Tag Archives: Barack Obama

One Last Time: Obama and Kids

Posted in Miscellany by

Think about this: for a whole generation of children, President Barack Obama is the only president they can remember. They’ve only known a president grounded in goodwill, diplomacy and belief in the possibility of change and progress. As long as these children have been aware of it, their president has been black. Eight years isn’t much to us as adults, but for a child it’s a lifetime. These children have spent a lifetime knowing that it’s possible for a child of any race to grow up to be president – if you can see it, you can be it.

One of the best insights into President Obama’s character comes when he interacts with children. I’d say that’s one of the best ways to get a look at anybody’s character. Not everybody is a “kid person,” but it says a lot when an adult regards a child as a full person. This means listening, regarding their opinions as important and valid, and seeing the humanity in a person who has only been walking this earth for a handful of years. President Obama listens to kids and meets their gaze at their level: this is important. President Obama’s interactions with children also show his sense of fun and spontaneity – he is more interested in playing and having a good time than in appearing stoic or dignified. Most of the others-centered people I have known share this quality. They are fully present with whoever is in the room, child or adult, and are more tuned into that experience than how they are perceived.

All that to say: President Obama is a great guy. We are thrilled that today’s children have grown up with him as their president. Also, he’s adorable with kids. Here are some of our favorite Obama and kids moments:

“A temporary White House staffer, Carlton Philadelphia, brought his family to the Oval Office for a farewell photo with President Obama. Carlton’s son softly told the President he had just gotten a haircut like President Obama, and asked if he could feel the President’s head to see if it felt the same as his.” May 8, 2009

“A temporary White House staffer, Carlton Philadelphia, brought his family to the Oval Office for a farewell photo with President Obama. Carlton’s son softly told the President he had just gotten a haircut like President Obama, and asked if he could feel the President’s head to see if it felt the same as his.” May 8, 2009

This little guy told Barry he had gotten a haircut just like the President, and asked if he could feel his head to see if it felt the same as his. This photo has become one of the most iconic snapshots of Barack’s administration, and is the perfect example of how much of a role model he’s been to kids around the country, and the world.

Students show their excitement at meeting President Barack Obama during his visit to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Charter School in New Orleans, La., Oct. 15, 2009. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama greets students at Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Charter School in New Orleans. October, 2009.

Joy. Just pure joy.

President Barack Obama plays with his niece Savita during the family’s vacation on Martha’s Vineyard, Aug. 25 2009. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama with his niece Savita in Martha’s Vineyard, August, 2009.

I always forget Barack has a half-sister that’s Indonesian, and she’s married to a full Chinese dude, which is why Barack’s niece is the most Asian. #America

Barack filling in as coach for Sasha’s basketball team, February, 2011.

When two of the coaches for your kid’s basketball team have to bail last minute, you ask the other kids’ parents if they can fill in. And one of the volunteers happens to be the President of the United States. Barack and his then personal aide, Reggie Love pull out their coach hats and playbooks and here they are cheering on the girls’ team from the sidelines. Super normal.

President Barack Obama holds up four-month-old Alia Jawando as her father, William Jawando, Deputy Associate Director of Public Engagement, and her mother Michele look on in the Oval Office, March 9, 2011. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama holds up four-month old Alia Jawando, whose father William was the Deputy Associate Director of Public Engagement. March, 2011.

*NANTS INGONYAMA BAGITHI BABA*

President Barack Obama greets children at a day care facility adjacent to daughter Sasha’s school in Bethesda, Md., following her 4th grade closing ceremony, June 9, 2011. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama greets kids at a day care in Bethseda, Maryland. June, 2011.

This was just a stop along Barack’s journey that day, as he had attended Sasha’s 4th grade closing ceremony just next door. But I love the faces of these kinder who have no idea that they’re face to face with the President. Years from now, they’ll look back in awe that they were that close to our of our country’s greatest leaders.

Feb. 1, 2012 “Lawrence Jackson captured this cute photograph of the President holding Arianna Holmes, 3, before taking a departure photo with members of her family in the Oval Office.” (Official White House Photo by Lawrence Jackson)

President Obama holding three-year-old Arianna Holmes in the Oval Office. February, 2012

As Barack looks at Abraham Lincoln before him, I look at little Arianna thinking, “Same, girl. Same.”

President Barack Obama runs around his desk in the Oval Office with Sarah Froman, daughter of Nancy Goodman and Mike Froman, Deputy National Security Advisor for International Economics, July 9, 2012. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama runs around the Oval with Sarah, daughter of Mike Froman, Deputy National Security Advisor for International Economics. July, 2012.

One of the many things I appreciated about Barack and Michelle is that they brought youth both physically and in their spirits back into the White House. It’s been a hot second since we’ve seen a POTUS running around chasing a tot in the Oval Office.

President Barack Obama signs a photograph as he greets people on the tarmac upon arrival at Louis Armstrong International Airport in New Orleans, La., July 25, 2012. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama signs a photograph for a young man at the New Orleans, airport. July, 2012.

What a wonderful thing to see yourself in your role model.

The President takes a hit from Spider-Man. October, 2012

Another iconic shot taken by official White House photographer Pete Souza (most of these photos are by him), in which Nicholas Tamarin, 3, slings his web after trick-or-treating in the Eisenhower Executive Office Building with his father, WH aide Nate Tamarin. Yet again, it shows the playfulness and joy President Obama has around kids, which might be why he now has this photo hanging in the West Wing.

December 16, 2012

President Obama poses with the family of Emilie Parker, one of the 20 children killed in Newtown. December, 2012

President Obama has called the day the Newtown shooting occurred the worst day of his presidency, and two days after it happened, he visited the victims’ families and to give a speech at a prayer vigil. He spent hours speaking with them, and this photo was taken with the siblings and cousins of Emile, who died in the massacre. The President was able to find a moment to smile in the midst of a horrifying tragedy, and it’s all because he has hope for a bright future of these children.

The President with Robby Novak aka Kid President. April, 2013.

Remember when we all met Kid President for the first time and he shared his inspirational words with us?

June 14, 2013 “The President called me over to pose for a photo with a young boy who had fallen asleep during the Father’s Day ice cream social in the State Dining Room of the White House.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

Father’s Day ice cream social. June, 2013

When you at the White House for a once-in-a-lifetime event but you mad tired because your mom made you get up at the buttcrack of dawn to get ready.

April 4, 2014 “Despite the haphazard framing, I love the expressions on the President and one-year-old Lincoln Rose Smith as she learns to walk in the Oval Office. This moment happened when former Deputy Press Secretary Jamie Smith and her family stopped by for a departure greet and photograph with the President.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

Lincoln Rose, daughter of former Deputy Press Secretary Jamie Smith, learns how to walk with the help of President Obama. April, 2014

So much happiness from both of these adorable humans.

