Show You Should Be Watching If You Aren’t Already: Master of None

I’ve said it before on this blog, but I’ll say it again. I watch a lot of television. Like, I have an app on my phone to help me remember when everything is on so I don’t miss anything type of obsession. That being said, I’ve seen a lot of programs in my day, but nothing has quite affected me like Master of None.

Basic Plot

Loosely based on Aziz Ansari’s life, he plays Dev, a 30-something actor in New York City, navigating between his professional and personal life, romance, and identity.

To be honest, after first watching the trailer, I was just expecting another comedy from Aziz Ansari. I knew he was re-teaming with Parks and Rec alums  – creator Mike Schur, writers Alan Yang and the late Harris Wittels – to produce it, so I knew if anything, the writing was going to be fantastic. I didn’t think twice about the actors and subject matter he chose to feature. I knew I was going to watch it no matter what, but I was pleasantly surprised by the content matter and show as a whole after watching the pilot.

Like the trailer above, the first scene of the series features Aziz and former SNL featured player Noel Wells mid-coitus. The setup feels akin to a Seth Rogen/Judd Apatow joint (no pun intended), but as you watch the rest of the episode unfold, you realize it’s much more than that.

Dev, a single guy, goes to his friends’ kid’s birthday party in the same ep, and a show you initially thought was going to be a crude look at relationships, turns into a deeper look into friendships with friends who have children, friendships with friends who have no children, the inner debate of whether you should or are even mentally able to have children, and so on and so forth.

In fact, the evolution of the series itself was somewhat similar, in that when Aziz and Alan originally conceived the show, they focused more on dating as a 20-30 something (Modern Romance, anyone?), but then both of them realized they could speak volumes if they just wrote about their own experiences, personal journeys and backgrounds.

“Neither of us are older white guys. We’re younger minorities, and that does inform our world views in some ways. Not everything is viewed through that prism, but it does affect how we move through society, so we want to be honest about that and put that in the show.” – Alan Yang {x}

And honestly, the way Alan described how he and Aziz viewed Master of None is exactly what I, as an Asian-American millennial, want to see represented in the media. Yes, minorities’ culture should be accurately depicted onscreen, but does that mean I want to see a person of color going on a long, laborious, slightly embarrassing rant about how the white man is trying to take us down? No. But does it mean I would like to see a person of color awkwardly walk into a room of all unexpectedly white people in a professional setting? Yes.

A while ago, I wrote about Fresh of the Boat, and how that show needs to stay on the air for the sole purpose of representation. And luckily it has. FOTB is a comedic take on a Chinese family with immigrant parents in the 90s, and everyone can relate to their dynamics no matter their background. However, it is a sitcom in the truest form, in that it doesn’t necessarily feature the more serious issues that minorities in America deal with daily. Shows like FOTB are like a gateway drug into another culture, letting viewers in middle America slowly get a peek into a different world they might not be familiar with, one joke at a time.

But then there’s something like Master of None, which portrays a culture in a serious light (even though it’s a comedy), in a way that is real and moving, and has a cast that rivals even Shondaland. As previously mentioned, Aziz plays Dev, an Indian-American, and he has a Chinese-American best friend, Brian, played by Kelvin Yu. Their friend circle includes a black lesbian, Denise (Lena Waithe) and Arnold (Eric Wareheim), lit’rally the “token white friend”. Just the mere fact that a TV show has more minorities in the lead roles than white people is already lightyears ahead of most of the programs already on TV. And because it’s created by Aziz and Alan (and probably a lot to do with the fact they’re on Netflix and not a network), they’re not afraid to talk about the lack of POC in media, either.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Again, this speaks to the fact that personal identity isn’t how we view ourselves all the time, it’s just one thing about us that makes us see the world in a different view than others. But it also touches upon the state of media today, and, full circle, what Viola Davis said during her Emmy Award speech in September.

“The only thing that separates women of color from anyone else is opportunity. You cannot win an Emmy for roles that are simply not there.”

People like Shonda Rhimes and Mindy Kaling and Aziz Ansari are creating the roles for POC to break through those barriers, because no one else was creating the content that provided the platform for people like them to shine. No one was developing a show that was featured the life of children of immigrants in an honest fashion, so Aziz and Alan did so (PS: if you haven’t read Aziz’s article in the NY Times about this, do it now! Or I mean, after you finish reading my post. Come on.)

Which leads me to the second episode of Master of None titled Parents, and perhaps the single most important episode of TV I’ve seen in my life. I don’t want to give too much away, but it basically deals with Dev and Brian airing out their grievances about their parents’ requests (‘Fix this thing on my iPhone’, ‘Pick up rice on your way home’), and it’s juxtaposed with their parents’ lives in their native countries prior to immigrating to America. Dev and Brian realize they don’t really know about much about their parents, and spend the second half of the ep learning more about them.

I’m not exaggerating when I say I started crying within the first five minutes of this episode. It hit so close to home, in a way that I’ve never felt about a piece of media before in my life. I’ve obviously related to TV characters such as Lane on Gilmore Girls, but that was because I felt like my parents were the most like the immigrant, super religious, strict Mrs. Kim, not because I was an Asian girl with glasses. In this Parents episode, I saw myself in Dev & Brian’s position, wanting to shrug off my immigrant parents’ simple requests, and often forgetting just how much they gave up to give me a better life. I don’t want to turn this blog into a therapy session, but the episode brought up issues I had already felt lingering before, so to see it manifested in front of me on screen felt like a punch in the gut. A good one, of course.

After watching the episode, I went on Twitter (as one does) to just let the Interwebz know how great and life-changing the show is, even if I was only on the second episode. Lo and behold, look who responded to me:

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Yeah, it’s cool that people are liking his show, but I imagine it’s got to have an even bigger impact on a show creator when viewers are truly connecting with the art they’ve created. To know that you’ve made a difference in someone’s life must be a rewarding experience.

