diane Warren
“I’m Not Gonna Miss You” from Glen Campbell…I’ll Be Me; Music and Lyric by Glen Campbell and Julian Raymond
“Lost Stars” from Begin Again; Music and Lyric by Gregg Alexander and Danielle Brisebois
Traci’s Pick: Glory from Selma
Despite the fact I would really love to see The Lonely Island get an Oscar, I’m totally fine with seeing Common and John Legend up there lookin foine and winning their first Oscars.
Molly’s Pick: Everything Is Awesome from The Lego Movie
I really think Glory is the likely winner, but I want to see Lego win something. IDK what Begin Again is, but Danielle Brisebois is the original Molly from Annie, so that’s fun.
Winner: Glory
M: If Common were a preacher, I’d start going to church. * I don’t know whether to count this as a separate cry or a continuation of my last one.
M: Gaga singing The Sound Of Music… was not expecting it to go down like this.
T: Friendly reminder Gaga went to NYU (the special theatre school) for musical theatre.
M: Aww, I’ve never cared too much about Gaga (except I heard Poker Face today and remember that it was really fun when that album first came out)… but this is just darling. I honestly didn’t expect to like this. But on the east coast it’s also 11:20 so maybe they don’t have to do ALL the songs. Nothing’s that charming.
T: CRY COUNT 3! Although Glory counted as like 20. CRY COUNT 4 OMG OMG OMG OMG JULIE FREAKING ANDREWS. ROYALTY ON STAGE, Y’ALL.
Back to Gaga for a second – I’m SO glad she got to have this moment because people are quick to dismiss her because of her crazy outfits and pop music, but she’s a fantastic, impressive singer, and she got to show that tonight. 143 Gaga.
M: If you took a photo of me right now my eyeballs would have stars or hearts in them. (Plus still some tears.)
T: Everyone was clapping along to that Grand Budapest score in rhythm.
T: Oh my GOD you guys – WILL ARNETT WAS IN THE BATMAN COSTUME DURING THE EVERYTHING IS AWESOME PERFORMANCE
M: NOO REALLY?!?! Because I’m a celebrity creeper: I bet Archie and Abel flipped the heck out about that.
T: Archie and Abel are lit’rally the luckiest kids in the world
Best Original Screenplay
Birdman, Alejandro G. Iñárritu, Nicolás Giacobone, Alexander Dinelaris, Jr. & Armando Bo
Boyhood, Richard Linklater
Foxcatcher, E. Max Frye and Dan Futterman
The Grand Budapest Hotel, Wes Anderson & Hugo Guinness
Nightcrawler, Dan Gilroy
Traci’s Pick: The Grand Budapest Hotel
My record for liking Wes Anderson’s films is not that good, but I will say Grand Budapest was entertaining and I actually paid attention to what was happening. Only he could create this specific world of a European mystery adventure thriller with a backdrop dreams are made of.
Molly’s Pick: Birdman
Birdman, while probably technically very good, just didn’t do it for me. But I’m usually really into Wes Anderson and Grand Budapest wasn’t my fav. And the strength of Boyhood wasn’t really in the script. And I didn’t see the other movies.
Winner: Birdman
Best Adapted Screenplay
American Sniper, Jason Hall
The Imitation Game, Graham Moore
Inherent Vice, Paul Thomas Anderson
The Theory of Everything, Anthony McCarten
Whiplash, Damien Chazelle
Traci’s Pick: The Imitation Game
I have not seen any of these movies. This is total educated guess.
Molly’s Pick: The Theory of Everything, Anthony McCarten
So, I saw three of these, but haven’t read the books/whatever they were adapted from… this was a fantastic screenplay though.
Winner: The Imitation Game
M: That was totally deserved so I’m trying not to be TOO jealous that the writer looks to be possibly younger than we are.
T: CRY COUNT 5. THIS GUY NEEDS TO BE MY BEST FRIEND.
M: He’s such a cutie. At this point the crowd is like Catholic mass-status with all the sitting and standing.
T: So instead of giving Ben Affleck a nomination for directing Argo , he just gets to present the same award to some other white dude?
M: It’s like if I went back to our high school to announce prom queen.
[ Did we even have that?]
T: […Yes?]