President Obama writes an excuse for five-year-old Alanah Poullard, who skipped school to visit the White House. September, 2013

President Obama writes an excuse for five-year-old Alanah Poullard, who skipped school to visit the White House. September, 2013

Alanah skipped Kindergarten for the day to attend an event for Wounded Warriors and their families, and personally asked the President to write her the note. This child is me. I am this child.

President Obama meets with students at an elementary school at MacDill Air Force Base in Tampa, Florida. September, 2014

President Obama meets with students at an elementary school at MacDill Air Force Base in Tampa, Florida. September, 2014

Barry specifically said, “Don’t make rabbit ears” so obviously it was Opposite Day and these kids did it anyways. Please also note the girl to his right, who is just clutching on to him as if he’s her uncle. That’s the kind of person we want in the White House.

President Barack Obama and a young boy point at each other as the President greets Marine personnel and their families at Marine Corps Base Hawaii on Christmas Day, Dec. 25, 2014. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama greets a young boy at the Marine Corps base Hawaii on Christmas Day, 2014

“Hey, I recognize you from the TV!”

President Barack Obama holds a baby during a U.S. Embassy meet and greet in Kingston, Jamaica, April 8, 2015. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

A baby grabs a hold of President Obama’s face in Kingston, Jamaica. April, 2015.

It’s cute when a baby does it, but if I did this I’d be tackled by Secret Service. Probs worth it.

President Obama gets to the level of baby Ella, daughter of Deputy National Security Advisor Ben Rhodes, June, 2015. [Pete Souza]

President Obama gets to the level of baby Ella, daughter of Deputy National Security Advisor Ben Rhodes, June, 2015.

Who doesn’t love tummy time in the Oval on top of the Presidential seal? Bonus: here’s a pic of Barry calling Ben when baby Ella was born in 2014. I mean. Literal precious moments.

June 17, 2015 “The President carries the twin boys of Katie Beirne Fallon, Director of Legislative Affairs, into the Oval Office just a few months after they were born.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

Double trouble with the twin sons of Katie Beirne Fallon, Director of Legislative Affairs. June, 2015.

Tag yourself I’m the crying mom in the background, despite not knowing these children at all.

July 17, 2015 “The President greets nine-month-old Josephine Gronniger, whose father, Tim Gronniger, brought his family by the Oval Office for a family photo.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama has a mind meld with nine-month-old Josephine Gronniger. July, 2015.

I bet President Obama’s going to be the dad who keeps asking Sasha and Malia to have kids when they’re older so he can have grandbabies.

Sept. 21, 2015 “The President exchanges a wave with Alya Dorelien Bitar, one-year-old daughter of Maher Bitar, the outgoing National Security Council Director for Israeli and Palestinian Affairs, and his wife, Astrid Dorelien, during a family photo in the Oval Office.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

Happy baby Alya Dorelien Bitar, one-year-old daughter of Maher Bitar, the outgoing National Security Council Director for Israeli and Palestinian Affairs, waves hello to the President. September, 2015.

I said hey what’s up hello.

President Obama plays with lucky baby Ella Rhodes in her Halloween costume. October, 2015.

Ella Rhodes, possibly the luckiest baby in the White House?

Dec. 4, 2015 “The President snuggles with his niece Savita Ng after his sister, Maya Soetoro-Ng, and her family dropped by the Oval Office.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

Hey remember Barack’s niece Savita from earlier? Yeah this is her. December, 2015

Like Sasha and Malia, Savita also grew up a lot during the course of her uncle’s tenure in the White House. And yet again, he reminds us that his family is American in the truest sense of the word.

Dec. 4, 2015 “The President acquiesced to a selfie with 11-year-old Jacob Haynes and four-year-old James Haynes after taking a family photograph with departing White House staffer Heather Foster.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

Jacob Haynes, 11, snaps a selfie with the President as he holds Jacob’s four-year-old brother. December, 2015

But first – let me take a selfie (is that reference dated).

President Obama meets with Prince William and Princess Kate, and is introduced to Prince George, April 2016. [Pete Souza]

President Obama meets with Prince William and Princess Kate, and is introduced to Prince George. April 2016.

Prince George is too cool to suit up for Barry and decided to wear his daytime loungewear instead (I think he was actually about to take a nap).

April 14, 2016 “The President is always asking staff to bring their babies and young kids by for a visit. Here, during a break between meetings one afternoon, the President crawled around in the Oval Office with Communications Director Jen Psaki’s daughter Vivi.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

The President spends a break between meetings with Communications Director Jen Psaki’s daughter Vivi. April, 2016.

Just think about all the children who have crawled around the Oval with the President and how they’ve been blessed with his presence.

President Obama embraces eight-year-old Amariyanna Copeny, who wrote him a letter asking him to visit her hometown of Flint, Michigan as they battle the devastating water crisis and what she's doing to help. For a fun comparison, this is Amariyanna (also Little Miss Flint) meeting President-Elect T*ump.

President Obama embraces eight-year-old Amariyanna Copeny. May 2016.

Amariyanna wrote President Obama a letter asking him to visit her hometown of Flint, Michigan as they battle the devastating water crisis and what she’s doing to help. For a fun comparison, this is Amariyanna (also Little Miss Flint) meeting President-Elect T*ump.

Feb. 18, 2016 “I had my eye on this youngster while President Barack Obama spoke during a reception at the White House celebrating African American History Month. When the President starting greeting audience members along the rope line, I bent down in front of the young man and captured this moment of the President touching his face before he too bent down to greet him. Afterwards, I tracked down his name — Clark Reynolds — and had the President sign a copy for him.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama says hello to a young Clark Reynolds during an event for African-American History Month. February, 2016

Again, President Obama has of course been a role model to all children who have only known him to be the POTUS, but he’s especially been an iconic figure for many black children and teens who may not feel like they have a place in the American society. To see someone of such power that they can see a little of him in themselves is a moving and magical thing. *After this picture was taken by WH photog Pete Souza, he tracked down Clark’s name and had the President sign a copy for the tot to have.

June 22, 2016 “The great thing about children is you just don’t know what they will do in the presence of the President. So when David Axelrod stopped by the Oval Office with one of his sons’ family, Axe’s granddaughter, Maelin, crawled onto the Vice President’s seat while the President continued his conversation with the adults. Then at one point, Maelin glanced over just as the President was looking back at her.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

David Axelrod’s granddaughter casually crashes one of President Obama’s meetings. June, 2016

Isn’t it weird to think that for the kids whose parents work in the White House that it’s totally the norm they could run into the President of the United States? This pic was taken when former Obama campaign strategist Axelrod stopped by to speak with Barack, and in a pause from the conversation with the adults, he looked over to see little Maelin sitting in VP Joe Biden’s chair. Casually eating an apple because, Michelle.