And for Aziz, it seems to be. Yesterday, he posted this sweet post on Tumblr about his dad, who was happy to use almost all of his vacation time to shoot the show. They appeared on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert on Tuesday, and Aziz’s dad told him, “This is all fun and I liked acting in the show, but I really just did it so I could spend more time with you.” Aziz wrote, “I almost instantly collapsed into tears at the thought of how much this person cares about me and took care of me and gave me everything to give me the amazing life I have. I felt like a total piece of garbage for all the times I haven’t visited my parents and told them I wanted to stay in New York cause I’d get bored in SC. I’m an incredibly lucky person and many of you are as well.”

He went on to say how he is “overwhelmed” by the response to the Parents ep, and how writing the ep and filming it with his real parents (who play Dev’s parents) ironically made his relationship better with his parents IRL. If that doesn’t tell you just how powerful the storytelling is in this series, I don’t know what will. I hope this show will be able to reach people like me, who can strongly relate to Dev and Brian, but also, and maybe even more importantly, reach the people who don’t have a similar background. With everything that’s going on in this country on college campuses and in the streets, I think it’s more important than ever to get a sense of what people are going through from “the other side”. Empathy is the catalyst for change and acceptance, and if something like this show can do it for people, then I’d say Aziz certainly is the Master of One.

The entire 10-episode season of Master of None is now streaming on Netflix

Pop Culture Blind Spots: The Rocky Horror Picture Show

It’s been 40 years since The Rocky Horror Picture Show was released and for the past four decade’s it’s been a cult classic. It’s spawned countless stage productions, midnight dress-up movie sing-a-long showings and even a Glee episode. But it’s only been a few weeks since I’ve watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show for the first time.

If you’re just joining us for our Pop Culture Blind Spots series, we basically live blog our first viewing of something we’ve never seen before but we probably should have. So let’s start by sharing my knowledge of Rocky Horror:

  • Susan Sarandon plays an innocent girl
  • Tim Curry is in drag
  • Time Warp is a song. So is Touch a Touch a Touch a Touch Me.
  • I somehow confuse this show with Little Shop of Horrors in my head and often picture Tim Curry with a talking venus flytrap.
  • I guess I don’t really know the plot?

Alright, so here I am, about to watch Rocky Horror and in full disclosure this might not end favorably for Rocky fans. You’ve been warned.

Haven’t even started the movie yet, and I have to decide whether or not to watch the US version or the UK version… apparently the Brits get an extra song called Superheroes, because America hates heroism. Also there’s an option called “I’m frightened”, and I didn’t pick it because WHY ARE THERE SO MANY OPTIONS JUST TO PLAY THE DAMN MOVIE. 

I already hate these talking lips. Literally it’s talking to me during the DVD menu selection. “Everything is in readyness, we nearly await your selection”, it says to me. SHHH.

I feel like we’ve gotten off to a bad start. Let’s collect ourselves and calm down.

Did movies made in 1975 still have credits in the beginning or was this a style choice made specifically for this film? Either way, I appreciate it

The side of the car said “WAIT TIL TONITE SHE GOT HERS NOW HE’LL GET HIS” …. she got her… sex? I’m too young for this movie.
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I was not aware this movie was in black and white.

Janet’s boyfriend is proposing right after a wedding and defaced church property. Poor form all around.

I’ve never heard Susan Sarandon sing before? Gosh she’s pretty and hasn’t aged.

Who is this Hitchcockian character breaking the fourth wall??

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Janet is using a newspaper to cover herself from the pouring rain. First of all, she is completely drenched. Second, the newspaper is made out of some type of waterproof paper because it’s not soggy at all.

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Maybe it’s because it’s 1975, but TBH, if I walked up to a rando house in the middle of the night in a storm and this dude with the balding hair with Dracula voice answered the door, I’d be all, ‘Oh sorry, wrong house BYE’. NOT TONIGHT SIR. 

Is American Gothic a theme here

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There was a star wipe effect. Did someone edit this on Windows Movie Maker

Oh it’s in color now.

This Time Warp scene is like if Cabaret met Grease and they were meeting in Jeckyll and Hyde’s home office. Also, Eyes Wide Shut.

SPEAKING AS A TAP DANCER THIS WOMAN’S TAP DANCING IS HORRENDOUS AND NOT MATCHING WITH THE SOUNDS OF THE TAPS

HOLD UP. THE 20TH CENTURY FOX LOGO SHOWED UP AGAIN AND IT’S THE SAME OPENING FROM THE BEGINNING? IS THIS LIKE GROUNDHOG DAY (which I watched for the first time a couple months ago)

Is my DVD doing something weird because now the credits are in color, as opposed to black and white when I started this shit 20 minutes ago… OK lit’rally this movie just restarted from the beginning to be in color is this what really happens because I’m fast forwarding.

We’ve managed to move past the 20 minute mark without going back to the beginning. Never have I been so excited to see Tim Curry as a transvestite *apologies for saying ‘in drag’ earlier*. Also, Tim Curry has a huge mouth. take that as you will. I’m already obsessed with him.

Also Barry Bostwick was a babe??

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What kind of fuckery is this? A mummy in formaldehyde? Maybe not formaldehyde. But might as well be.

This is horrible but my other prior experience with Rocky Horror is the Glee episode, and I distinctly remember Chord Overstreet in these tight gold lamé underwears.

Guys, TBH I’m like paying half attention and have no idea what’s happening. Why did Meatloaf just crash through the wall of the Tim Curry’s Willy Wonka laboratory on a motorcycle??

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Yoooo did Tim Curry just murder Meatloaf with an axe

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Why is Janet sleeping in a malaria tent?