Best Director
Alejandro Gonzalez Iñárritu, Birdman
Richard Linklater, Boyhood
Bennett Miller, Foxcatcher
Wes Anderson, The Grand Budapest Hotel
Morten Tyldum, The Imitation Game
Traci’s Pick: Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu
Like best picture, it’s really down to Boyhood and Birdman for the big categories, and based on the fact Birdman has all those long uncut scenes, I’m going with Alejandro.
Molly’s Pick: Richard Linklater
Maybe it’s gimicky, but Boyhood was a novel approach that actually worked.
Winner: Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu
M: I’m actually sort of embarrassed that I wasn’t into Birdman. I do understand why it was good, but, meh.
T: Didn’t see it. Feel like I should.
M: You can watch it on demand now, so that’s something. OH GOD. It’s 11:45. Come on. This is like the west coast’s revenge: for once, the east coast is stuck watching things at inconvenient times.
The west coast’s other revenge is that right now if you go outside on the east coast, there are actual warnings on the news to let you know you might Jack Dawson. (To Jack Dawson = to die by freezing)
T: Still can’t get over Steve Carell being nominated for an Oscar.
Best Actor
Steve Carell, Foxcatcher
Bradley Cooper, American Sniper
Benedict Cumberbatch, The Imitation Game
Michael Keaton, Birdman
Eddie Redmayne, The Theory of Everything
Traci’s Pick: David Oyelowo, Selma Eddie Redmayne, The Theory of Everything
It’s either Eddie or Michael Keaton, but I think Eddie has the slightest of edges because of his role as Stephen Hawking. It’s technically a bit more challenging and dodgier than playing an actor. It’s like Kate Winslet’s Holocaust/Oscars theory, but for disabled people. (was that PC?)
Molly’s Pick: Eddie Redmayne, The Theory of Everything
The thing that Traci said is right, though. And it wasn’t just how Redmayne captured Hawing’s physical impairments, but the whole — ugh, sorry, “emotional journey” of the character.
Winner: Eddie Redmayne
T: HE IS THE CUTEST.
M: Romcom where Eddie Redmayne and Lupita Nyong’o meet in some sort of a doctoral program and are fierce academic rivals but ultimately find love?
T: The Report Card. No. The Dean’s List. No. Grade A. Ugh I’m bad at this.
M: PINT SIZED LOVE. No we already used that.
Best Actress
Marion Cotillard, Two Days One Night
Felicity Jones, The Theory of Everything
Julianne Moore, Still Alice
Rosamund Pike, Gone Girl
Reese Witherspoon, Wild
Traci’s Pick: Julianne Moore, Still Alice
She needs this. WE need this. THE WORLD NEEDS THIS.
Molly’s Pick: Julianne Moore, Still Alice
This falls under the “probably too sad to watch” category for me.
Winner: Julianne Moore
M: It’s midnight. I have a meeting to run first thing in the morning. NPH, this bit with your predictions is not endearing you to me.
Best Picture
American Sniper
Birdman
Boyhood
The Grand Budapest Hotel
The Imitation Game
Selma
The Theory of Everything
Whiplash
Traci’s Pick: Birdman
I keep changing my choice but let’s go with Birdman BUT BOYHOOD SHOULD WIN BECAUSE the story may be simple, but it’s every person’s story, and that’s why it’s impressive. Theoretically, a story about a family over the course of 12 years shouldn’t be this interesting, but with the divorce, marriage, abusive husbands, relationships, puberty, etc. these actors make you actually feel like you’re part of their lives. And an Oscar should be a part of theirs.
Molly’s Pick: Boyhood
This is a year without one clear winner. The movies I actually enjoyed the most were The Imitation Game, The Theory of Everything and Whiplash. But Boyhood did something that sounds so simple that it’s amazing nobody had attempted it before. It sounds like the top two picks are Boyhood and Birdman, and I think a larger proportion of the academy might vote for Boyhood.
Winner: Birdman
Thanks for sticking with us, everyone! We’ll be back tomorrow with our best and worst dressed picks!
M: I went to this with two of my nephews who hated it, on the advice of two of my other nephews who loved it. So they’re all really cute kids and everything, but now I know which ones have good taste in movies.
Cookies + Sangria 