Oct. 31, 2016 “The President was about to welcome local children for Halloween trick-or-treating when he ran into Superman Walker Earnest, son of Press Secretary Josh Earnest, in the Ground Floor Corridor of the White House. ‘Flex those muscles,’ he said to Walker.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

The President meets another superhero on Halloween. October, 2016

One of the best events to look at videos from is the annual Halloween parade, and last year, the President ran into Superman aka Walker Earnest, son ofPress Secretary Josh Earnest,. What happened is the most adorable thing that will leave your ovaries in pain. Watch here.

Nov. 8, 2016 “The President had just walked in from the dining room and sitting on the floor in the Oval Office was Evelyn ‘Evie’ Cushman, daughter of Chase Cushman, Director of Scheduling and Advance. He immediately dropped down to his hands and knees and began tossing a ball back and forth with her.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

President Obama spends part of Election Day with Evelyn ‘Evie’ Cushman, daughter of Chase Cushman, Director of Scheduling and Advance. November, 2016

Barack spends more time on the floor of the Oval with kids than the President-Elect has lawsuit against him. And that’s a lot. If I had the option to play around on the floor with a tot on Election Day, I would be doing this instead of work too.

Nov. 10, 2016 “A good respite from the day after the election was the visit of Alex Myteberi. The six-year-old boy from New York had written a letter to President Obama after seeing a heart-breaking photograph of Syrian refugee Omran Daqneesh sitting silently in an ambulance, covered in blood and dust, after an air strike on Aleppo. In his letter, Alex wrote to the President: ‘Can you please go get him and bring him to my home. We’ll be waiting for you guys with flags, flowers, and balloons. We will give him a family and he will be our brother. The President was so touched by the letter that he read excerpts from it at the United Nations in September. Alex and his family were invited to the Oval Office so the President could tell him in person how much the letter had meant to him.” (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

Six-year-old Alex Myteberi meets with the President after writing a letter asking him to help a young Syrian refugee. November, 2016.

You’ve seen that heartbreaking photo of a young Syrian refugee covered in blood and dust after an air strike in Aleppo. So did Alex. He decided to write to President Obama asking him to help the refugee and bring him to his home in Scarsdale, New York so he could be their new brother. The President read the letter, invited Alex and his family to the White House and even read excerpts from the letter in a speech at the UN. If you’re in the mood for crying (or even if you’re not) watch Alex’s story here.

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One Last Time: Obama Week

Posted in Miscellany by
We’re in the final stretch of President Barack Obama’s presidency, and since we’ve been transparent about our feelings about the election and the future of our country over the past year or so, why stop there? We’re dedicating all next week – the days leading up to the President’s final day in office – to a leader we’ve admired, respected, and genuinely loved over the past eight years. Join us as we take a look back at some of our favorite moments between him and the First Lady, VP Joe Biden, and everyday Americans. Needless to say, we’ll miss you Barry. #ThanksObama

If I say goodbye, the nation learns to move on
It outlives me when I’m gone
Like the scripture says:
“Everyone shall sit under their own vine and fig tree
And no one shall make them afraid.”
They’ll be safe in the nation we’ve made
I wanna sit under my own vine and fig tree
A moment alone in the shade
At home in this nation we’ve made
One last time

Autumn Memes Make Me Feel Fine: The Jobama Bromance

Posted in Miscellany by

It’s been a week since the World Turned Upside Down™, and if you’re still kind of in a funk, I’m guessing you need as much levity as possible. Thankfully, the Internet never lets us down. I mean it does sometimes, but in cases like this, it doesn’t.

We’re continuing our series of seasonal memes with a Last Term Obama special. Most of us have been living in a nightmare since last Tuesday night, and no one knows it better than Barack Obama himself – the man who has to turn the keys over to a guy who is putting the White back in White House, if you know what I mean. When Barry gave his first speech after the results came him, he stood in the rose garden with his Right Hand Man™ by his side. At one point, good ol’ Joe did the sign of the cross, because that’s what you do when T**mp becomes leader of the free world. Meme makers took note and realized there are a lot more cute moments between Barack and Joe, and decided to take it next level by making them into a meme, specifically aimed at Joe’s disdain towards the president elect.

Here are some of our favorites, and hopefully it can put a smile on your face for a little while! #JobamaForever

https://twitter.com/Thomas_A_Moore/status/797584838983303168?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

https://twitter.com/jonnysun/status/797198272079298568?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

 

https://twitter.com/deanfortythree/status/797124765299318784?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

https://twitter.com/roostermustache/status/796907610138148864?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

https://twitter.com/Sammart123/status/797542176309669888?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

https://twitter.com/fIawlesssivan/status/796898931347099648?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

https://twitter.com/jbillinson/status/797117307482963968?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

https://twitter.com/pieceofjay/status/797187300723752960?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

 

https://twitter.com/jbillinson/status/797638259245514752

BONUS:

http://capdorable.tumblr.com/post/153168890411

 

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Watch the Brangelina Throne

Posted in Entertainment by

Our long national nightmare is over Love is Dead! Ok, on the real, how are we all feeling about the Brangelina split a week later? Did we see this coming? Or were we completely blindsided? Are you choosing a team? Do you even care? I’m personally on the side of, *meh*. Is it because Friends is one of my all time TV shows and I spent some of my formative years seeing Brad and Jennifer as the Hollywood ‘IT’ couple then he made a movie with the sexiest woman alive and did an oddly cozy faux family magazine shoot pre-Jen divorce? Perhaps. But I know for a lot of people, Brangelina was one of the last A-list couples still left standing. So who can replace them? If you fall in the latter category, the answer is ‘no one’, but if you’re willing to open your heart and let in another couple to be the next Brangelina, I’ve got a few suggestions.

Chrissy Teigen + John Legend

http://instacelebs.tumblr.com/post/146242408400

If you don’t follow these two on social media, do so now. It’s one thing when they take the red carpet (looking smokin’ hot all the time), but it nudges them up a bunch of notches when you see them interact on social media, as seen in the above Twitter exchange. Plus they’ll post cute and not annoying PDA pix and vids, and share posts of their adorable baby daughter Luna. They’re hilarious, smart, and socially active – in the way they speak out about social issues and politics, not necessarily social media. And again, they’re nice to look at, which doesn’t hurt.

Ellen DeGeneres + Portia DeRossi

http://degeneresellen.tumblr.com/post/94988692006/ellen-portia-wedding-anniversaries-august

I feel like every two and a half months, there are rumors these two are breaking up. I never believe the gossip – BECAUSE THESE TWO ARE NEVER SPLITTING UP. NOT ON MY WATCH. Ellen always speaks the loveliest words about Portia in a way that makes me think I, TOO, am in love with Portia. Also, Portia’s wedding dress continues to be one of my favorite celeb dresses ever.