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Now the Igor hunchback is walking around with a candelabra and throwing the wax on the gold lamé naked guy. Honestly have no idea what’s going on.

Brad just had sex with Tim Curry? And Brad was okay with it? Oh I guess it’s fine because Janet just sought out Gold Lamé to have sex with her.

Dr. Scott is here. It is someone’s birthday. They’ve been having dinner on a table with a dead person in a coffin underneath it. So that’s another normal thing going on at this mansion.

Funniest thing to happen so far: Igor and busty maid laughing hysterically then Igor suddenly reprimanding her: SHUT UP

I’m gonna be honest with y’all – I lost interest around this point. I got distracted, decided not to pause the movie, but didn’t understand what was happening anyways and I probably skipped a a lot of things moving forward.

They’re in a pool now. Having a huge orgy while the dude in the wheelchair is watching from afar. Because at this point, why the hell not.

Why are there lazer guns involved now?

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Are these aliens?

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Oh it’s Igor and what’s her name?? Gold lamé shorts just shook his fist as he’s trying to carry Tim Curry on his back.

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They fell into the poolWHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK IS HAPPENING

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I give up y’all. This isn’t for me. I don’t get it. But respect for those who do. 

Unpopular opinion I’m assuming most people will disagree with:

Rating of Rocky Horror: 1 spear shaped lazer gun (out of like 20)

We Need To Talk Trudeau

This week, our neighbours to the north welcomed a new era of government, when Justin Trudeau, the leader of the Liberal Party was sworn in as prime minister of Canada. And although his election marked the end of nearly a decade of conservatives ruling the country, it also marked a huge generational shift, as JT, at 43 years old, is the second youngest prime minister in Canada’s history.

One of the major results of this is that for the first time ever, the cabinet is comprised of an equal number of men and women. With 15 men and 15 women, the ministers, mostly under the age of 50, represent a huge range of people, including two aboriginal members, three Sikh politicians, two atheists, a blind woman, a paralympic in a wheelchair… couldn’t make this up if I tried. This is great news for Canadians since there’s actually some semblance of what the population of the country looks like representing them in the government.

So when JT was asked why it was so important to him to have a cabinet that is gender balanced, it seemed like a no-brainer answer:

Basically every Canadian and the rest of the world once his answer/this GIF went viral:

My knowledge of JT’s existence only goes back to October when he was officially elected Prime Minister and I saw a pic of him legit clapped (outloud, to no one) to congratulate Canada as a whole. After his Drop The Mic moment on Wednesday’s swearing in ceremony, I needed to know more about him, and you do too. My fellow Americans (and rando other international friends), here is a primer to Prime Minister Trudeau.

Following in His Father’s Footsteps

JT was born when his father, Pierre Trudeau, was serving as the 15th Prime Minister of Canada as part of the Liberal Party. Considered one of the greatest PMs of the country, Pierre was praised not only for his policies and effective reform throughout his 15 years in office, but for his charm and good looks. When he first was elected in 1968, Pierre helped reinvigorate the Liberal Party and Canadian government in general thanks to his youthfulness and breath of fresh air quality he brought to politics, and the term “Trudeaumania” even became a thing.

JT started getting involved in politics in the 2000s shortly after his father died, and of course he drew comparisons to his father, sparking Trudeaumania 2.0. The younger Trudeau holds similar political views and a similar spirit – see Exhibit A: Pierre doing pirouettes behind the Queen’s back at Buckingham Palace during a G7 Summit:

Exhibit B: Justin Trudeau dancing with his wife, Sophie, after being elected the new leader of the Liberal Party. A GIF that was posted on TWITTER that he described as GETTING THEIR GROOVE ON.

Justin is also the first child of a PM to become the head of government in Canada. Think of him as the George W. as opposed to the Jeb!.

I Believe The Children Are Our Future

Growing up, Justin actually shied away from politics, and graduated with two degrees – one in literature and the other in education. He attended McGill University then the University of British Columbia, where he earned a degree in education. He became a teacher, educating Canada’s youth in French and math. I’m betting he was that teacher the girls secretly drew doodles about in their notebooks.

Beat This Acting, Reagan

It’s no Bedtime for Bonzo, but in 2007, JT starred in a two-part miniseries called The Great War, which detailed Canada’s participation in World War I. JT played Talbot Mercer Papineau, a Major who was killed during the Battle of Passchendaele in 1917. Also, he was a puppy lover.

Mama Said Knock You Out

In 2012, JT showed off his athletic skills (and I guess his upper body as well) in a charity boxing match. He had difficulty finding an opponent until Conservative Senator Patrick Brazeau – that dude on the right – stepped up to the challenge. JT won in the third round and it was considered a major upset. Guess intimidation didn’t work on Justin.

Just Like A Tattoo, I’ll Always Have You

Speaking of shirts off, JT is believed to be the only global leader in modern times to have a tattoo. And his is obviously not a small white ink infinity sign on his pinky finger. No, JT has a huge tatt on his upper left arm, featuring the Earth inside a raven from the Haida tribe, the indigenous ethnic group the Trudeau family are honorary members of.

QT First Family

JT is married to Canadian TV host Sophie Gregoire, and together they have three kids,  Xavier James, 8, Ella-Grace Margaret, 6,  and Hadrien, 1. Why is the entire Trudeau family in their backyard swimming pool, you ask? Who knows? Who Cares! They’re adorable!

Prime Minister Goals

*fist bump*

 

Autumn Memes Make Me Feel Fine: Hotline Bling

We started a new series a few months ago titled “Summer Memes Make Me Feel Fine”, featuring the best user submissions from the most popular memes of the summer. But, as we know, memes just don’t go away. Which is why I’m continuing the trend into fall with a meme for music and Canadian teen drama fans alike.