Emily Blunt + John Krasinski

Preface: John Krasinski is my boo. He has been my boo since The Office, and when he started dating Emily Blunt, I was all, ‘yeah, that makes sense’. They seem so compatible with each other and just laid back and not all about the fame. So I guess if you liked Brangelina for the movie star/untouchable quality, Emily and John may not be your cuppa tea. I like that they’re open about their relationship and family, yet secretive in the sense they’re not pushing it into our faces like Kimye is wont to do. Plus they just seem like good people.

Beyonce + Jay Z

In terms of superstar quality and elusiveness, I think Bey and Jay are the closest thing to Brangelina. They don’t share too much of their personal lives online and social media, but B will occasionally post a few sweet snaps of them together. She’s certainly gotten more lax with it over the years (see: Lemonade) but they still have an air of mystery to them that leaves you wanting more. Even the On The Run tour was a lot for me to handle – so much Bey and Jay time I didn’t know what to do with myself. And this Forever Young/Halo video montage FORGET IT.

Kristen Bell + Dax Shepard

If you’re looking for a couple that you most relate to, it’s probs KBell and Dax. They’re just two Michigan kids who found love in Hollywood, but continue to be sweet and strong midwesterners (is Michigan the midwest?). From this Africa video to their Samsung commercials to the famous sloth surprise video, they are one of the most laid back couples in La La Land.

Rita Wilson + Tom Hanks

Do I really need to explain this? Well, Rita may need to explain her wedding dress, but other than that, you get it.

Lin-Manuel Miranda + Vanessa Nadal

https://www.tumblr.com/funnybutclassy/146456562989/in-the-musical-of-my-life-after-im-long-gone-my

If you aren’t #HamilTrash like us, you probably don’t know how much Lin-Manuel (the creator/star/writer/literal genius behind Hamilton) loves his wife. Like truly is in love with his wife in a poetic way. And we might be too. She’s gorgeous, witty (per Twitter) and equally as smart as Lin – she has a chemical engineering degree from MIT, and when she got bored with that, decided to get her law degree from Fordham. When I’m bored, I stalk the Kardashians on Instagram. Anyways, when he gets the chance to gush over Vanessa, Lin jumps at the opportunity. It’s probably because he’s a master of words, but he makes it seem like their relationship is a great love that cannot be compared. I believe it.

Michelle Obama + Barack Obama

http://bugattiprincess.tumblr.com/post/133273748292/ball-with-the-same-girl-you-was-broke-with

Do I really need to explain this? Part two.

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The Secret Service Looking Chill And Normal

Posted in Entertainment, Outfit Girl by

Two things I know for sure about the Secret Service:

  1. They are bound by honor and duty to take a bullet for the U.S. President. And maybe for the Vice President?
  2. When they’re ‘undercover,’ they dress like aliens who have an academic understanding of what people wear but can’t quite get there.

With the conventions and the upcoming election, we’re thinking about the presidential office even more than usual. Still, it’s important to acknowledge the unsung heroes of the Oval Office: the Secret Service, who definitely look very chill and normal.

The Secret Service at Lollapalooza

https://twitter.com/andrewgill/status/758479179834855424

Last week Malia Obama, recent high school grad and future Harvard student,  attended Lollapalooza (contrast with our summer-after-graduation activities: drinking at our friend Sarah’s house if her mom was at work and watching Laguna Beach).

Unlike most 18-year-olds, Malia was tailed by the Secret Service who – don’t worry – looked super relaxed and youthful in their matching plaid shirts and khaki pants. It’s the same chill look I wore when J. Crew was the sponsor of Dawson’s Creek – very slouchy, incredibly normal.

* These would be my favorite days if I was a Secret Service agent. Like casual Friday.

The Secret Service Shopping In Spain

For this one I imagine they sent someone ahead on a secret recon mission, who confirmed that all of the men in Spain were, for whatever reason, wearing polo shirts that week.

The Secret Service Relaxing At A B-Ball Game

I appreciate that this time they just went for dark suits, Mormon missionary standard-issue white button-downs, no tie — still their regular look, just a little loosened up.

They are also wearing the facial expressions of two aliens trying to look chill and normal at a basketball game.

The Secret Service Going For A Nice Jog

I honestly feel sorry for people too young to remember the Jogging Bill Clinton era. But not TOO sorry, since all those people have, you know, their youth still.

Anyway Slick Willy got really into jogging for a while, and it was sort of a thing on American news outlets and late night shows. If memory serves, he was trailed by a slow-moving car.

In the early 90s, workout clothes had two speeds: multi-colored matching track suits, or shorts for a baby. In this photo we can see it all. Note that here Bill is jogging with both the Secret Service AND the Japanese police, who is about to run over a small old woman.

The Secret Service Sitting Down At A Concert

Best seat at a concert: behind the secret service, who sit all the way down, ducking behind Malia Obama like a toddler being dragged to the church coffee hour with his mom.

The Secret Service Wearing Their Golf Shirts They Bought Together

“Me, Trevor and Steve all bought blue polos, you want us to grab you one?” – the Secret Service shopping group text.

The Secret Service Go Take A Hike

Back at it in those casual plaids. Hey. The Secret Service tries hard and they’re doing a good job.

*** Special Next- Day Update! ***

The Secret Service was recently spotted looking like a dads at Victoria’s Secret while awkwardly waiting for Sasha Obama to finish her shift at Nancy’s, a Martha’s Vineyard fish joint.

Let’s throw it back to some classic MV Secret Service. To their credit, they are not wearing what I imagine their Martha’s Vineyard intel would have told them was a ‘typical’ outfit:

  • GTH pants or Nantucket Reds
  • a Brooks Brothers oxford with pushed-up sleeves
  • a Black Dog hat
  • boat shoes
  • a Vineyard Vines bow tie

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Drop The Mic: Obama’s Best Nerd Prom Jokes

Posted in Miscellany by

Over the weekend, President Obama gave his very last White House Correspondents’ Dinner speech, and he ended it with the best way possible.

Republican or Democrat, I think most of us can agree that he is one of the only presidents with enviable comedic timing. With each of his WHCD speeches, he proved that he can tell a joke and tell it well, and often better than the chosen comedian to speak after him. I looked forward to his Nerd Prom roasts every year, but since we won’t be blessed with his comedy (at least in the White House setting) anymore, at least we have eight speeches to look back on if we ever need a good laugh in the future. Here are some of his best jokes from President Obama’s WHCD speeches over the years.

2016

“While in England, I did have lunch with the Queen, took in a performance of Shakespeare, hit the links with David Cameron. Just in case anybody is still debating whether I’m black enough, I think that settles the debate.”

To Bernie Sanders in the audience: “I’m disappointed you’re distancing yourself from me. That’s just not something you do to your comrade.”

“Last week, Prince George showed up to a meeting in his bathrobe. That was a slap in the face. A clear breach of protocol.”

“I don’t want to spend too much time on the Donald. Following your lead, I want to show some restraint. Because from the start, I think he’s received the right amount of coverage, fitting the seriousness of his campaign. I hope you’re all proud of yourselves. The guy wanted to give his hotel business a boost, and now we’re praying that Cleveland makes it through July.”

2015

On Jeb Bush mistakenly marking “Hispanic” on a form: “Look, it’s an honest mistake – reminds me of when I identified myself as American back in 1961.”

“Rick Santorum announced that he would not attend a gay or lesbian wedding of one of his friends or loved ones, to which gay people responded, ‘That’s not going to be a problem.'”

“And Donald Trump is here. Still.”

“Hillary  kicked things off by going completely unrecognized at a Chipotle. Not to be outdone, Martin O’Malley went completely unrecognized at a Martin O’Malley campaign event.”

“Those Joe Biden shoulder massages, they’re like magic. You should try one. Oh, you have?”

Everything about Keegan-Michael Key as Obama’s “Anger Translator”. Barack will not break. It is amazing.

2014

Everything about the cold open with Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Selina Meyer with Joe Biden

“In 2008 my slogan was, ‘Yes we can,’ in 2013, my slogan was Control, Alt, Delete.”

“Let’s face it, Fox, you’ll miss me when I’m gone. It’ll be harder to convince the American people that Hillary was born in Kenya.”

“How well does ObamaCare have to work before people don’t want to repeal it. What if everyone’s cholesterol drops to 120? What if your yearly check up came with tickets to a Clippers game? Not the old Don Sterling Clippers, the new Oprah Clippers! Would that be good enough? What if it gave Mitch McConnell a pulse?”

“I did notice, Sasha needed a speaker at Career Day. She invited Bill Clinton. I was a little hurt by that.”

“Republicans continue to refuse to extend unemployment insurance. You know what, I am beginning to think that they’ve got a point. If you want to get paid while not working, you should have to run for Congress just like everybody else.”

“These days, the House Republicans give John Boehner a harder time than me, which means that orange really is the new black.”

2013

After DJ Khaled’s All I Do is Win plays as Obama walks to the podium. “How do you like my new entrance music? Rush Limbaugh warned you about this – second term, baby… My advisers were a little worried about the new rap entrance music. They are a little more traditional. They suggested that I should start with jokes at my own expense. Just take myself down a peg. I was like, guys after four and a half years how many pegs are there left?”

“Now, look, I get it. These days, I look in the mirror and I have to admit, I’m not the strapping young Muslim socialist that I used to be. Time passes. You get a little gray.”

“I know republicans are still sorting out what happened in 2012. One thing they all agree on is that they need to do a better job reach out to minorities. Call me self centered, but I can think of one minority they can start with. *raises hand* Think of me as a trial run. See how it goes.

“Some folks still don’t think I spend enough time with Congress. ‘Why don’t you get a drink with Mitch McConnell?’ they ask. Really? Why don’t you get a drink with Mitch McConnell?”

“I remember when BuzzFeed was just something I did in college around 2 a.m.”

That time Beyonce & Jay went to Cuba pre Obama easing Cuban/U.S. relations: “Maybe I have lost a step, but some things are beyond my control. For example this whole controversy about Jay Z going to Cuba. It’s unbelievable. I’ve got 99 problems and now Jay Z is one of them.”

“One senator who has reached across the aisle recently is Marco Rubio. But I don’t know about 2016 – I mean the guy hasn’t even finished a single term in the senate and he thinks he’s ready to be president.”

2012

“I want to especially thank all the members who took a break from their exhausting schedule of not passing any laws to be here tonight.”

“(WHCD host) Jimmy (Kimmel) got his start years ago on ‘The Man Show.’ In Washington, that’s what we call a congressional hearing on contraception.”

“In my first term, we passed health care reform. In my second term, I guess I’ll pass it again.”… In my first term, I sang Al Green; in my second term, I’m going with Young Jeezy. I sing that to her (Michelle) sometimes.”

“Four years ago I was locked in a primary battle with Hillary Clinton. Now she won’t stop drunk-texting me from Cartagena.”

2011

“What a week. As some of you heard the state of Hawaii released my official long-form birth certificate. Hopefully, this puts all doubts to rest. But just in case they’re any lingering questions, tonight I’m prepared to go a step further. Tonight, for the first time, I am releasing my official birth video. *see birth video here* I want to make clear to the Fox News table that was a joke. That was not my real birth video. That was a children’s cartoon. Call Disney if you don’t believe me, they have the original long-form version.”

Obama drags Trump STILL: “Now, I know that he’s taken some flak lately but no one is prouder to put this birth certificate matter to rest than The Donald. And that’s because he can finally get back to focusing on the issues that matter, like, did we fake the moon landing? What really happened in Roswell? And where are Biggie and Tupac? All kidding aside, we all know about your credentials, and your breadth of experience. For example, on a recent episode of Celebrity Apprentice, at the steakhouse, the men’s cooking team did not impress the men from Omaha Steaks. There was lots of blame to go around, but you, Mr. Trump, recognized that the real problem was a lack of leadership. Ultimately, you didn’t blame Lil Jon or Meatloaf, you fired Gary Busey. These are the kinds of decisions that keep me up at night. Well handled, sir! Well handled.”

The President’s Speech trailer (Michelle: Hey, look Sam, there’s a carrot!)

Bonus joke from host Seth Meyers (the best one, TBH): “Trump has said he’s got a great relationship with ‘the blacks.’ Unless the Blacks are a family of white people, I bet he’s mistaken.”

ANOTHER BONUS: This was also the year (night) Barry had secretly ordered Osama Bin Laden to be killed, read more about it here

2010

Remember Jay Leno? “The only person whose ratings fell more than mine last year is here tonight. It is Jay.”

“You might have heard we passed a health care bill and some Republicans have suggested that the bill contains a few secret provisions. That’s ridiculous. There aren’t a few secret provisions in the health care plan - there are, like, hundreds.”

“I wasn’t sure that I should actually come tonight. Biden talked me into it. He leaned over and he said, ‘Mr. President this is no ordinary dinner. This is a big fucking meal.” JIC you forgot what that was in reference to.

2009

“I had an entire speech prepared for this wonderful occasion. Now that we’re here I want to try something different. I’m gonna speak from the heart. I’m gonna speak off the cuff. *telepromopter stands rise* Good evening. Pause for laughter.” (lit’rally his first ever lines from the WHCD)

“Mother’s Day is a tough holiday for Rahm Emmanuel, because he’s not used to saying the word “Day” after “Mother”… That’s true.”

“All our jokes tonight are brought to you by Goldman Sachs. They make money whether you laugh or not.”