Drake recently released the music video to his song Hotline Bling, and as seen above, it’s a very low concept vid. It features some dancers and Drake dancing around in a white box. But it’s the dancing that caught the eye of the Internet, and within hours of it going live online, folks were already creating GIFs and Vines and mashups. I love this place.

But JIC you were wondering – Drake knew this meme frenzy was a possibility as soon as they were making the video. His choreographer Tanisha Scott recently told Complex magazine, “We were looking at playbacks, and he was like, ‘This is totally going to be a meme.'” Drake is smarter than all y’all. Look at how much we’re talking about this video that easily could have gone under the radar!

So with Drake’s approval, here are just some of the best Hotline Bling memes on the interwebs right now, proving the Internet never has any chill.

Ace

That backhand tho.

#DrakeAlwaysOnBeat

https://twitter.com/DRAKEDANClNG/status/656318344065327104

#BeyonceAlwaysOnBeat will never be, well, beat, but this comes in a close second. Let Drake get his life from Bieber, okay?

Fab-U-Lous

Speaking of always being on beat… High School Musical remake with Drake as Troy Bolton, pls.

I Salsa Your Face

The song itself has some Latin flair in it, so it’s only natural to mashup it up with salsa music. Sign this guy up for Dancing with the Stars.

The Aubrey Show

The characters in this series are going to provide a lot of good drama on screen.

Star Wars

Drizzy looks like he’s in pain while handling that light saber.

Napoleon Dynamite

This is really just a testament to how iconic this seemingly dumb but truly hilarious movie was. It’s been over a decade since Napoleon Dynamite came out and it’s still being incorporated in memes for 2015. What a time to be alive.

Gotta Catch ‘Em All

I am truly mesmerized by this. How do people make these? And how is Drake launching the pokeballs so fast??

Boys Becoming Men, Men Becoming Wolves

It’s really Drake’s little pelvic thrusts that do it. Which has absolutely nothing to do with werewolf bar mitzvahs.

It’s A Little Bit Unusual

https://twitter.com/DonteAfff/status/656301224849895425

This was a no brainer. If there’s dancing involved, and the Internet, then any meme is bound to have Alfonso Ribeiro swinging his arms around wearing an argyle sweater vest.

Open Late

THIS IS MAYBE MY FAVORITE ONE. I’M CRYING.

Who’s Dancing?

Honestly, Elaine’s dancing isn’t toooo far off from Drake’s.

Bling Long and Prosper

Spock is NOT impressed.

Feel The Bern

God bless Ellen DeGeneres. And God bless America.

 

Word Art & Wallpaper: Exploring 1996 Campaign Websites

We’re about one year away from electing the next President of the United States – I know. It feels like it’s already been going on forever. With the debates and daily late night TV jokes and everything that is going on with Trump, it seems like we’ve been trying to narrow down the candidates from 100 to 2, but we’re still in the thick of it and have a long way to go.

If you’re still undecided about who to throw your support behind, following them on social media or looking up their interviews is a way to go, but tooling around the candidates’ websites is always a safe bet. For the most part, these sites are sleek and user friendly, easy when you want to look up issues important to the politicians.

Flashback to the mid-1990s, when America was deciding between a Clinton/Gore ticket and Dole/Kemp presidency in 1996. The Internet was barely a thing then, so subsequently, so were websites. Legit this was the year before I got my first email address on AOL, so one could only imagine the level of high technology on these sites. Actually, you don’t have to imagine. These sites are still active, and I’m bringing you the best of each Dem and Republican website from 20 years ago. Hop in my time machine *time machine noises* and hit play on your Spice Girls CD because we goin’ way way back.

The Homepage

Clinton/Gore

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You guys need to go to these websites (click on the image above and below for respective sites) because I can’t accurately show the animated images of the flashing modem on Willy C’s homepage. He has a lot of information available on his site, so the flashing modem is just the beginning. Thanks, Al Gore.

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Seriously, the prehistoric GIFs on here are outstanding. The Dole/Kemp website doesn’t have much information available, and that’s partly because we’re on the site 20 years after they lost the election, but partly because they just didn’t have as much on the site as their opponents. I also appreciate that they put “http:// http://www.dolekemp96. org” on the homepage, just in case you forgot what site you were on.

About The Candidates

Clinton/Gore

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REMEMBER WORD ART??? THEY ACTUALLY UTILIZED IT FOR A PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN WEBSITE.

Dole/Kemp

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You can’t even click on Jack Kemp’s page, so if you wanted to know more about him, S.O.L. Or like, go to Wikipedia or something.

The Issues

Clinton/Gore

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The 3D shadow was up another 40% on the immigration page, which obviously indicates he means business. The list of Clinton/Gore’s issues are easy to navigate and not too comprehensive, yet to the point.

Dole/Kemp

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Meanwhile, Bob Dole’s issue pages state his own vision, but then the reason why Bill Clinton is wrong.

Commercials

Clinton/Gore

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One of my favorite things about these sites, especially the Clinton/Gore camp, have specific instructions for early Internet users to use the multimedia on the site. Stuff like explaining how to save campaign posters or view videos. *right click save*

Dole/Kemp

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These commercials were not available to download anymore, but these summaries are sufficient enough. “Bob Dole is a plain-spoken man” (someone we want as Pres…?) . Also he talks about how his grandmother cleaned his mouth out with a bar of soap, so…

Wallpaper

Clinton/Gore

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Y’all, why don’t we use wallpaper anymore??? The idea of going to your favorite celeb or artist’s site and downloading one of the pre-made images is an art we don’t use in 2015! Let’s bring back wallpaper!

Dole/Kemp

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Guys, what’s a .pict??

Site Highlight

Clinton/Gore
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I’m gonna need everyone to read this entire email and enjoy the photo of Bill at his latptop in full.