“All this change hasn’t been easy. Change never is. So I’ve cut the tension by bringing a new friend to the White House. He’s warm, he’s cuddly, loyal, enthusiastic. You just have to keep him on a tight leash. Every once in a while he goes charging off in the wrong direction and gets himself into trouble. But enough about Joe Biden.”

“In the next hundred days, our bipartisan outreach will be so successful that even John Boehner will consider becoming a Democrat. After all, we have a lot in common. He is a person of color. Although not a color that appears in the natural world. What’s up, John?”

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Michelle + Sophie = FLomance Goals

Posted in Miscellany by

The Canadians have taken over the White House and boy are Americans happy about it. Yesterday, the (fairly) newly elected Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and his wife Sophie Grégoire Trudeau arrived in Washington, D.C., marking the first official visit by a Canadian leader to the U.S. in nearly two decades. If you don’t know anything about Justin Trudeau and “Trudeaumania”, I wrote about him a while back, so get acquainted. You’ll need to as he continues his world domination. Canada and the U.S. have always had a friendly alliance, and that was clearly on display when PM Trudeau and President Obama got together on Thursday. The Internet immediately noticed the budding #bromance between JT and Barry, and soon people were pitching buddy cop comedies and podcasts of them bantering back and forth about which country is better (that was me. I did that).

And while I admit I’d love to see these two become besties and take over the world together, I’d be remiss to glaze over the other romance that’s happening in the Beltway right now – the glory that is power couple Michelle and Sophie. Mophie? Sochelle? Sochelle. Either way – #FLomanceGoals (First Lady).

While the boys were busy talking climate change and international trade and other world leader topics, the women got together at an event for Let Girls Learn, an initiative which promotes girls education. Before speaking to a select group of young ladies from across the country, Michelle said this of her new BFF Sophie:

“(Sophie) is like, my soul mate right now. We’re already gotten into trouble. We’re gonna be in a lot of trouble before this visit is over. In addition to being beautiful and funny, she’s got a great sense of humor – she was cracking me up back there.” {x}

They met hours before, you guys. But it’s easy to see why Mich fell in love so quickly. Backing it up a bit, most of us already know Michelle’s background. But here’s a quick primer on Sophie:

  • She became a national figure as a TV reporter on Canadian entertainment news show, eTalk.
  • Sophie and Justin grew up together in Montreal, since she was friends with his young brother Michel. Years later, they reconnected when they co-hosted a charity event, and started dating a few months later. They married in 2005 and they have three adorable kinder.
  • Sophie’s platform has always been related to women and young girls’ issues, working with various charities throughout Canada.
  • Sophie is fluent in French, English, and Spanish.
  • She is a certified yoga instructor

So now that she’s your favorite person, just imagine being in a room with her AND Michelle. Any time two intelligent, empowering, beautiful, witty ladies get together, I’m into it. But if it’s Michelle and Sophie – I am FOMO jealous to the MAX. Just LOOK at them:

They laugh and have fun!

they dance!

and sophie legit saved michelle from almost falling off the stage. TRUST FALLS.

and when they hug it’s not a fake political hug it is from the bottom of their souls

they empower and encourage girls together!

dorky mom moves are encouraged and applauded!

when your bestie knows you look fine af

michelle doesn’t even want to let go!

the ladies that slay together, stay together.

So, in short, what are the chances we can get the Trudeaus to move to America? Or better yet, have a Trudeau/Obama ticket for… 2016? Too late? Not possible in the slightest? Ok. Well I’ll settle for a seat at their dinner parties then. Goals AF.

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Live Blog: State of the Union

Posted in Live Blogs by

Watch this space: I’ll be live blogging the State of the Union here starting at 9:00 EST. What can I say, it’s the POTUS’s final SOTU and I’m feeling a bit nostalgic. So if you haven’t pledged your  readership to any of the many other SOTU live blogs, come back here tonight – I promise ours will be a lot more fun and 100% less cynical than you’ll find on any political sites.

During the address, be sure to refresh the page periodically to get our latest updates.

9:00 We’ve been promised a “non-traditional” speech. What I’d like that to mean: a song, an elementary school-style skit with Joe Biden as “Narrator”, an interpretive dance, spoken word where the President EMPHASIZES words and employs… pauses… rhetorically.

9:02 According to the commentators, the State of the Union address has already been posted online, if you like reading speeches before you hear them, I guess. Meanwhile over here:

9:07 Everyone is clapping for what seems like an absurdly long time when President Obama enters. I hope this means that the final State of the Union is like the end of senior year of high school, when random people start becoming friendly with each other because they have nothing to gain by being enemies anymore?

9:10 Michelle is in a mustard-y orange & yellow, not even caring that it’s cold because her arms look good and she KNOWS.

9:11 The president promises that the address will be short, which feels like that thing the priest says on Easter morning and it’s always a lie.

9:12 Okay, but Democrats and Republicans do know that the blue/red color code is just for imaginary maps that CNN uses on election night, right? You can all wear all the colors.

9:14 If I were bored at the State of the Union, I’d start counting Tiny American Flag Pins.

9:15 Bernie Sanders looks like he needs a tall glass of orange juice, a nap, and a few hours of sunlight. Campaign life has got to be HARD.

9:20 First topic: the economy. POTUS discusses private sector job growth, gains in auto industry, declining unemployment – but acknowledges changes in economy- automation and outsourcing of jobs causing companies to be less loyal, unequal dispersion of wealth, and less leverage for raises. YES. Basically summarizes my experiences graduating college/starting law school at the beginning of the Great Recession.

9:23 Education is important …. but I’m not so into the reference to No Child Left Behind. Some of those NCLB mandates did much more harm than good. But yes for universal Pre-K!

9:25 That’s why Social Security and Medicare are more important than ever; we shouldn’t weaken them, we should strengthen them. – Obama discusses filling the gaps in employer-based care so that people are still covered (because no, COBRA didn’t really do that).

9:29 Now Obama has to do that dance where he pledges to tackle imbalances that favor large corporations, while affirming that he REALLY LIKES THE PRIVATE SECTOR.

9:31 Okay, we’re getting into it now: Food Stamp recipients didn’t cause the financial crisis; recklessness on Wall Street did. Immigrants aren’t the reason wages haven’t gone up enough; those decisions are made in the boardrooms that too often put quarterly earnings over long-term returns. It’s sure not the average family watching tonight that avoids paying taxes through offshore accounts.

9:32 Talking about American innovation and creativity, the POTUS sort of drags up the Space Race like we’re all secretly still a bit salty about Sputnik.

9:35 Obama declares that America will be the nation to cure cancer – and honestly. We should be. We’re one of the most populous and wealthiest countries on Earth with a solid (though flawed) educational system. I somehow doubt that a lack of brainpower isn’t what has stopped it from happening yet. Let’s get that going.

9:37 From there, Obama goes to climate change. While most reasonable minds agree that clean energy at the LEAST can’t hurt, roughly 25% of the audience starts shifting uncomfortably in their seats and making frowny faces.