Dole/Kemp
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TBH, this cookie reciepe doesn’t sound any more exciting than the Keebler Pecan Sandies.

 

(Un)sexy Halloween Costumes That Need To Stop

Every Halloween since 2004, I always imagine this scene in my head when judging other people’s costumes:

So listen, ultimately, it doesn’t matter what I think about your revealing costume, ladies. You do you. But also, like, respect yourself. Respect others. And by respect others, I mean don’t be dumb and wear a barely there costume even if you insult a group of people in the process. I don’t actually know if this trend came to the forefront in recent years or what, but when did women start wearing less and less and less for Halloween instead of costumes like Kady Herron’s? I don’t get the appeal of these “sexy” versions of “unsexy” costumes, so, men, is it primarily just to get into women’s pants/skirts? Because, ugh. Come on. There are plenty of outfits ladies can wear that doesn’t make them just objects of sexual desire, and still get the point across of what they are. Here are just some of the costumes I’ve come across that are extremely questionable and completely unnecessary to be “sexed” up.

“Sexy” Donald Trump

I feel like for a lot of these will just be me going, “WHY. WHY?” So, WHY. WHY? Also that wig is 10 million times better than Trump’s hair ever will be.

“Sexy” Cecil the Lion

It’s also worth noting that most of these costumes are from this trash website Yandy.com, so at least they have a demographic, I guess. Re: this particular costume, it’s obviously a controversial news item (and maybe not as timely?), but among the many problems with this is that technically TECHNICALLY Cecil has passed away, therefore rendering this costume invalid. Although I guess people dress up like dead people all the time, so nvm. It’s still poor form.

“Sexy” Pizza Rat

The only pro to this is the pockets that can probably fit a perfect piece of pizza for you to nibble on later, or drop on stairs in a NYC subway station.

“Sexy” Firewoman

It’s just not practical to have a crop top shirt and shorts in a fire. Also, unbutton shorts at that.

“Sexy” Referee

Because OF COURSE this referee’s jersey number is 69.

“Sexy” Golfer

Like the firewoman before her, golfing in a crop top is not conducive to getting birdies.

“Sexy” Soldier

And wearing a bikini top with bullets attached to it will be problematic after all of them are used.

“Sexy” Nun

This should be self-explanatory, but all I want to yell is, “I SAW GOODY SISTER CATHERINE WITH THE DEVIL!”

“Sexy” Native American

Not only is this not sexy, but it’s obviously offensive to an entire culture too. This is also a PSA encouraging everyone who’s thinking of dressing up that stereotyping any race is not a good idea. It’s never a good idea.

“Sexy” Mr. Peanut

Ok, one last WHY. WHY? I wasn’t aware Mr. Peanut needed to be “sexy” at all!

::endfeministrant::

 

Goosebumps Books That Give You Anything But

I’m not particularly one for being scared. I don’t make it a habit of watching horror films and you won’t see me participating in one of those haunted mazes. When I was younger, I thought going on haunted hayrides and watching “scary movies” were fun, but my coping mechanism was to laugh off everything. HAHA THAT CREEPY STRANGER IN A MASK IS FOLLOWING US WITH A CHAINSAW THAT’S HILARIOUS AND MY KIND OF COMEDY. False. This is the exact opposite of what I wanted and needed in my life.

As a result, I pretended to watch every episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark? (I’ve seen a handful, because some of them are actually frightening) and also bought Goosebumps books from the Scholastic paper “catalog” but only really read one or two of them. Many say there are a number of R.L. Stine classics that really are spooky, but let’s leave it to them to critique. I’m here to echo my younger self’s sentiments and cope with the scariness that is Goosebumps by poking fun of the books themselves. The contents of the novels may have been horrific, but some of these titles are laughable more than anything else.

Why I’m Afraid of Bees

In my head, scary books or movies have titles that are intriguing to the consumer, that make you want to know more, but is inherently frightening. Like The Blair Witch Project or I Know What You Did Last Summer or The Evil Dead. Why I’m Afraid of Bees just sounds like a three-page paper a 9 year old wrote in science class about his summer in the Vineyard.

Go Eat Worms!

DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!!!!!!

My Hairiest Adventure

A cautionary tale about puberty, probably.

Say Cheese and Die – Again!

… Die… AGAIN, THO?

Beware of the Purple Peanut Butter

Maybe the peanut butter just got too mixed with the jelly? IDK, just an idea.

A Shocker on Shock Street

Honestly, it’s your own damn fault if you go to “Shock Street” and expect something other than death or a good fright when you go there.

How I Learned to Fly

That same 9 year old wrote a follow-up essay, and it’s part of Batman’s secret origin story.

Bad Hare Day

Puns, amirite?

Calling All Creeps!

Do we, as a society, use the word ‘creeps’ enough? I feel like we don’t. In which case, I’d like to call on everyone to reach out to the creeps. But not like, actual creeps. Just the word. Okay, good talk.

My Best Friend Is Invisible

My best friend is invisible too, so honestly this book does not scare me at all. Also if my invisible BFF was ordering pizza, that’s definitely not a nightmare, but rather a dream.

I Live in Your Basement!

Why is this monster blob so excited to exclaim he’s living in my basement?!

Chicken, Chicken

 

I mean, honestly.

 

Dance Craze Cray

There is nothing that makes you feel more old when a kid references something that you don’t understand. You know, when you think the person had a stroke in saying something to you, but instead, you take note and look it up on Urban Dictionary later only to find out it’s something either extremely sexual or not at all what you thought.

I was watching the BET Hip Hop Awards earlier this week, when a rapper named IHeartMemphis (apparently he’s just going by Memphis now), performed his hit song Hit The Quan which comes complete with a funky dance. Legit the only other time I had heard of it was when Hayes Grier (look him up, grandma) mentioned it on Dancing With The Stars (haters to the left) and I was like… is that English? Not only is it English, but it’s becoming the new hit that will be overplayed in approx 4 weeks and soon we’ll be seeing people who shouldn’t be doing the Quan doing it anyways.