9:39 The President says we should be “putting tens of thousands of Americans to work” building 21st century transportation. Sounds a lot like a modern-day New Deal type situation. All of the public sector WPA jobs did great things to stabilize incomes during the Depression, and I’ve been wondering why we haven’t been copying that during the Recession.

9: 42 I’m so interested in how some politicians/outlets use the ISIL acronym and others ISIS (with SISI a distant third).

9:45 There is some minor grumbling when Obama says that ISIL “do not threaten our national existence. That’s the story ISIL wants to tell; that’s the kind of propaganda they use to recruit.” But he’s absolutely correct: by definition, terrorists use fear to operate – which includes instigating the U.S. to take offensive action, thereby further stirring anti-Western sentiments in unstable states.

9:49 On a totally different note, sometimes Paul Ryan’s hairline looks like a heart.

9:50 REMEMBER EBOLA.

9:54 If you’re on Twitter right now, do yourself a favor and start following the #Ham4SOTU tag.

10:03 Obama discusses the necessity for voting reform (yes!), or for those rapping along, corruption’s such an old song that we can sing in harmony, and nowhere is it stronger than in Albany.

10:07 But I can promise that a year from now, when I no longer hold this office, I’ll be right there with you as a citizen — inspired by those voices of fairness and vision, of grit and good humor and kindness that have helped America travel so far.

Hamiltunes translation:

“Everyone shall sit under their own vine and fig tree
And no one shall make them afraid.”
They’ll be safe in the nation we’ve made
I wanna sit under my own vine and fig tree
A moment alone in the shade
At home in this nation we’ve made
One last time

10:10 Obama closes: “That’s the America I know. That’s the country we love. Clear-eyed. Big-hearted. Optimistic that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word. That’s what makes me so hopeful about our future. Because of you. I believe in you. That’s why I stand here confident that the State of our Union is strong.”

But of course, I fill in “Full Hearts, Can’t Lose” after “clear-eyed.” Because Obama is like a combination of Coach and Mrs. Coach, and to mix pop culture references, now he’ll have to teach us how to say goodbye.

 

 

This Is Not Journalism: Best Dressed Of The Nerd Prom

Posted in Entertainment, Outfit Girl by

When Hillary Clinton officially announced her candidacy, I was 97% excited and 3% bummed. That 3% was because I knew that from this point onward, we were in for journalistic masterpieces like Pantsuit Watch 2016. At this weekend’s White House Correspondents’ Dinner, Cecily Strong solved that problem once and for all:

 

It should go without saying that a public figure’s appearance is not news – unless she makes it news. One time when that happens is on the red carpet: part of the deal is that celebrities help promote their designers by mentioning who they’re wearing. We’ll be the first to admit that there’s a home for fashion commentary online – we love outfits so much that we have a post category called Outfit Girl, after all. But what would it look like if journalists paid the barest attention to fashion – just the facts – then switched over to the stuff that really matters? Let’s try it out with the top looks from the White House Correspondent’s dinner.

Michelle Obama

Michelle Obama is a Harvard-educated lawyer wearing a metallic silver dress by Zac Posen. Her Let’s Move! campaign endeavors to reverse the childhood obesity epidemic in the U.S. by promoting exercise and a healthy diet. She has publicly backed economic stimulus packages, the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay act, and LGBT equality, and has made a number of diplomatic trips in the capacity of First Lady. It is an unpaid position, and her hair looks awesome curly.

Cecily Strong

Cecily Strong made her SNL debut at the age of 28, and quickly gained popularity for her off-the-wall characters like the Girl You Wish You Hadn’t Started A Conversation With At A Party. Strong has a BFA in fine arts from CalArts and will be a Ghostbuster next year. This year she served as host of the White House Correspondent’s Dinner, and her appearance was so hilarious that you should just watch the whole thing here. You can locate the funniest jokes by finding which ones nobody laughs at because they’re not sure if they’re allowed to. Here she is in a black and purple gown by J.Mendel and some strong eye makeup, mere hours before absolutely killing it in front of Washington and Hollywood elite.

Gina Rodriguez

Gina Rodriguez is the Golden Globe-winning star of Jane The Virgin, and she used her Globes acceptance speech to express thanks to the Latino community and call out the need for more, and more varied, representation of Latinos in the media. Rodriguez said “This award is so much more than myself, it represents a culture that wants to see themselves as heroes […] My father used to tell me to say every morning, ‘Today is going to be a great day. I can and I will.’ Well, Dad — Today is a great day. I can and I did.” At the White House Correspondents’ dinner, Rodriguez wore a rose-colored Gustav Cadile gown.

Idina Menzel

Idina Menzel is a Tony-winning actress who has also appeared on film and in television, but you may know her best as the voice of Elsa in Frozen … or as Maureen from Rent or Elphaba from Wicked; I guess that depends on your demographic. In addition to her impressive list of stage credits, Menzel created the A BroaderWay Foundation with then-husband Taye Diggs to support disadvantaged youth in the arts. At the WHCD, Menzel sported blonder-than-usual hair, perfect for her upcoming summer-long world tour.  She wore a Monique Lhuillier gown; clutch is by Judith Leiber and jewels are by Jacob & Co.

Lucy Liu

Lucy Liu, an actress known for her roles in Ally McBeal, Southland and Elementary, is also an accomplished visual artist who is fluent in Mandarin. Liu has worked to spread knowledge about human trafficking, as well as serving as a spokesperson for the Human Rights Campaign. Here she is discussing the importance of representation in television:

Also, that sparkly gown is to die for.

Jane Fonda

This sequin gown by Donna Karan is reminiscent of Jane Fonda’s costumes in her breakout role in the 1968 film Barbarella. Since then, Fonda has won two Oscars and built an exercise video empire which – speaking of outfits – popularized that 80s aerobic gear that looks like nothing so much as a full-body wedgie. After sparking controversy for opposing the Vietnam War and supporting the Black Panthers, Fonda’s activism efforts have included establishing the Jane Fonda Center for Adolescent Reproductive Health at Emory University and participating in anti-Iraq War protests.

Ashley Judd

It’s been a rough couple months for Ashley Judd on the internet, so first something positive: she looks fantastic in this Badgley Mischka gown. Missed the online controversy? After posting some rather innocuous tweets in support of her alma mater’s basketball team – the Kentucky Wildcats – Judd faced a deluge of vulgar and threatening messages from mean-spirited trolls. As people who write stuff on the internet, we wouldn’t wish this kind of attack on anybody. However, Judd has spoken out on the inadequacies of platforms like Twitter in dealing with threats, sparking a discussion of how scary and upsetting online bullying can be – and this high-profile commentary just might help change things for the better. This isn’t the only cause Judd supports: she is on the board of directors of YouthAIDS and the  Leadership Council of the International Center for Research on Women.

Connie Britton

On Friday Night Lights, Connie Britton played the fantastic Tami Taylor, my favorite Texan I’m not related to. In real life, Britton is a Dartmouth grad with a resume including television (FNL, Nashville), theater, and film. Outside of her day job, she is a goodwill ambassador with the United Nations Development Programme. Gown by Halston Heritage.

Laverne Cox

If you don’t know who Laverne Cox is, that means you haven’t seen Orange Is The New Black – so first things first, queue it up on Netflix and you won’t regret it. Cox, a graduate of Marymount Manhattan College, was the first openly transgender person to be nominated for an acting Emmy. She has participated in a number of interviews and documentaries to promote understanding and dispel misconceptions about trans people, and speaking of visibility, will you look at her in this silver Ines Di Santo gown?

Barack Obama

Barack Obama, best known as the President Of The United States, is wearing a classic black tux with a bow tie and a flash of white pocket square. Shirt buttons are a dark contrast – mother of pearl, perhaps? – and the lapel is accessorized with a Tiny American Flag Pin. When he isn’t dazzling crowds with red-carpet panache, President Obama is expanding Americans’ access to health care through the Affordable Care Act, tackling financial reform with the passage of the Dodd-Frank act, shoring up the post-recession economy with economic stimuli, and Obama still has time to raise two teenagers and play the occasional pickup game with his Washington buds.

Everyone’s Got Jokes at the Nerd Prom

Posted in Entertainment, Miscellany by

On Saturday, the biggest names in Hollywood and media will descend upon Washington D.C. to mix and mingle with the slightly less ‘household name-y’ politicians of the nation’s capital for the annual White House Correspondents’ Dinner, or what is otherwise (lovingly) called the ‘Nerd Prom’.

While the White House Correspondents’ Association is celebrating its 100th anniversary this year, the dinner itself has been around since 1944. As the years go on, the event has seemingly become more ‘Hollywood’ (much to the chagrin of critics) as the press get to invite their own guests to the dinner, which usually results in the attendance of a veritable Who’s Who in the zeitgeist.

For example this year, USA Today is hosting Taylor Schilling and Uzo Aduba of Orange is the New Black, NBC News has invited Kevin Hart and Olympic snowboarder Sage Kotsenburg, while ABC News is keeping it in the network fam with Modern Family’s Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Eric Stonestreet and Sofia Vergara, and of course no D.C. event isn’t complete with out Darby ‘Sassy Gabby’ Stanchfield, and the POTUS & FLOTUS Tony Goldwyn and Bellamy Young.

Not to mention a comedian is hired every year to host, with the 2014 honor going to The Soup’s own Joel McHale (#SixSeasonsAndAMovie). He’s used to slamming reality TV and news hosts on his show, but will he be able to bring politics in the mix? (My answer: yes)

Over the years, talented comedians have been asked to prepare a comedic speech – usually a roast of the President and politicians – and some have proven to be better than others. Here’s a list of my favorites from the past few years – and a President for good measure.

5) 2012 – Jimmy Kimmel

Best Jokes:

“If you told me when I was a kid I would be standing on a dais with President Barack Obama, I would have said, ‘The president’s name is Barack Obama?'”

“Remember when the country rallied around you in hopes of a better tomorrow? That was hilarious.”

To New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie: “I think you’re misunderstanding New Jersey’s slogan. It’s not the Olive Garden state.”

“Where are the CNN tables? Are the CNN tables real tables or virtual tables?”

4) and 3) 2011 & 2013 – Barack Obama

Because the President gets to crack his own jokes too. And Obama has been the absolute best.

2011 aka The One with Uncomfortable Donald Trump in the Audience

Best Jokes:

Basically all of the Donald Trump part.

2013 aka The One Where We Realized Barry O Had Better Comic Timing and Delivery Than A Lot Of Actors in Hollywood

Best Jokes:

“This whole controversy about Jay Z going to Cuba. I got 99 Problems, and Jay Z is one of them. That’s another rap reference, Bill (O’Reilly).”

“The sequester… the Republicans fell in love with this thing. And now they can’t stop talking about how much they hate it. It’s like we’re trapped in a Taylor Swift album.”

“I remember when Buzzfeed was just something I did in college after 2am.”

On not being on the cover of magazines lately, while Michelle graced the cover of Vogue: “I guess I’m not the strapping young Muslim socialist that I used to be.”

“I’m also hard at work for plans on THE Obama Library, and some have suggested I put it in my birthplace, but I’d rather keep it in the United States.”

2) 2006 – Stephen Colbert

Ah, yes. The most controversial WHCD speech to date. Stephen Colbert went up as “Stephen Colbert” and basically shut down George W. Bush … to his face. Some fans of Bush even left the event because Colbert’s cutting remarks. But hey, who’s got the last laugh now?

Best Joke:

“I stand by this man. I stand by this man because he stands for things. Not only for things, he stands on things. Things like aircraft carriers and rubble and recently flooded city squares. And that sends a strong message, that no matter what happens to America, she will always rebound—with the most powerfully staged photo ops in the world.”

1) 2011 – Seth Meyers

The WHCD was made for Seth Meyers. He’s intelligent, knowledgable and able to pull off a joke without being rude. I mean this is a guy who had been the anchor on SNL’s Weekend Update for years, and he knows some of the best writers in the biz. Get them all together and you have a speech of Fey/Poehler Golden Globes-like proportions. And the best host of the dinner by far.

Best Jokes:

“This event tonight has grown past Washington and many Hollywood celebrities are also here tonight. John Hamm is here. Yea. John Hamm looks the way every Republican thinks they look. Zach Galifianakis is also here. Zach Galifianakis looks the way Republicans think every Democrat looks.”

“Let’s start with Mitt Romney. Mitt Romney wrote a book titled “No Apologies.” No apologies? When you have to proclaim ‘no apologies’ isn’t that a tacit admission you’ve made a lot of mistakes? If I come home from a trip to Vegas and the first thing I say to my girlfriend is ‘no apologies’, we’re going to have a follow-up conversation.”

“Donald Trump has been saying he will run for President as a Republican, which is surprising since I just assumed he was running as a joke… Donald Trump said recently he has a great relationship with the blacks, but unless the blacks are a family of white people I bet he is mistaken.”

“The President and Joe Biden were not invited to the Royal Wedding and when Biden found out he immediately said to the President: ‘you, me, Wedding Crashers 2.’ I’ll book us two Amtrak tickets to London. The Vice-President loves the trains. And I assume it must have been hard for the President to tell Biden the new budget cut $1.5 Billion from high speed rail. ‘Joe, come on in, take off your Engineer’s cap. I have some bad news about the Choo-choos.’ As he broke the news, one of the straps on Joe’s overalls, sadly drooped off his shoulder.”

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