But of course, this isn’t the first time a novelty dance has swept the nation/world. It’s become a pop culture milestone once a song reaches a certain level of popularity, and here are just some of the most memorable ones throughout the years.

Whip/Nae Nae

If you’re just catching on to the Whip/Nae Nae now, just be aware it will be over in a few weeks before the Quan takes over. The Whip/Nae Nae, to Silento’s Watch Me, actually is one of the few songs on this list that includes other famous dance moves from novelty songs, such as the superman, stanky leg, and bop. That doesn’t make it any less stupid.

Macarena

The year is 1996. A song called Macarena by Los Del Rio hits the radio and a young Traci in Western New York, who thinks it’s cool to be able to buy cassette tapes and CDs, purchases the cassette single of Macarena to… practice the dance? The Macarena became a hit in my house and all over the world, and a number one track on multiple music charts. It was played at school dances, weddings, sports arenas, basically anywhere you could listen to music. Not knowing the moves was considered sacrilege, like a betrayal to the human race. But since it was in Spanish, most people never really knew what the song was really about, and it’s kind of disturbing.

It was inspired by a flamenco teacher, and in the song they sing, “Dale a tu cuerpo alegría, Ma’dalena, que tu cuerpo e’ pa’ darle alegría y cosa’ buena'” (“Give your body some joy, Magdalene, ’cause your body is for giving joy and good things too”). In Andalusian culture, naming a woman “Magdalena” is associating her with Mary Magdalene and her sordid (prostitute) past, suggesting the woman is sassy or sensuous.

Teach Me How To Dougie

Cali Swag District actually wants to teach you how to dougie. So much so that they put the instructions into the lyrics of the song. 1) You need a “beat that’s super bumping”. 2) Back it up and dump it. 3) Put your arms out from and lean side to side 4) They gon’ be on you when they see you hit that dougie right. 5) All the bitches will love you.

Tootsee Roll

This song is my youth. MY YOUTH, I SAY! I was 9 years old when the 69 Boyz released this jam (hahahaha everything about that) and I remember it being a popular song with me and my friends and we’d constantly reference it. I certainly wasn’t aware of what I was singing and dancing along to, all I knew was that I liked it, and damnit, I still like it. This music video tho.

Superman

As previously mentioned, the Whip/Nae Nae mentions the Superman aka Crank That (Soulja Boy) by Soulja Boy, which for some reason I can’t believe was released 8 years ago. Anyways, Soulja Boy was just 17 when the song reached number one and became an international hit. So why has it taken me so long to find out “Crank That” is also a euphemism for masturbation???? This, from Genius.com, so obviously accurate.

Gangnam Style

Who knew that a K-Pop star could take the world by storm with a song that’s not in English and a music video that barely makes any sense? With over 2.43 billion views on YouTube, this is the most watched vid on the site, but really, my favorite Gangnam Style vid has to go to SNL’s sketch featuring Bobby Moynihan as Psy and Hader as the weird dude in the elevator. Comedy gold.

Harlem Shake

So we know the actual Harlem Shake dance is actually nothing like these “meme” that went viral a few years ago, but I was still confused when this first came out. I was expecting this but instead got a bunch of idiots making their own version of the madness that is the Harlem Shake. But this one, featuring the cast of Happy Endings (RIP) is one of the best.

 

Pop Culture Reunions That Need To Happen

The reunion issue of Entertainment Weekly came out last week, and we got to see what the casts of Bring It On, Felicity, Family Ties and more are up to now. This issue is one of my favorite annual issues from EW, especially when they cover shows or movies I’m particularly interested like Gilmore Girls or Clueless or The West Wing (have you SEEN the vid of Bradley & Janel talking about present-day Josh & Donna?!). There are of course millions of things to choose from when it comes to narrowing it down to a few for each issue, but I too have hopes and wishes for future get togethers by some of my (used-to-be) favorite stars. Here are just some of them.

Good Morning, Miss Bliss

Before Zack and Slater in California, there was Zack and Mikey in Indiana. The latter lasted approx one season, but thanks to the magic of syndication, the 14 episodes were rolled into repeats of Saved by the Bell. This explains why as a kid you saw two middle schoolers – Mikey and Nicki – suddenly turn into high school Slater and Jessie. Call it The Tori Complex, if you will. While we know Zack, Lisa and Screech and even Mr. Belding went on to find fame with SBTB, the actors who played Mikey and Nicki, Max Battimo and Heather Hopper, didn’t quite reach that level. Even Miss Bliss’ teachers Miss Tina Paladrino and maintenance supervisor Mylo Williams had few roles here and there. I think the reunion, more than anything, would be to ask the question – what went wrong with this show?

Notting Hill

When we were growing up in the 90s, Julia Roberts was (and arguably still is) the Queen of Romantic Comedies. After seeing My Best Friend’s Wedding for the first time, I became obsessed both with her and the movie, and when Notting Hill came along, that became my favorite. Like, I have it on VHS currently in my room and have seen it way too many times to remember. Pairing Julia with the King of Romantic Comedies, Hugh Grant, was a no-brainer and they had great chemistry. It also stars a young Mischa Barton, Alec Baldwin AND his 30 Rock frail-boned co-star Emily Mortimer, and the dude from The Wire. But it’s also the first introduction I had to Hugh Bonneville aka Lord Grantham on Downton Abbey, as Bernie, Hugh/Will’s friend. He has a very understated comedic charm to him we don’t get to see as much on Downton.

Ally McBeal

Most of the Ally McBeal cast reunited at the TV Land Awards earlier this year, but I want a full get together with Robert Downey Jr., Jane Krakowski, Lucy Liu, Taye Diggs and Portia De Rossi, otherwise it would be for naught. Also, didn’t know until right now that Renee Elise Goldberry of Hamilton fame played one of Vonda Shepard’s backup singers in the bar throughout the entire series. BRAND NEW INFORMATION. She should be invited to the reunion too.

Ed

Ed, the show about a big town lawyer who moves back to his small hometown and becomes the owner of a bowling alley. This show ran for four seasons and through the entirety of my high school career. I loved this show, but like most programs I watched back in the day, I wasn’t necessarily the target demographic. None the less, the show was a lovely dramedy with sort of a Gilmore Girls vibe. It also produced stars like Modern Family’s Julie Bowen, Michael Ian Black, and a young Justin Long and Ginnifer Goodwin (again, learning so much. I forgot she was in Ed, but very clearly remembered their scenes together in classic He’s Just Not That Into You). Most of these actors have gone on to do great things, but like, where’s Lesley Boone/Molly? Jana Marie Hupp/Nancy (SHE WAS MINDY IN THE ONE WITH BARRY AND MINDY’S WEDDING #COPACABANA).

Rent

I was introduced to Rent when I was approx 13 years old, around the time Rent first hit Broadway. I’d listen to the OBC soundtrack on repeat, and for sentimental reasons, is still one of my favorite musicals. Despite getting together for the polarizing movie and the 10th anniversary show, I will always be available for this OG cast to get together once more. Especially Taye and Idina.

Newsies

Speaking of musicals, Newsies was a childhood staple for many kids my age, and starred a young Christian Bale before he became Batman. If I could just get a current group picture of everyone in this cast in the exact same pose, crutch and all, that would be fantastic.

Dirty Sexy Money

It’s like a given we would all like a reunion of Six Feet Under, so that aside, he’s another addicting show Peter Krause was a part of. I binged this a few years ago when it was still on Netflix Instant, and I don’t even remember why. Maybe it was Peter I was intrigued by. Then again it was also Donald Sutherland, a girl from Passions, Lucy Liu (again) and William Baldwin. This would be a fun reunion, specifically because it was cancelled after just two seasons with a total of 23 episodes. What happened to this Darling family??

Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip

Is Studio 60 polarizing, too? Probably. Did I watch it because I appreciate Matthew Perry? Of course. Did I expect to like it so much that I bought the DVDs? Absolutely not. Studio 60 had some problems with it, of course, but all the cast members were extremely talented and made the show watchable. Also, Columbus Short, aka Harrison from Scandal was on it, along with Dawn from the British The Office, and it’s weird seeing them not as the characters you most associate them with, despite the fact Scandal came after this show. Anyways.

Laguna Beach

Molly & I didn’t even go to our own high school reunion, so I can’t say I entirely expect the cast of Laguna Beach to take part in a reunion. However, it would be itneresting to see what’s changed dynamics wise. Is Kristin still mad at ‘Stephennnnn’? Does Stephen pine for LC at all? What happened to Christina’s Broadway dreams? Is Trey still the best human on the show (besides LC)?

That Thing You Do

In addition to renting this movie on VHS, for some reason, That Thing You Do! was constantly, or what seemed to be, on repeat on VH1. It wasn’t a blockbuster in the box office, but it wasn’t a flop either. What it does have is a strong, passionate fan base who will be able to sing the titular track for you at a moment’s notice. They’ll know the different between The Wonders and The Oneders, and know how to pronounce the latter. They’ll also want to get the band back together one more time.

2Ge+her

2ge+her

And one final segue – SPEAKING OF BANDS GETTING BACK TOGETHER – I’ve spoken about this before, but as a young lass, I was a teenybopper to the max. BSB was my jam, and that love of boy bands extended to pretty much everyone (except ‘N Sync, duh), including the fake boy band put together on MTV to mock the genre. That ultimately backfired since they had a ‘hit’ song with U+Me = Us (Calculus) and their follow-up hit, The Hardest Part of Breaking Up (Is Getting Back Your Stuff). Both their albums made it into the Billboard top 40, including their sophomore record, 2Ge+her Again, which hit 11. While it wouldn’t be the same without the late Michael Cuccione as part of the reunion, it would be great to see them 2GE+HER AGAIN.

 

How Did I Miss That? Gilmore Girls Pilot Edition

Monday, October 5th marked the 15th anniversary of Gilmore Girls making its debut on the now defunct WB network. It was the beginning of a glorious six seven-season run of what is now considered one of the best TV series in history. We’ve stated our love for GG before – we’ve had a Gilmore Girls theme week leading up to the epic reunion we witnessed IRL at the ATX TV Festival in June WE EVEN MET #LUKEDANESDREAMMAN AND I’M JUST SAYING THAT BECAUSE  I STILL DON’T BELIEVE THAT HAPPENED. Needless to say, we’re fans.

GG has been part of my routine ever since I discovered it, and most of the time, if I watch a repeat, watching = doing other stuff while it’s in the background to make me feel comfortable and not alone. One of the reasons why I love the show so much is that there will be times, no matter how many times I’ve seen an ep, in which I’ll catch a joke or background thing or line I’ve never noticed before. It’s a GG mystery that I hope is never solved.

In the spirit of it being the 15th anniversary, I thought I’d revisit the pilot, and take note of all the things I either never noticed or realized before. I’d also like to mention that there is an unaired pilot floating around the Internet somewhere, and I could only find a script for it. However, I did get a hold of a janky clip which shows the original Dean, played by a rando Canadian actor (they shot the pilot in the greater Toronto area). It’s as weird as you think it is. Anyways, on with the show!

VIP Extra

Photo Oct 07, 1 41 33 AM

In the first scene in Luke’s, Rory comes in to meet Lorelai and as she comes in the door, a man passes by her as he’s exiting the diner. That guy is Daniel Palladino, executive producer, writer, sometimes director and full-time husband to GG creator Amy Sherman-Palladino.

Gilmore Speed in Slo-Mo

The pilot was obviously written by the one and only ASP, so although the dialogue itself is as consistent as it is throughout the her tenure on the show, it somehow feels a bit less fast-paced than we’re used to seeing in later seasons, and even later on in season one (sidenote: if that clip doesn’t make you tear up you’re not a true Gilly).

Is Lisa Frank Billing the Independence Inn?

Photo Oct 06, 9 30 16 PM

I’m assuming the papers Lorelai is going through here are random invoices and the ilk for the inn, so why is one of them rainbow colored and have stickers on it?

Short Skirt Long Jacket

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Look, I’m not a prude or anything, but does this skirt seem just a little toooo short for the manager of an inn? It’s quite the juxtaposition to Rory’s moo moo.

Teens Only

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I wasn’t aware hayrides were exclusively for teens? Or is this just a Stars Hollow thing? Taylor has some strict rules. Actually, Taylor’s not even in this episode, so maybe he doesn’t even exist yet.

Is The Whole Town Out?

Photo Oct 07, 1 51 39 AM (1)

There are way too many extras in this scene, and most of them are completely unnecessary. Stars Hollow has a population of like 1,000-2,000. The town centre is one block. Is this crossing guard wasting his time here?

Crazy Carrie Pulls An Anna Nardini

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I think this is the one that gets me the most that I never noticed this, but Rory’s English teacher at Stars Hollow High is played by the same actress who appears as Crazy Carrie (Liz’s friend who’s too into Luke) in seasons four and five!

Mrs. Kim Rebrands

Photo Oct 07, 1 57 59 AM

We all know Mrs. Kim’s store is called Kim’s Antiques, as the above establishing shot tells us. But then a second later when the girls are going into the house, it’s named something completely different. The Glass Chimney? What does that even mean? And the sign’s also facing the wrong way? Also, Lane calls Mrs. Kim Mom and not Mama, which is somehow off-putting for me.

What Is Chilton, Anyways?

Chilton

V old pic of me and my friend recreating this scene from the lorelai’s first day at chilton at greystone manor

When Lor and Sookie tell Rory she’s made it into Chilton, Sook excitedly tells Rory, “I’ll make cookies, Protestants love oatmeal”… is Chilton a Protestant school? Wasn’t aware it had religious affiliations at all.

Pre-Paul Anka

Photo Oct 07, 2 00 08 AM

WHO DOES THIS DOG BELONG TO

Lor’s Got A Skirt Problem

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“Let me hem it.” “A little. Only a little.” Is one of Lorelai’s establishing characteristics that she really likes short skirts? And Rory doesn’t like short skirts? I don’t get it. Rory tries on her uniform for Chilton and it’s at a really weird length. Not to the ankle but not above the knee. As someone who went to Catholic school for most of my life, uniform skirts were supposed to be just below the knee, but if you were cool, you rolled your skirt up to go above. None of whatever Rory’s wearing rn.

The Pre-Rennovated Gilmore Residence

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Just like Luke’s and Lorelai’s house, the Emily & Richard Gilmore mansion is much different than it is in later seasons. Most notably, behind the couch Lor and Rory sit on is a wall, not an open space with stairs leading to the second floor that we’re used to. Also, Emily notes that Chilton is five minutes away from their house

Hot Dogs

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She’s one step away from a Hang In There poster.

He’s Got Jokes

INT. HIGH SCHOOL – DAY

RORY: You know you should check with Miss Patty. She teaches dance. She was actually on Broadway once.

DEAN
I don’t really dance much. {😂😂😂}

RORY: No. She just kind of knows everything that’s happening in town. She’ll know if someone’s looking.

DEAN
Oh. Great. Thanks.

Salad & Coffee Diet

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Mark this moment as one, if not the only, time you see the Gilmore girls eating salad. And what’s also disturbing is that Rory is washing it all down with orange juice?

What Year Does Rory Think It Is?

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I was in 8th grade when this first aired, so I was aware of fashion trends – but I don’t remember the combat boot/thick sock/tights combo Rory is sporting. Isn’t this more of a 1994 look? And it really bothers me that she put her shoes on her bed to take them off. It’s Connecticut and you walk everywhere, those things have to be so dirty!

My World Crumbles When You Are Not Near

In the beginning of the episode, Rory accuses Lor of stealing her Macy Gray CD (which is already questionable, because they don’t seem like the type to enjoy Macy Gray, and are more prone to make fun of her, but whatever). After Rory and Lor get into a semi-fight about Rory not wanting to go to Chilton after meeting Dean for the first time, Rory has a fit and presses play on her CD player and I Try by Macy Gray comes on. Then it cuts to Lor going into the living room and pressing play on her boom box and I Try starts yet again. Obviously it’s not the radio, but they only have one copy of this CD, no? Unless Lor burned it? Pretty sure she didn’t know how to do that.

How tall are you? Why? You wanna dance?

Rory is 5’7″? She’s tall. Still not as tall as Dean. Or her grandfather.

Another Maid Bites The Dust

The maid sees Lor angrily washing the dishes in the kitchen but doesn’t tell her to stop. I get why Emily would fire her.

Take A Break*

Photo Oct 07, 2 22 02 AM

Why is Richard sleeping at the dinner table? He starts off the Friday Night Dinner reading the newspaper during cocktail hour, and now he’s snoozing at the actual dinner table. They make Richard out to be a husband/dad who doesn’t seem to care, but I’m glad they developed him into a strong patriarch of the family. This was just odd seeing him so indifferent.

* This is a Hamilton reference.